T Nation

Young Men and the Struggle for Dominance


#1

It's said that when a man gets married or at least finds a mate, his T levels go down to match his partner more and hers perhaps go up a little.

Now, evolutionarily speaking, all male struggle in different fields from the fine arts to bodybuilding or engineering etc. is supposed to make him stand out and win him respect and status among the human herd and ultimately attract females. There are many ways to stand out from the pack. The human is built simple enough so that even a finest mind will ultimately derive pleasure from things similar to the thicker portion of the dense.

Now, even if one is single (and not counting those with strategies opposed to any commitment) I think there's a switch in a man's head where, when he does something well and even if it's a homosocial enviroment like lifting that women don't directly care about, he will feel better about himself over having won respect and status within a subpopulation and an enviroment which encourages him to feel more powerful and dominant and to feel like he has a better shot. Even if he was in jail or locked to some catholic monastery. He has a feeling of having potential and is not dwelling in the mental and emotional state of loserdom with low T and low ambitions. He has a strong instinctual feeling that his seed is worthy and only waiting for the right moment to be unloaded.
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This kind of ties into the whole "be social and network with people and women trust you more" thing and it does not have to even include women. Having male 'allies' is a step forwards.

So I was kind of thinking about how often are women like lifeboats during various kinds of failure where a man will fall back on a "Oh well, at least I have her love" or whatever kind of 'excuse' to feel better about himself during a lapse of depression or any kind of perceived failure. Could this cause laziness in things such as lifting? Do you mellow out?

Now, personally, I'm kind of divided. I'll be 25 next monday and quite virginal. Neither do I have many friends, none that I regularly see although I like to think that I'm a pretty easy person to be with and active to establish shallow friendships. I have stayed at roughly the same weight for soon to be three years which feels a bit demoralizing, and hardly noticeably leaner than back in 2010. I like to fall back on thinking that it does not make that big of a difference and being alone, I don't have to look that sharp. Back in 2008, I dropped 15kg+ as I there seemed to be such a moment but it passed. So I lost a lot of water, flab and probably muscle and never got as fat again. I don't want to sound like a bitching martyr although I do see myself as a little bit of a martyr. I don't have much energy and I also try to work very hard on flexibility which is hard as I had the back injury and cannot really lift or bend nearly enough now. The clock ticks and getting more limber gets more agonizing year after year. Other than family, I don't have many people around appreciating time that I put in especially as a lot of time and effort ultimately is partially wasted over diet habits or other setbacks. I have cravings for recognition(s) and each of such commentaries is what fuels my fire despite any odds, rare as it is. Other than visuals in my head.

I guess the point of this thread is between the lines and I hope someone spoofs this too.


#2

Just to let you know, 99% of people reading this are thinking "What the fuck is this guy trying to say?" haha. I cant distinguish what the point of this post was from all the other junk in there, so maybe you should try and be a little more "to the point" if you are really looking for an answer to some question.


#3

My T levels dropped twelve points just reading that. Do you have a male role model in your life? I feel you analyze things too much, so set a goal and achieve that goal. If that works and gives you a shred of self-esteem or motivation, do it again and again and again.

Repeat until you are the President of Finland. Chicks will dig it. Because Prime Minister is a gay position anyway.


#4

This is the same guy who stated that there were no funny comedians that he has ever seen...the same guy who is apparently offended by my "attitude" on the forum.

It really doesn't surprise me about the lack of friends thing. That "holier than thou" state of mind can't be too big of a hit at parties.

You need to work on your writing skills. I doubt most people will waste the time trying to decipher that post enough to do a parody of it.


#5

Can you post more of that figure skater in your avatar, perhaps in even more compromising positions? (ie: "post-wipeout doggie style" or "legs spread, trying to stand back up")


#6

If all you're looking for is some validation that you're trying hard (but don't have anyone to share your lack of results with) than start posting progress pics regularly.

I think that's what you were getting at.


#7

What the fuck is this bullshit?


#8

do you expect people to read all of that?


#9

Ha, works for me! :smiley:

Seriously though, you guys fret much too much about manliness, masculinity and all that crap. I fret too, I realize, about if I should avoid more size here or there and what have you for similar concerns about femininity, but I know that's just my own insecurity and it's a mistake to try and extrapolate some larger pattern about society and evolution based on my own neurotic behavior. I suggest you realize that too.


#10

hey who cares man? Stop struggling


#11

Didn't make a point, really. At first it looked like social commentary, then it diverged into self-pacifying. But what can we say? Work harder, stay diligent and you should improve your physique. That should help your confidence which should transfer over to more friends and some chicks, in theory. Or you could work on people skills, I'm sure there's some books out there, become more comfortable with your failures and try to gain a healthier self-image.

Point: Instead of waiting for the confidence to come through accomplishments, take charge and fix your shit up, WHILE working on your accomplishments.


#12

Read it, did not comprehend it.

Vash summed it up nicely.


#13

Perfect example, Gentlemen. Even though she's wrong in every way possible, just nod your head and say "Yes, Dear". Unless its truly an argument worth winning, let the crazy one win.

To Debra: Yes, Dear. Whatever you say.


#14

i didn't even try to read it, am glad vash summarized it so well.


#15

Aw thank you Wol :slight_smile:


#16

Hook, Line, and Sinker


#17

haha but who is the fish?


#18

grow a large moustache, then you will be a man.


#19

This.

Also, foam roll.


#20

1.) Go to kitchen
2.) Grab knife
3.) Insert firmly into abdomen
4.) Rinse and repeat