Your Way of Dealing With Stress?

I’m quite curious as to why younger generations see this as such an abhorrent thing.

I judge people all the time because that’s what we humans do.

I feel this is more about controlling what people say more than anything.

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Same. But it only seems to be a problem for the emo masses if it’s negative. Warm-fuzzy judging is welcome. lol

Look, its an other thing try making a human see the positive side or an alternative to his/her problem, and another just to call him names like you are lazy/want the easiest way round etc
I’m pro advising, pro positive help, pro discussion to make him/her realize some things in the right moment of course, but not just judging to judge, and we must always keep in mind that each human confront different situations, we can’t just insert a judgment when we don’t know what the other has to deal with his personal life, right?
I mean he says he supports his family, come on did you actually did that in your 20’s?
I’m 21 and that sounds VERY hard to me… I can’t even imagine it, its another thing to work to earn your own money, and another to lift a whole family and having to make choices for other people, too.
Call me selfish or even weak but that really touches me.
But if you did that then congratulations, you along with @probnit8 are some of the strongest people I know.

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Why say something then unsay it?

This is what I did, I offered an anecdote and philosophy for my approach to life.

Re: Judging, judgy and harsh

In a world of snowflakes, limiting perceived suffering, fear of confrontation, fear of hurting someone’s feelings or having hurt feelings, I have greatly benefited. I’m not afraid of any of those things and, therefor, have been able to accelerate my life. The standard for hard work has been lowered so far that my 60 hours is shocking to people.

It’s very easy, and cowardly, to scream from the stands that things aren’t how you want them, but no one is willing to confront behavior one-on-one. Calling someone lazy, based on their own description of themselves, isn’t rude. If that person isn’t lazy, then they should not represent themselves in that way. That’s on them, not me.

If someone knows the solution to their problem, but chooses to do nothing about it (for convenience, cause it’s not fair, etc), then isn’t actually a problem, and they don’t have a right to complain.

@loppar have you read Skin In The Game? Taleb has interesting thoughts on a family unit vs. individual.

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Well, at least nobody’s been called a sissy on this thread yet. Oh wait, shit, never mind.

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I’ve read literally everything from NNT. Is it that obvious?

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Sure. Feel free to send me some tips. If I don’t even need to use them now, I might need to in the future.

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That is also true. Therefore I’ll ignore them from now on.

Thank you a lot for this one.

My family doesn’t completley depend on me financially, but without me jumping in - things would crumble pretty fast.

I also have feeling that they don’t even read what I post. I’m needed to do some stuff at home as much as I’m sometimes needed to help financially. Reason more why I can’t accept a job with 50-60+ work hours a week… plus my social life means a lot to me, and I start to fall apart emotionally if that’s taken away from me.

I want to have more of a life than just surviving. Just “making more money” won’t make me happy. That is not a “life” for me. I want to work to live, not live to work. You can’t take your money to your grave. But still I want to accomplish some things.

I will keep sustaining my family. I will get one surgery done (minor stuff to permanently solve troubled tooth) and finish university.

I don’t think anyone has said otherwise. My point is that time exists outside of the present. Immediate suffering for long-term success. If life is 75 years, and 5 is suffering (used very loosely) that is only 6% of ones life. If the benefit is 40% more income over the course of 30 years, it’s certainly worth it IMO.

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You’re right, I missed that. My life isn’t comparable, I come home to a robe, beer and a blowy.

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@probnit8

The system broke and the reporting package was due so I worked 11 hours yesterday, went home ate some dinner and then pulled an all nighter to deliver my work on time. So we’ll call that another 8 for good measure. So, 19 hours. And I have a four year degree with 10 years progressive experience.

The funny thing is this is the easiest finance job I’ve had. When I rolled out Oracle to two plants simultaneously, the ops and QA guys broke a ton of shit for go live and I worked 3 days straight through, just so I wouldn’t get fired… that wasn’t even to look good or advance. That’s just what the job required.

If you want money and you can’t figure out how to build systems and create value for people on your own, you need to work son.

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Without going into detail, I completely sympathize.

I get where probnit8 is coming from, and to a degree, I’m on the same page.

No, I’m not going to work my entire life away, just to better feed the maggots with my fat when I’m dead. I think entirely too much is expected of people with far too little compensation.

I also believe people accept too little. If I dont see constant and steady progression over the first 3 years. Be it monetary, knowledge, benefits, promotions, whatever, I’m out of the job. Until I find myself in a job that provides well enough, I won’t sit stagnant. I see far too many people sit back and complain about their $12/hr they’ve been stuck at for 2 years.

Also, the antagonists are right. Sure, I dont care to work long hours. Honestly, if I didn’t have to work, I wouldn’t. I really wouldn’t. But in the interim, yeah, I pulled 4 months of 12 hour shifts, Monday through Friday, and partial Saturdays, and busted my fucking ass for every minute of it, to prove invaluable to my new company. I got a raise, I got a promotion, and in the good graces of all my superiors.

But in the end, all the old timey blue collar workers will call you a snowflake and tell you get over it. While all the mellinials will tell them it’s not the same it used to be, and the compensation vs cost of living is vastly different than it used to be. And not a damn thing is going to change either sides minds.

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No one would.

One can chose his/hers path. Working 80 hours/week or sitting at home and collecting welfare being two extremes on the pendulum. Who’s to judge? Stones, glass houses and all that.

But the point is, if one chooses a path, then he/she shouldn’t whine about it, especially if their life choices and wishes are mutually exclusive. “I don’t work to hold a regular job/why on I earth I don’t have enough money it’s the government’s fault” being prime examples of the dichotomy.

I think this is more of a “your dick isn’t dead” test than a T test.

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Lol! My first thought was this is a “Well, now I know I like girls or very large men test”

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It’d be interesting to start a conversation on SITG vis a vis individual vs family unit. The (negative-)incentive to take care of one’s family, choose spouses wisely, make good financial decisions, legal decisions, etc.

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I get you on this one.

I pulled 5 months on 10 hour shifts, and I didn’t get a shit for it. It was paid OK but still, considering number of hours… could be better.

Irony is that on “shitty do nothing jobs” I managed to earn more than lots of people who work their asses off on long shift manual labour jobs. Like when I worked in D2D for teleoperator (door to door) as salesman. I actually had really good sales so I was actually paid pretty well.

So I tend to aim for jobs where you can get bonuses.
Not hard, not over 40hrs a week, and if you actually try and are good at it - you get nice money at the end of the month.

I’ll probably work for another year or 2 as promotor and then try myself out as car salesman, like few of my former coworkers from this job did and had some good results, and they now earn ridiculously good money because their sales are good.

I saw a debate with him where he was absolutely terrible and have avoided anything he touches since. I’m surprised he still has fans, but obviously don’t know his other work very well.