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Your Most Evil Routine


Which routine/workout you did once was the hardest in terms of soreness, cramps, sickness and kickassishness?
Bring forth the training stories that your body remembered most vividly!

Unbelievably, mine was a callisthenics workout:
Having some refreshing evening cardio in mind, I approached my favorite stadium to find it closed. Some fat warden wouldn't let me in and as I had a overheated discussion with him, a stupid broad went remarked "I guess some people just need an excuse not to get busy" and went, along with the majority, to a nearby lawn, roughly the size of the stadium.

Somehow she hit a nerve and I decided to train visibly the hardest among the bunch of jogging wussies.

Afterwards, I was royally sore for six days, the first two days I was nearly helpless. Descending stairs was clenched-teeth- grunting pure pain, my tempo was that of an arthritis granny.

The workout
20 frog jumps(you jump with both legs sim. as far as you can and land in a deep squat position)
10 sec rest, 20 more to starting point
30 sec rest
20 frog jumps more
10 sec rest
20 lunges,
10 sec rest
20 lunges back
30 sec rest

20 lunges backwards, to original starting point
no rest, two fast laps (about 800m), not a sprint but consid. faster then anyone else.
short rest, 50 squats, wide stance
no rest, two laps again (at this point I felt that was a bad idea)
longer rest, like 1-2 minutes 50 squats, narrow stance
last two laps,
rest again

squats until fried, (took about sixty), then ten partial squats at bottom, the at middle position, at which point my legs felt like falling apart and then the top position. The partial squats were with horrible form.
Then I jogged home.
The core workout probably took no longer then 15-20 minutes.


16 timed 110 yard sprints with 45 sec rest between. we had 16 sec each. I weighed 298 pounds and made all of them.


Hardest workout ever: This was a squat workout I got from a BB magazine. I did:
405 x max reps
365 x max reps
315 x max reps
275 x max reps
225 x max reps
185 x max reps
135 x max reps
- only enough rest to change the weights, and I stopped each set when my form started to break. I could barely walk for a week and a half.

I also got put through a 3x3, 3 sets of 3 exercises, one push, one pull, one legs. Each set taken to failure, strip set style(2-3 times on each set of each exercise). I thought I was going to die.


A1. Iso-dynamic straight-arm pulldowns, 10/8/6/4/2/0 seconds pause at the bottom each respective rep

A2. Straight-arm pulldowns, normal repetitions

A3. Negative only wide-grip pullups, 2 sets of BWx8

A4. BB plate pullovers, 2 sets of 35x8

B1. Lat Pulldown complex consisting of:
-Behind the neck lat pulldowns
-Front lat pulldowns
-Leaning lat pulldowns
-Lower back lat pulldowns (a.k.a. lat pulldowns with excessive cheating)
-3 sets
-All sets using 120 pounds of weight to failure on each stage

C1. Seated Rows, 2 sets
-Drop set
-Starting weight = 135 pounds
-30 pound deduction per drop
-Ending weight = 45 pounds
-Each weight done to failure

Yeah, I may seem weak, but keep in mind that I did all sets to failure and pushed all of them way beyond failure by adding drops, negatives and massive cheating. I'm never gonna do this again in a long time.


Most evil routine:

  1. Kick a puppy.
  2. Steal a little girls bike
  3. Kill Santa.
  4. Vote republican.
  5. Klan meeting
  6. Spam T-Nation forums
  7. Beat up a blind person and ask him why he cant be more like Daredevil.


A1. Cleans
A2. Clean & Press (80% RM)
A3. Clean & Front Squat

B1. Back Squats 10X3
B2. Overhead Squats 3X5

C1. Snatch-Grip DL from a platform 2X7
C2. Romanian DL 1X7


D1. Dumbbell Military Press
D2. Barbell Military Press
D3. Face Pulls
D4. Full Contact Twist

I do this routine as intensely as possible, with as little rest as possible, jumping from excercise to excercise. I'm not sure exactly how "evil" this is compared to others, but I do it regularly (once a week) and it never ceases to kick my ass and leave me sore for the entire week to follow.


Post of the year.


Squat rack curls.




That IS evil.


no weight lifting routine is as bad as practicing 400m sprints with 45 sec rest.


I used to trained with Jesse Kellum one summer and puked every morning five days a week.




FOR TWO HOURS STARIGHT, while reading a magazine.


It looks like you developed a conscience after doing all that evil stuff and decided to do the right thing.


60 yard sprints. 30 yards with a 100 pound sled then drop the straps and sprint out the last 30 yards. That was the closest I have ever came to throwing up while training. It was also around 100 degrees outside at the time. The supersquats program was kind of brutal as well. There's nothing quite like having a few hundred pounds on your back for 3+ minutes.


Well said.


in a 25m pool, doing 6x50 on the 1:00, than 6x50 on the :59, than 6x50 on the :58...until you couldn't make more than three. I got down to 28 or 29 seconds. Sucked. Weight lifting afterwards sucked as well.


Doing 100 yard free sprints to get out of practice. You took your best time, added 5-10 seconds to it, and it was on a point system. I.E. best time with added seconds was :51, you went a 1:01, got 10 points. A 1:02 got 9..etc... 20 Points to leave practice. Sucked.


Using dumbells, one hand at a time.


Agreed. Well played, sir.