T Nation

Pushy Women

It seems that some modern women go out of their way to be aggressive. Perhaps they feel a need to live up to some sort of unrealistic reality played for them by organizations such as NOW (National Organization of Women). Perhaps it is instilled in them on a subconscious level from the constant bombardment of the wrong media messages.

I feel that when a woman becomes unrealistically aggressive that they not only harm their own psyches, but do damage to any potential man, woman relationship that they might be trying to foster. If a woman becomes a man, in attitude, then a man in order to achieve the delicate balance in any reltionship may begin to act more like a woman being more passive when the situation may call for the opposite. A loss of T shortly follows.

Assertiveness, on the other hand, is a good thing for a woman to have, as it allows her to state who she and still maintain her femininity. She can walk away from any man who attempts to abuse her in any way. Yet, she feels no need to constantly compete with men, as she is secure with her femininity.

Some of the leaders in the womens movement, and some female politicians have indeed done a disservice to all women. They have pushed a sort of new age masculinity upon them. Not allowing them to be who they really are. They feel a need to live up to a certain unrealistic, unattainable ideal. This ideal which is rife with aggressiveness has not served most women very well. And has infact, harmed many relationships and caused unnecessary pain and heartache.

How do you T-men feel about it?

If a woman acts the way you describe, I simply tell her to hit the road after slapping her a few times.

you didn’t think to write this after all that bitching about TC’s article, did you? :wink:

I would have to agree. I’ve personally had to deal with some of these so called ‘strong women’ before and besides being weaker than most women once you get to know them, they are also so unbalanced they end up medicated or even worse, Mormons! The whole deal on them forcing their men to become more feminine I’ve also witnessed first hand. In fact my buddy become such a goddamn pussy because of his chick he’s now nursing his wounds at home waiting for her to leave college before he goes back! Moral of the story, don’t let your chick cut off your dick.

There are truly strong women, like my wife and there are those that are overcompensating for something, like my neighbor.

The overcompensators try to dominate their guy and sometimes it works. In my neighbor’s case it didn’t. They don’t get along the best and he’s mentioned looking for another woman to me in the past.

My wife and I get along great. I don’t expect to have to “save her” or be the knight in shining armor. Neither of us feels the need to dominate. I can get that fix at work or other places and she gets hers from training 1200 lb. beasts to bend to her will.

I don’t think every relationship has to have a dominant and a submissive partner. If you’re lucky enough to find someone that’s your equal in just about every way you don’t need that shit.

I don’t, and never have, viewed strength as a male characteristic…it’s a human one. I see just as many weak men overcompensating by putting 44" tires on their 4x4s (that never get dirty or leave the road) as I do women doing something similar. Actually I see a lot more weak people of either gender than any truly strong people (I’m talking mentally here).

Someone who is strong doesn’t need to be pushy and they generally don’t feel the need to be because they are calm and secure with who they are. That’s not to be confused with someone that won’t stand up for themselves…say in a situation where a mechanic is trying to pull some shit on the “little lady” because he thinks he can.

Steely, once again you speak the truth. Weak people, men and women, who don’t have the balls to stand up for themselves usually end up taking it out on their family when they get home. I have unfortunately dealt with people like this and it makes me sick. Passivism is such a turn off.

I find that aggressive women respond well to aggressive behavior on your own part. Women of this sort will push you around as much as you’ll let them, but if you put your foot down and act as the bigger asshole (convincingly, mind you) they will act a whole lot nicer. The problem with this type though is that the second you relax, they are back on you again, and no half assed level of dominance assertion will suffice. These types are a pain in the ass, stick to the confident type who don’t feel compelled to push you into a domineering relationship structure.

Is aggression an acceptable behavior for men?

It all depends on how the word is defined.

I cant stand pushy women…and I really cant stand pushy men!!!

Anyone who feels the need to be pushy is a buttmonkey!

Totally agree with you Zeb!
Being a lady (or a nice person, period) doesn’t equate to being a pushover.

My mother-in law was a bully in high school and she still tries to dominate everyone. Tries to tell ME how things are to be in MY family. Don’t friggin’ think so. She also thinks she’s the worlds authority on everything! So you can’t tell her anything. Even her husband says she’s Still a bully. (Even bullies him)

I can’t stand her. Can’t respect him.

Billy

Assertiveness is the result of strength, aggressiveness is generally a symptom of weakness. Most bullys are weak inside. Most pushy people are as well. It’s overcompensation.

that’s why al bundy created NO MAAM.

steely
some people just like the look of a lifeted truck(i don’t have one btw)
some like mini trucks, gawd knows why but they do. doesn’t mean they are compensating for anything. that’s kinda like how women say guys that drive lamborghini’s or ferraris must have lil peepee’s and need the car to get girls. can’t a guy just like how a car looks, and it be just that? just my 2cc

mdog,

yeah, really man. why is it if a guy wants anything nice he must have a small dick, but if he doesn’t have nice things, he’s a loser. i mean, wtf?

I wanna get a new vette soon…and I want it cause it’s a childhood dream of mine, not to mention they look awesome and are fast! Besides, i wouldn’t want to meet a girl that’s after me cause of my car, anyway.

MORG
i would luv a 2002 silver Z06, j-lo ain’t got chit on that assend.

Dude, having a nice car, when it all comes down to it is all about getting attention be it from women, other dudes, parents, mentors whatever…

Same goes for having a nice house, nice body, nice clothes, damn silverware, cool wine goblets, a bumping system, its all about getting attention.

But it’s ok, because it’s not only human nature, it’s animal nature…

The buck with the biggest antlers always gets the prime doe.

The peacock with the most intense feathers…

The Tom turkey with the biggest beard…

sorry for the hyjack…

B.

“Not allowing them to be who they really are.”

Who do you think they really are?

Not every guy with a small dick has a lifted truck, some of them have powerboats. OK, not really. It was one example and don’t tell me you have never seen a lifted truck under the ass of a guy that wasn’t compensating. Does that make it true of all guys with lifted trucks? No.

I had a small lift on a Jimmy. I’d have gotten a bigger one but I’m too well hung. <<—weak joke alert. I’ve had a Vette too. I was looking for a nice TR6 but couldn’t find one in Hawaii. It was a 76, nice power, poor handling.
I had a couple of nice vans too. They hauled my dive gear out of the weather and were great places to party or get laid if the need arose. The one thing you can be sure of if a guy has a nice ride is that he has a nice ride, the rest you have to dig to find.

I guess there is no one flag aggressive or pushy people run up the pole to let you in on the secret they are weak and fearful on the inside. For every rule there is an exception, or two, so jumping to conclusions based on one thing like a car, clothes, or whatever is premature but sometimes it’s good entertainment.