T Nation

Worst Gifts From Significant Others Ever


#1

so this is a bit of a spin off of my "worst dating moments ever" thread. but these things tend to be funny as hell.

So I was dating this girl like a year ago, she lived 2 floors above me in my apartment building (bad idea btw). So she had this really old school george foreman grill (im talking like 1st generation old school missing the grease trap, cord covered in electrical tape, the works) that I'd cook dinner for us on all the time, she was always telling me how she couldn't cook and it was just wasting space yadayadayada....so i told her that if she wanted id take it downstairs and keep it in my place since i love cooking. So fast forward 2 months, It's my birthday, and she comes downstairs with this monster of a package (horribly wrapped might i add) so I start to get excited, until she hands it to me. I shit you not I could feel the excess grease dripping through the wrapping paper.

So I opened it, this chick wrapped up this old ass hand me down foreman grill, and the worst part was that she didn't even bother to clean it, it still had the remains of the dinner we had eaten the day before caked on the inside! needless to say we aren't together anymore......and it also stopped working like a month after that too


#2

OP.. good one!

My ex-wife was notoriously cheap about gifts. It was my birthday and I asked for a pair of jackstands for working on my car. I showed her the ones I wanted, steel, made in the USA, etc.

What do I get? ONE stamped-steel jackstand that I wouldn't use on a dare. That was one of the first things that got chucked after the divorce.

Rob


#3

that shit drives me nuts! A woman will ask you what gift you want and you can physically SHOW her, and she will still by the wrong thing and be like "this is was you wanted isn't it?", then when she wants that 300$ purse at macy's and you find the exact same purse for $250 at jc pennys, you'd think you'd just killed the pope by her reaction "I told you I wanted the one from Macy's....RAWR RAWR RAWR!" LMAO....gotta love the women tho


#4

If you really want to see how good your woman is at spotting fake or replacement items as gifts, just buy something from the Chinese black market.


#5

The funny thing about that is that they'll buy the Chinese knock-off stuff on their own... but if you do it, you clearly don't love or appreciate them.


#6

or just a tight wad lmao.....


#7

For our first Christmas together I got my partner about $500US worth od stuff...all kinds of things....I kid you not she got me a towel.


#8

A pair of Winny the fucking Pooh socks from an ex. She was into Disney... I moved on.


#9

I was dating this Jewish girl for a short while. Her birthday and the holidays were very close together. I get $100 of roses sent to her office at work for her birthday. We celebrated Xmas, I got her a Springsteen box set she wanted and a $100 gift certificate to a favorite store of hers.

What does she get me? This large chocolate Xmas tree... I'm nice and say thank you. On my way home, I open the Xmas tree... had to be the stalest and cheapest chocolate on the planet. It went out the window on the parkway.

Rob


#10

I'm a little surprised no one has said herpes yet.

I'll check back.


#11

i was just about to.
it was worth it if anybody wants to know


#12

Well, duh. That's the kind of small gift you give for Channuka, which she equated with your holiday.

That, or she just wasn't into you.


#13

Only part of me was into her, so that works. I wish she would have given me a dradle, at least I can start the fireplace up with that.

Rob


#14

When I was in 7th grade, I was dating this girl and for Christmas I got her a monkey bracelet, I spent like $50 on it, which was a good bit of money in those days.

She got me a LeAnne Rimes "How Do I Live" single cassette tape.


#15

I took my then-girlfriend to Europe for a whole month, saw the Netherlands, Paris, and all over Italy.

I paid for EVERYTHING, plane tix, hotels, rental car, you name it.

What did she get me ?... A croissant that cost 2 Euros.


#16

This is why my wife and I determine a dollar amount we can spend and buy our own gifts. We even did that while we were dating and gave each other the money. She wouldn't know a jackstand from a screwdriver and I wouldn't know a Coach bag from a grocery sack, so if we get our own we have no issues.


#17

She was from Dutch ancestry?


#18

Upon visual inspection, one is clearly more useful than the other one. So when in doubt, pick the one that looks useless, and you'll be the proud owner of a new Coach bag.


#19

lol oh man


#20

Know why women do this shit? Cus they learn from chicks who buy expensive gifts for their man like guns, top end climbing gear, monogrammed sheepskin leather wallets only to get fucked. Or not fucked enough.