T Nation

You Know You're Asian When

Hi! It was Mid Autumn Festival yesterday and I thought I’d throw in some pride:

  1. your car has some thing hanging from the rearview mirror
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  2. You’ve taken at least 1 advanced math class outside of school

  3. Rice is Life (at least for your parents/relatives)

  4. Meat is synonymous with pork (肉=猪肉)

  5. People have stared at your for your love of “strange foods”- pickled chicken feet, stinky tofu, 老干妈。。。

  6. There’s a perpetual collection of plastic bags storied somewhere

  7. The dishwasher is for storing dishes, not washing them

  8. Lucky/unlucky numbers have influenced at least 1 important life decision

@alex_yu @dt79 Anything else to add?

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  1. You don’t look forward to weekends because those classes are harder than school

  2. What’s an allowance?

  3. A is average

  4. What’s “I love you”

  5. “Medium rare” is food poisoning

  6. Hot water / tea

  7. (Maybe just me) Being grounded as punishment is one of the better options

  8. What’s “I’m impressed / good job”

*9. Weightlifting stunts growth

*老干妈is not strange

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YES! Calc BC in Junior year was literally the 1st time I went into math class NOT knowing at least 80% of the content

I’m struggling with this one. My parents had a bad habit of spoiling me by just handing me cash whenever I “needed it” instead of actually giving me an allowance to budget.

YES! and in the SHANGHAI SUMMER too!

Yep! Corporal punishment was huge. I remember hiding all the clothes hangers to avoid the threat of getting hit. I’m the lucky one- my mom realized that beating me was useless a couple years ago. My brother and dad still get the rod (broomstick) on occasion

That was my parents throughout elementary school. The scary thing is that by MS, they’d already brainwashed me to think that for myself. By HS, they were telling ME not to get worried over a B

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Ha! I can’t believe I missed this one!

See I had the habit of trying to defend myself so hitting puberty pretty much put a stop to this

Haha hell would freeze over first

Forgot some

  1. Cold things are bad for your stomach (and salty + sweet together)
  2. Cold things are bad in general
  3. Your parents (or your, in China) liquor of choice is 白酒
  4. Med school or lawyer

白酒is the life of parties. My grandma was famous for her drinking abilities. My grandpa once organized a drinking competition between my dad and uncle (before I was born). My uncle ended up with a permanent stomach ulcer

Christ

I never really got this though. It’s hard to put down (at least the 53+ stuff). Wine on the other hand I can get through a bottle at dinner

I got lucky with alcohol genetics as my dad can down 7 (wine)glasses of 白酒 and not be too f-ed up while my mom can’t process any alcohol

  1. You know at least one relative that is very good at drinking and one that is very bad

yep! My grandma used to be able to put down nearly a L of 白酒 but my uncle (mom’s side) can barely put down a glass (50ml)

  1. you’ve lost track of all the terms for relatives (姑姑, 姨妈,舅舅,叔叔,伯伯,舅妈,姨奶奶。。。。)

It’s “have you eaten yet?”

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So what does it mean when they say you eat too damn much? :laughing:

Means you’re hoarding all the love and your siblings are getting less LOL

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It’s amusing how we’re not supposed to say certain sterotypes because they’re rude, but really, they’re often stereotypes for a reason - everything about grades and lack of voicing loving emotions is stuff I’ve heard, but didn’t actually just go around assuming was true of any Asians I knew.

My parents/aunt & uncles and their friends all grew up in the late 80’s and 90’s in our town. At the time it was mostly whites and some Natives and Latinos, with very few blacks or Asians. There was one Asian kid my family is still friends with. I don’t know for sure how to spell his name, but I think it’s Siyot. Or Sayot. I believe he’s Thai. Teachers and classmates never knew how to say his name so he ended up just being known as “Asian” lol and still goes by it to this day. I don’t think he minds, but it’s pretty hilarious to me. He also has a tattoo that says “Made in Thailand”.

I want one on the back of my neck that says “made in China”. The only thing stopping me is the lack of fat there (way more pain) and career aspirations

Why the back of your neck? If you wore your hair down I bet most people wouldn’t see it - so for like a job interview or something.

I think I might get my first one soon here. My cousin’s dad opened a tattoo shop recently and he’s pretty professional and talented. The other ones are…gross. Pretty much sums it up.

I think I’d get it on my forearm, but I haven’t decided yet. I don’t plan on being at a job where tattoos wouldn’t be approved of - like a big corporate setting or anything, so I don’t see it being an issue. I also think a lot more people are becoming more relaxed about piercings and tattoos but I suppose it depends.

Because that’s where shirt tags are

ouch. My lit teacher has a full sleeve on both arms and he said the forearms were the worst. Apparently more tendon = more painful

Oh that’s clever. I wouldn’t have thought of that.

Uh oh.

yeah. Apparently, a thick layer of fat is what reduces pain since there’s no nerve endings. Muscle and tendon are pretty bad, but skin on bone is the worse. I obviously don’t have experience, but I’ve had more than a few conversations with that lit teacher who in addition to the 2 full sleeves, has most of his back covered too. I think that’s enough experience for 3 people

Ever seen a middle aged white man not put his hands on his hips while he watches the freshly mowed lawn get watered?

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I’m from a more traditional Chinese background.

  1. A haggis-loving Scotsman won’t go near your favorite dish. (Lol @Yogi1 where have you been?)

  2. You get smacked at the dinner table when you put your elbows in the table.

  3. You have to tell the others at the table to eat one by one in order of rank.

  4. Your dad told you that if you point at the moon, the Moon Goddess will cut off your ear.

  5. When you heard the term “Secular Buddhism”, you had to look it up.

  6. You’ve thrown a pregnant cat over the coffin at a funeral because old people told you that the dead person will turn into a zombie. Probably just me.

  7. Your house turns into a gambling den for a couple of days during the Lunar New Year.

  8. This will also happen at your funeral.

  9. Your wife spends the whole day making herbal soup because it’s “healthy”. Then she serves it to you with 3 other dishes submerged in oil. And the soup gives you a nosebleed.

  10. The only herbal soup you actually like turns out to be the one for menopausel women that your wife made for your mother.

  11. Tuppleware jokes are mostly accurate.

  12. You’ve trolled a Traditional Chinese Medicine student by asking her to open your ren and du meridians. Probably just me again.

  13. You couldn’t sit through the Dragonball Z live action movie because Chow Yun Fat was your childhood hero.

  14. You have no idea why people keep making a big deal out of the words “dao”(Tao) and “qi”. There are almost a hundred variations and combinations of these words.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Z1mDDjhwrb4

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you bet!

ginseng will do that

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