T Nation

Why I Do This Shit


i'm turning 32 on valentine's day. it's not a real problem for me - the age thing isn't.

nonetheless as i see another year piling on, i begin to stock of some of the things i'm still doing, some of the things i've stopped doing, and some of the things i met yet do.

two things i do to this very day are work out and fight.

what's interesting, tho, is how my reasons for doing them have changed.

the core reason, it seems, is the same.

but all the superfluous, stupid, image reasons have fallen away.

i used to box because i didn't want to be pushed around.

i used to wrestle because guys in high school were plenty happy to fight 2 and 3 on 1. and i really didn't know how to back down. and i was a little guy, too.

now i like to wrestle and box because i like the GAMES. i like to PLAY. and i like to watch things grow.

and i like to lift because it is MINE. it cannot be TAXED or TAKEN AWAY. the work i do (like most people) for a living is BULLSHIT and hardly pays a LIVING WAGE and i live very simply. my relationships will rise and fall, none of them will be permanent, and so i will lose each of them. but what remains mine?

this crap that is me. this breathing, walking turd that thinks it knows something.

that's why i work out.

i steal a bit back for me.

i'm the underdog. everything is mounted against me. coporations, spouses, real estate, governement.. you name it. its hard to be the little guy.

but at the rack, i steal it fucking back.

i do something to help ensure that i can control the 3 foot of space that surrounds me if i have to. to push myself out of it if not to push someone else out of it.

and that is the lowest set of bricks on the pyramid and also the widest.

i steal it back.

i play these games.

It's mine.


preach it for the little guys!



You sound like a very well-rounded individual. A true renaissance man.

you like to watch things grow??? What kind of wrestling are you talking about?

That explains the missing rack at my old gym. Here I was thinking they removed it for insurance reasons.

Harrrr. A pirate's life for me, yo ho.
I hope things get better for you.



dollarbill is a insane nut.


I've been a long time viewer of this website but have never posted anything until this. It's really interesting what you've written. I think I get where you're coming from. What I wondered is, what would you do if you lost your health, that is, you could no longer lift weights or fight? This is always a possibility and a reason to invest plenty of time into relationships that will outlast your health. Too much independence could make for a very lonely and unahappy retirement.


Ok, I'm slightly worried. When you wrestle these other guys, actually what is it that grows?


While relationships are important, men were created for the conquest! If your health fades you just change the conquest, but it must always be there for a man to be truly fulfilled. That and good poon!


Most people never figure that stuff out for themselves. Keep doing what you're doing. You got it all figured out.


This is a classic example of the whole "T-man mindset" bs that is out of control. Just shut up and lift. And if you wanna box, do it.

Leave the poetry to the poets.

Leave the comedy to the comedians and Dollarbill.






If your job is bullshit change it. Don't let the comfort of standing still overtake you.

And there's nothing wrong with waxing poetic. Hell, 80% of everything I say is in the form of mild poetry. I'm an idealist.


a valentine's birthday ...

now THAT's not gay or anything


A V-D BDay! sweet! Just imagine, its valentines day and your woman is nagging you, "Buy me flowers. Take me to dinner. Massage my feet." He can legally say "Listen, woman. Its my birthday. That cancels out your day. So sorry. I am going to play nintendo and drink beer."