I grew up in ABQ for 27 years and moved away about 8 years ago, but go back every couple of years to visit family.
Below are my response to your questions:
Fly into ABQ. You will spend an hour just waiting for a plane to SF that you could be using to see the South West and the drive is only an hour. The drive from ABQ to SF is all Interstate so it goes by quickly and the scenery is pretty cool. Also, you can spend some time in ABQ (See comment below). Also, if you like gambling there are several Indian casino's enroute.
Old Town in ABQ is cool, also take the Tram. The Tram will take you to the top of the Sandia Mountains and you can over-look the entire town of ABQ, but the ride up the mountain is really cool in and of itself. You can eat dinner at a restaurant on top of the mountain over looking the city of ABQ. The restaurant is called High Finance but if I remember correctly, the price is kinda reasonable. Nice dinner and then you take the tram back down the mountain at night with all the sparkling lights of the city...very romantic. Definately a get-laid night. Route 66 is crap, so don't even think of trying to experience "Route 66".
On the other side of SF, go to Taos. Taos is a more intense version of SF....lots of galleries, lots of culture, etc.
Don't know any specific restaurants but if you just try the smaller type mom-n-pop restaurants you probably can't go wrong. Don't go to the big chains like Chili's to experience authentic New Mexican food. Also, be careful...when they offer chili it can be very hot...ask the waiter to see how hot the chili is. Also, the chili isn't like Texas Chili with the beans and meet...it will be real red or green chili.
This all depends on what you want to do. Other then the hotel, you can get by on $20 a day if you want, or $2K a day. This all depends on do you eat at the Inn of the Anasazi or do you eat at Maria's food cart.
If you have any specific questions, PM me.