But they’re not fathers…
I understand your point, it’s just funny how you framed it.
But this isn’t how it actually works. Or, abortion would be illegal excepting for some very rare circumstances.
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I ended up signing a few forms when it came time to fill out the birth cert info and submit everything for a SSN. couldn’t tell you want the forms were for the life of me though.
One of the reasons I distinctly remember it was because I was out of wedlock for the first kid and there was an additional form to give her my last name over my wifes
If you’re the father of record on the birth certificate, you’re the father in the court’s view. “Case closed.”
“Next case!” (Which in family court means drug abuse, molestation, custody fights etc…) much more heinous stuff.
Hmmm. I honestly do not remember signing anything even for the birth certicate. I’m sure I did, but it’s weird that I don’t remember it.
Ya, I understand what you’re saying it’s just total nonsense (the court’s position that is).
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Those days are so chaotic I’m surprised most people remember anything. I probably wouldn’t remember anything if my time was more conventional
Both of my stints involved my wife in a hospital bed for 3+ days and kids in the NICU for 11+ though. We didn’t get to do the whole in n out in 48 hours thing
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I mean, it’s a paternity test. An empirical test. It needn’t choke up the courts. “What was the outcome of the test? (In case of positive)And the followup test? Ok, my judgement, in accordance with the law…”
That sucks.
Okay. So same question about Pap smears, then. Is it insulting to suggest a woman get a pap smear if she claims to be a virgin?
Tsunami is a word that has no measurable definition in this case, so I don’t see a point in debating it.
However, if the rate of false paternity is even 1% (which even conservative estimates suggest it is), the rate is much higher than many other conditions that are tested for in infants. PKU, one of the conditions tested in infant heel pricks, has a rate of approximately .01% yet we screen every infant for it. Why is the emotional and financial health of cuckolded men not important?
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Eh it was prenatal high blood pressure (that gun to my head I would bet my life was self induced with my wife’s breath takingly bad stress management abilities). Both kids ended up being fine, just very very tiny
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I’m not sure why you classify that as fathers escaping their obligations. In no other situation does a man go to court and prove that he was deceived into giving resources to another and the court’s response is that because he was deceived once the just thing is for him to continue giving resources to the deceiver. It’s so preposterous that it boggles the mind.
Yeah, all those stupid people who get deceived by women are just dumb and they had it coming. Why would we have any sympathy for them? We should make sure that courts actively punish them for being so gullible.
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That’s good to hear.
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Seriously though. Repeat after me: “life isn’t fair.” A woman can erase the parental consequences of unprotected sex by either having an abortion or giving the kid up to a church or adoption agency. They essentially get off scott free (financially anyway).
The man has no vote on abortions one way or the other and is financially responsible for any kid deemed “his” by the court. Either by you TELLING the state the kid is yours on the birth certificate. Or by a court ordered paternity test.
Is the social and governmental paradigm around family law incredibly stacked against men? Yes. There are many disadvantages in law and in practice to being male (charge/conviction rates, the draft, family leave etc…).
Here’s the thing I’d say to a guy who got wronged: “You’re a man. Man up and deal with it. You got duped by a woman and raised a kid to the best of your ability? You still did good and acted honorably and that kid is better for having you in his life, not his two timing biological father. Get over it and make the best of it.”
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I don’t believe in forced anything. Yeah, the guy in the story got screwed, but lies always come out. Hitting a fly with a sledgehammer is not a good idea. No mandatory paternity tests. A voluntary, private one could be an option, but not mandatory.
Life isn’t fair for many reasons. That isn’t, however, justification for making it not fair. Nor is it a reasonable explanation for why the court system should actively work to keep it unfair. This thread was started with a fairly reasonable solution as to how it can be assured that many people won’t be wronged.
Your response is a man up and take it speech. Man up and deal with it means making the world a better place. Not accepting that the world is going to fuck you in the ass and you need to be a man and say thank you.
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Bad precedent again. Usually medical procedures done on kids need both parents’ consent. There is a paternity test van that drives around in depressed neighborhoods.
Wait we can buy paternity test over the counter?
You can do this without the mother’s permission if you are really suspicious?
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Wow, you had premature twins? That had to be a rough time. I hope and glad everything seems ok with you now…
That’s not being a man. That’s being a victim. And accepting it because of some stupid machismo pep talk that would gag real men. Men agitate for change in bad law. Be a man!!! Not sure about you, but my father didn’t teach me to be walked on, victimized, or settle for injustices because “be a man.” No, when he uttered such a phrase it would have been in opposition to such things.
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