T Nation

White Undies? WTF?

Off Topic
#1

OK this may be a little weired and quite frankly I din’t even want to post it but I figured someone might have some knowledge or maybe someone will get a laugh out of it.

I own one pair of white boxer briefs, I either buy black or grey only but had a pair bought for me for chistmas or something. The reason I don’t wear white undies? They stain plain and simple. especially if you work out in them and your butt sweats.

Ok well now here is the real dilema. For the past several months I have not been sick once. However I have worn these white boxers approx 5-7 times in that time period and every single time I wear them I get the runs. Like serious squirts and all. The day before… nothing, the day after… nice solid poops. WTF what gives with this, is this some subconsious mind trick i’m playing on myself? Should I burn them immediately in a protest to runny poop? Is there a possible allergic reaction to the bleached fabric rubbing my nuts?

Well there ya have it sick and twisted.

Vegita ~ Prince of all Sayajins

#2

Undoubtedly one of the bravest posts I have ever read.

Jason

#3

I gotta agree with dookie on this one.

Anyways, this post makes me ask a few things.

  1. Why would you not have thrown those away long long ago? Even if they were a present who are you going to offend? Like anybody is actually going to ask “Hey man, did you like the gotch I bought you? Can I see how it looks on you? See how it accentuates the package? Yeah I was thinking of you when I picked those babies out.” Its not gonna happen.

2)Are you sleeping in this underwear? If so then the next morning poop would be horrible. Wait… don’t answer that one.

3)HAVE YOU NO SELF RESPECT??? Old people wear white underwear, old people with saggy man boobs, moobs. Boys wear underwear with spaceships or cartoon characters on them. Men wear classy underwear, nice fitting so they don’t ride, possibly even a silk pair for that extra comfort and style. Maybe even no underwear at all, but that can be risky. I myself combine, Manly boxers… with cartoon characters on them.

4)How many pairs of underwear do you own if you can safely say that you have worn them 5-7 times over the span of several months? Or is it that you reuse?
Monday- undies day one, regular wearing
Tuesday-undies day two, backwards wearing
Wednesday-undies day three, inside out wearing
Thursday-Undies final day, inside out & backwards wearing.

See thats just wrong man.

Dave

#4

Bwhahhaahahahahahaha!!! Short Dave you rule

#5

While I can’t comment on the “white undies dilemma”, I can agree that Short Dave is a hoot. Funny stuff.

#6

Dude! The same thing happens to me when I wear white boxer briefs!

#7

Okay. I was lying. I don’t even own any. Although I do admire Vegita for coming up with what might be one of the most… original… topics ever.

#8

How did you manage to relate the undies to the runs? Good God, I hope it wasn’t from the stains. If it was, maybe you get the runs in the darker drawers also, but don’t notice the skidmarks.

#9

I solve the problem by only choosing to wear thongs. Or if at all possible…commando. No underwear…no problems. Hakuna Matata carried out to its logical conclusion.

#10

[quote]tiffy wrote:
I solve the problem by only choosing to wear thongs. Or if at all possible…commando. No underwear…no problems. Hakuna Matata carried out to its logical conclusion.[/quote]

tiffy,

yeah, thongs, definitely!
But what if they’re white…? :wink:

Makkun

#11

No stains, WTF I do have hygene ;). I noticed because everytime my poop felt like water running out of my butt, I would notice that the boxerbriefs around my ankles were white.

The reason I havn’t thrown them out before is because I only slowly noticed the connection. It started out as… I better make sure to wipe extra good and maybe even get a wet one to finish with. To why the hell do I keep having the runs with these goddamn white undies on. To could the white undies be causing the runs?

See simple chain of events and thought pattern. I cant really afford to go commando because I wear nice thin dress pants to work every day and if I happened to get a semi or worse a full fledged boner, I would surley not be able to disguise it. Even loose fitting boxers don’t seem to hold the wood under raps well enough unless i’m wearing a heavier material like blue jeans.

Anyways, I knew this would be a bit of a self denegrating topic, but what the hell. It’s an internet forum, and it’s funny when other people do it.

Vegita ~ Prince of all Sayajins

#12

???

#13

Veg, you kill me. I think you should be poster of the week or something. No shit! :slight_smile:

#14

This has got to be one of the funniest threads ever. Mostly because I can’t help but hear Vegeta’s gravelly, rage-filled cartoon voice saying it.

Go ahead… read the post again with that in mind and see if you don’t crack up.

#15

Self denegrating humor seemed to work for the guys on the blue collar comedy tour. I have plenty of stories to tell that would make a grown sumo wrestler blush. Actually I’m sure everyone does but I’m not afraid to post them.

Vegita ~ Prince of all Sayajins