It’s true that I’m not nor will I ever be a paid athlete. And for most of my adult life, as a runner, I ran for the health benefits and for recreation. I signed up for races and trained for them, and while I participated I never got any better. I just did the same shit over and over again. I just finished the race.
I feel differently now. And I think you feel this way too. We want to get better. Test our limits. And while it may just be a game we play with ourselves, with goals and numbers in our heads, it makes us athletes.
I want to know just what I’m capable of. I don’t want to leave potential on the table because I trained stupidly. A part of me believes I’m doing that right now. But, because I still don’t have clearly defined goals I am a drift in this metaphysical morass. What kind of athlete am I? What do I want to achieve? Blahh blahh blahh My midlife crisis continues.
Monday dumbness. I was supposed to run, but slept in. Husband left for work at 6 am. Awake and wanting to do soemthing to advance the ball, I decided to lift. Forgetting I had benched y’day, I decided to make this my military day.
I couldn’t figure out why everything felt so damn heavy. I decided to bag the pullups, and do extra MP sets. Midway through those Eureka! Happy to have an explanation for my suckiness, I instantly felt better–less guilty for chickening out on the pullups more confident that I could muddle through.
Beautiful fall day. Happy 4 mile run. Made up my missed jumps from yesterday. 15x box, long and rebound. I’m getting better at these and damnit if they’re not starting to be fun.
The first time I tried to do a box jump I was afraid–and it’s not that it was particularly high. I actually had to go over to the stairs in my house and build confidence by jumping up on to the first step. So sad. And not just because I sucked.
[quote]Nadia Comeandeat wrote:
The first time I tried to do a box jump I was afraid–and it’s not that it was particularly high. I actually had to go over to the stairs in my house and build confidence by jumping up on to the first step. So sad. And not just because I sucked. [/quote]
I had to do the same last week - just started trying to jump again. It is kinda funny once you get the confidence and think back on it. That jump from one step to two steps was oddly challenging mentally for me. I wouldn’t think it is sad though - everyone needs a starting point.
[quote]Nadia Comeandeat wrote:
We want to get better. Test our limits. And while it may just be a game we play with ourselves, with goals and numbers in our heads, it makes us athletes. [/quote]
For myself, I don’t consider myself an athlete. If a gun were put to my head and I was forced to divulge the real reason I lift, it would be equal parts vanity and enjoyment of the process. Vanity because my body is way hotter with all the lifting, and I want to keep it that way. Enjoyment of the process because heavy weights are one of the very few things that focus my attention away from my internal dialogue a/k/a monkey mind.
Sure, PRs are fun and I want them. And I have lifetime goals written down so I know where I’m headed. And it is way more fun to train smart than training mindlessly. But incrementally doing a little better on something in the gym over the time before is more than plenty for me. There is no timetable. There is no prize.
So, I am an “athlete”? mmmmm…not. Are you, with goals uppermost in your thoughts? It sounds like it! You just don’t know exactly what flavor yet.
Laststand: I was just sad beause I didn’t recognize myself. I was surprised by my fear. But you’re right. It’s the having started that is important now. And I feel really good about the progress I’m making. And jumping is fun. Good luck to you with your jumps.
Kimba: I won’t argue that athlete point with you. Just know that I REALLY want to. And there’s no shame in vanity as a goal. Vanity is a good thing–it’s just prioritizing and taking care of yourself. I’m all about it. Look good, feel good, do good.
[quote]Nadia Comeandeat wrote:
Kimba: I won’t argue that athlete point with you. Just know that I REALLY want to. And there’s no shame in vanity as a goal. Vanity is a good thing–it’s just prioritizing and taking care of yourself. I’m all about it. Look good, feel good, do good. [/quote]
hey nadia! i’m late to the party too, but I wanna contribute! You seem like a very positive, encouraging person, and I’m ALL for people like you. You give back man–WORD!
I felt great when I woke up this am. But damn it was cold in the gym. Jumping jacks until I couldn’t take the snap crackle pop sounds in my ankles anymore. Running up and down the stairs until I was warm enough to take off a layer.
Squats 45x5x2; 70x3; 80x3; 90x15.
Boring but bigged it squats: 65x10x5.
GHR 10x5: done with hands on ass–easier yes–but a girl with a pancake ass needs to grab on to hope where she can find it. Hope found. If I could grab my own ass when squatting, I totally would.
I want to know just what I’m capable of. I don’t want to leave potential on the table because I trained stupidly. A part of me believes I’m doing that right now. But, because I still don’t have clearly defined goals I am a drift in this metaphysical morass. What kind of athlete am I? What do I want to achieve? Blahh blahh blahh My midlife crisis continues. [/quote]
This really spoke to me!! I’m having the same crisis, lol…
Nikki: Thanks for stopping by in your short-shorts! You rock them.
NLmain: If you’re offering up some of your sensualASSness, yes I’ll take some.
Kimba: Thanks for the link. But the clam and the fire hydrant–seriously? Much the acquisation of a good butt come with such indignity?
Cal: Yes no heat. I’m a very delicate flower with a happy temperature range of about 3 degrees–or so my husband suggests. I’m always either too hot or too cold (mostly too cold though). But the convenience of a home gym is huge. Plus it allows me superset my training with bad dance moves and other goofy stuff better kept out of the public eye.
Mim and Masch: I’ve been reading your posts. And I feel you. But there are really no bad or wrong choices… really the worst thing we can do is stand still and not move forward in one direction or another. So keep on keeping on. I’m going to follow Kimba’s advice and try to be more process rather than goal orientated. I’m enjoying everything I’m doing and for right now, that’s enough.
[quote]Nadia Comeandeat wrote:
GHR 10x5: done with hands on ass–easier yes–but a girl with a pancake ass needs to grab on to hope where she can find it. Hope found. If I could grab my own ass when squatting, I totally would. [/quote]
LMAO
Grab your own ass while squatting? You and me both.
I like that booty link.
I like the concern at the end; “I don’t want to do them in my gym, I’ll look funny.”
Bah, I love humping the barbell on Bench Friday
Mim and Masch: I’ve been reading your posts. And I feel you. But there are really no bad or wrong choices… really the worst thing we can do is stand still and not move forward in one direction or another. So keep on keeping on. I’m going to follow Kimba’s advice and try to be more process rather than goal orientated. I’m enjoying everything I’m doing and for right now, that’s enough. [/quote]
Enjoyment of the process because heavy weights are one of the very few things that focus my attention away from my internal dialogue a/k/a monkey mind.