T Nation

You Know You're a Powerlifter When...


#1

Ive seen these before and they always make me smile....
ill put a couple and everyone just keep adding!

you know your a powerlfter

you get a headache and a bloody nose from tying your shoes
you have huge arms and small biceps
you are extremely fuscular ( fucular is a large amount of muscle mass covered in fat)


#2

oh fun times...

when you:

Actually Compete

use chains and band more often than not

Squat in chucks

Chalk your back before a squat

Actually own and use PL gear

Have Ginny Phillips # in your Cell Phone contacts [I guess even knowing who that is sort of qualifies you]

Dozens more I cannot think of now


#3

Plan business trips according to what big gyms are in the area

Get excited by popped blood vessels

220's and below are the little guys


#4

When it is mentally painful to use high reps.


#5

...when you own more polyester suits than Disco Stu
...whenyou stock up on Pedialyte even though you don't have kids
...when your wife asks if you liked the dinner she cooked, you respond by giving her 3 white lights
...when you eat during your workout
...when u consider high reps to be anything above 4
...when you are constantly looking for a gym bag big enough to store all your gear


#6

I lol'd ALOT at that one.


#7

yousmile when people wonder what you do with all those ammonia caps in your bag


#8

This is a great list. I have been known to eat a Little Debby in the middle of a deadlift workout. My lightweight teammates hate Pedialyte because they say it makes them thirstier after they drink it than they were before. I don't see the problem. Ditto the rep work. I'll add a few:

...when you get a bicep cramp from talking on the cell phone for more than two minutes.

...when you're worried your hands may be getting too fat for deadlifts.

...if you can only eat a chicken breast if it's covered in mayonnaise.

...you have more chalk and baby powder than an octogenarian school teacher.


#9

When Powerliftingwatch.com is your morning comedy dose.
When you dream of Ginny Phillips modifying your suits but have to settle with a local cobbler.
You start calling depth on deadlifts.
Giving verbal ques during sex.
Have a seperate drawer in your dresser for meet t-shirts.
You can redlight squats just by hearing the federation.


#10

You're a powerlifter when:

You love the blood running down your shins, which had just healed from you last deadlift work out.

You admire the fresh marks left by your new bench shirt.

You tell the story of how you ripped all of the flesh from your hand on your last deadlift, and how you super glued it back on.

George


#11

when you can give people advice from your own experience and not article.

when you lift enough weight that people stop giving you advice at the gym.


#12

When you show people your hands an they tell you to get gloves and you just laugh.


#13

..you own ballet slippers and aren't accused of being gay


#14

You hook grip your grocery bags.

You mow your lawn with a mixed grip.

You can't count over 3, but you can multiply by 45 in your head.

You have the biggest quads in your gym... and the smallest calves.

You check your depth while taking a dump.

You've asked for a weight by colors ("gimme 3 reds and a blue")

You've dropped something and gone to pick it up... in a sumo stance.

You've used a home depot card to buy training equipment.

You understand my screenname/licenseplate.


#15

When you rack pull a solid 35# PR from your nemesis pin, feel a slight tweak in your back over your right hip, but feel good otherwise and decide what the hell let's do some heavy 3x3's on stiff legs and end up hobbling around for 3 days wondering why you haven't learned better yet.


#16

These are fantastic.

When you never go anywhere without a sack, bag, or cooler of food.


#17

You're having sex and think..."hrm this will help teach me to pull my hips through better."


#18

You look up to men that are the biggest and hairest freaks on the planet.

Every two hours you have to eat something, it doesn't matter what, you just have to eat.

You become almost homicidal if someone calls you a bodybuilder.

You hate cardio and wish that no one ever invented a stair master.


#19

I always do the depth check while taking a dump... I'm a freak


#20

Oh God I laughed my ass off at this one.