Learn to Speak Womanese

Off Topic
41

[quote]bjalifts wrote:
Professor X wrote:
t-ha wrote:

See. We are very straight forward. So why all of the confusion?

So T-men…help a girl out, OK??

What do guys WANT to talk about?
So far I’ve figured this is about it…

Sports
Sex
Bosses, if they’re jerks
Sex
Politics
Sex

And really, that’s about all, right?
(my guy’s not a big talker, you can tell)

[/quote]

Silence is golden. Sometimes, what isn’t said means more than what is.

IE: Unless it’s important or interesting, we don’t care.

Women don’t actually care about there day, they just want to make sure we’re listening… which is stupid. We’re obviously not going to listen to something YOU don’t care that much about.

42

[quote]bjalifts wrote:
Professor X wrote:
t-ha wrote:

See. We are very straight forward. So why all of the confusion?

So T-men…help a girl out, OK??

What do guys WANT to talk about?
So far I’ve figured this is about it…

Sports
Sex
Bosses, if they’re jerks
Sex
Politics
Sex

And really, that’s about all, right?
(my guy’s not a big talker, you can tell)

[/quote]

actually, we don’t really like talking at all, those are just areas most of us have in commmon, so when we are forced to commence in small talk, we start with those.
say what needs to be said, then shut the hell up

43

Pookie are u a wanna be Pook from sosuave.com?

44

I found “conversate” at dictionary.com

Webster’s New Millennium? Dictionary of English - Cite This Source
Main Entry: conversate
Part of Speech: v
Definition: to socialize and chat; to converse with another
Etymology: back-formation from conversation
Usage: slang

45

A guy named “Pook” on another message board posted about “womanese”, some choice selections from which are below:

I’m not looking for a relationship right now.

TRANSLATED: I don’t want a relationship WITH YOU. Don’t even BOTHER trying to go out with me since I am saying that a relationship with you and me is already not going to happen.

The kids were bad today.
TRANSLATED: Obviously, your genes are defective!

We were both wrong.
TRANSLATED: But you were more wrong!

This recipe didn’t turn out how I expected.
TRANSLATED: I burned dinner. Try and complain. I DARE you.

Honey, I HATE to interrupt…
TRANSLATED: As if you were doing anything more important.

Have you had time to…
TRANSLATED: Stop what you’re doing, get up, and do it RIGHT NOW!

When you get a chance…
TRANSLATED: Do this immediately!

I hate to nag but…
TRANSLATED: I want you to get off the couch now!

Let’s not rush things.
TRANSLATED: I have other prospects.

I enjoy the single life!
TRANSLATED: I enjoy not being with YOU!

I’m focusing on my ‘career’.
TRANSLATED: My training and studying for my career is extremely boring and tedious yet more exciting then you’ll ever be.

Let’s just give it some time.
TRANSLATED: You’re not high on my rating list. You’re good insurance policy if a better prospect doesn’t show up.

I like you, but…
TRANSLATED: I don’t like you at all.

I don’t want to ruin our friendship.
TRANSLATED: Please continue to remain my girly friend. You make an excellent emotional tampon!

Honesty is very important to me.
TRANSLATED: Only tell me what I want to hear.

We need…
TRANSLATED: I want…

Can you call me back? I need to…
TRANSLATED: I just need an excuse to get off the phone. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings so I LIED BLATANTLY TO YOUR FACE. Oh, and have a nice day!

How about you give me YOUR number.
TRANSLATED: I’ll add it to my trophy collection of guy’s phone numbers - pathetic guys who want me but I don’t want them!

I’m not upset…
TRANSLATED: I’m upset.

Do you love me?
TRANSLATED: I’m going to ask you for something expensive…

Am I fat?
TRANSLATED: Please tell me I’m beautiful.

We need to talk…
TRANSLATED: I need to complain!

I need to think about it.
TRANSLATED: No way.

Let me think about it
TRANSLATED: No

46

conversate: (v) to cause random syllables existing in one or more concepts to coalesce in unpredictable ways and change state into language; occurs when the intelligence of the concept drops below the concept’s IQ point

47

[quote]bjalifts wrote:
Professor X wrote:
t-ha wrote:

See. We are very straight forward. So why all of the confusion?

So T-men…help a girl out, OK??

What do guys WANT to talk about?
So far I’ve figured this is about it…

Sports
Sex
Bosses, if they’re jerks
Sex
Politics
Sex

And really, that’s about all, right?
(my guy’s not a big talker, you can tell)

[/quote]

History is a fave of mine, anciant Greek, Roman, Egyptian, Arthurian myths, Religion, sex. What I don’t want to talk about is work, who’s doing who etc.

48

I like to talk about politics when I’m high.

Colors are also cool.