What to Tell Sons about Girls

A flip side thread (re: what to tell daughters about boys). Not really geared as a how to discuss sex with your kid, but rather, exampling the not so sexual questions that might arise. For example, why do girls do _______?

Aww…that’s sweet of you (i read the other thread).

I have nothing to offer. I simply ask that all parents please, PLEASE teach their sons to clean around the house and not piss all over the bathroom (also to properly wipe their ass). Oh, and cook a meal or two - nothing beats a man who cooks. Also, teach them the art of looking at other women surreptitiously when walking down street with their lady.

And by the time your perfect sons grow up they’ll be just the right age for me. Thanks!

ps. yes PMS is real, and yes, they will have to grin and bear it.

I just had this convo with my son(18) yesterday who has been dating the same girl for over a year now.

He asked for it,I finally put it to him and didn’t beat around the bush. “Boy, I thinks she a passive/aggresive neurotic girl with daddy issues and if you think you would be the first guy to ever have his girlfriend get herself preggos to keep her man you sir are an idiot”.

I like her but he could do way better as superficial as that sounds. His girl buddies all tell him if he wasen’t taken they would bone the shit out of him lol.

Spitters are quitters boyo, remember that.

PIIHB.

You know, to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

Tell them that a butterface is just as good.

Its like finding a bad ass shirt that has been drastically marked down because of a small hole in the armpit.

  1. Dont ass to mouth with your main girl…I mea, you don’t eat the ashes of of an ashtray do you?

As a father of a 33yr old daughter, two boys 27 & 18, I told them to remember three things.

Believe in themselves.

Respect their mother.

Manners/Common courtesy.

All will fall into place if they abide by these three simple things. It doesn’t matter if you’re raising a daughter or a son.

As for telling the boys how to treat girls, I told them to think about if someone ever put their Mother in a bad light. How would that make them feel? So far “shitz” worked.

Never trust anything that bleeds for four straight days and doesn’t die.

[quote]Mascherano wrote:
Aww…that’s sweet of you (i read the other thread).

I have nothing to offer.
[/quote]

I fixed your post.

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

teach their sons to find a good woman that will clean around the house and wipe up their piss in the bathroom (sand if necessary, to to properly wipe their ass). Oh, and be sure she can cook, nothing is more like a life sentence of hard labor than a woman that can’t or won’t cook. Also, teach them to find a confident woman with self-esteem so that they can look at other women walking down the street like every other man in the world.

ps. teach them that yes, PMS is real, and no, they don’t have to put up with that irrational shit.
[/quote]

I fixed your post again. This is becoming a full time job. Whaddya say you stop posting and let me catch my breath?

When you take her panties off, throw them against the wall - if they stick, get the hell outta there!

Two things: Bitches be crazy and Bros before Hoes

i would introduce him to this guy.

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

teach their sons to find a good woman that will clean around the house and wipe up their piss in the bathroom (sand if necessary, to to properly wipe their ass). Oh, and be sure she can cook, nothing is more like a life sentence of hard labor than a woman that can’t or won’t cook. Also, teach them to find a confident woman with self-esteem so that they can look at other women walking down the street like every other man in the world.

ps. teach them that yes, PMS is real, and no, they don’t have to put up with that irrational shit.
[/quote]

I fixed your post again. This is becoming a full time job. Whaddya say you stop posting and let me catch my breath?[/quote]

LOL! I’m glad you moved to Jersey. One less douche bag in NYC. Thanks for the editing!

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

teach their sons to find a good woman that will clean around the house and wipe up their piss in the bathroom (sand if necessary, to to properly wipe their ass). Oh, and be sure she can cook, nothing is more like a life sentence of hard labor than a woman that can’t or won’t cook. Also, teach them to find a confident woman with self-esteem so that they can look at other women walking down the street like every other man in the world.

ps. teach them that yes, PMS is real, and no, they don’t have to put up with that irrational shit.
[/quote]

I fixed your post again. This is becoming a full time job. Whaddya say you stop posting and let me catch my breath?[/quote]

LOL! I’m glad you moved to Jersey. One less douche bag in NYC. Thanks for the editing! [/quote]

If you’re attractive, it IS quite possible that we have slept together and you of course may know me as your post above implies. However, I assure you sugar britches that I have never resided in NYC and I have never been a “douchebag”. But send me your picture and let me see if it jogs my memory.

[quote]print wrote:
As a father of a 33yr old daughter, two boys 27 & 18, I told them to remember three things.

Believe in themselves.

Respect their mother.

Manners/Common courtesy.

All will fall into place if they abide by these three simple things. It doesn’t matter if you’re raising a daughter or a son.

As for telling the boys how to treat girls, I told them to think about if someone ever put their Mother in a bad light. How would that make them feel? So far “shitz” worked.[/quote]

OMG, you have a daughter older than me?

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[/quote]

I fixed your post again. This is becoming a full time job. Whaddya say you stop posting and let me catch my breath?[/quote]

LOL! I’m glad you moved to Jersey. One less douche bag in NYC. Thanks for the editing! [/quote]

If you’re attractive, it IS quite possible that we have slept together and you of course may know me as your post above implies. However, I assure you sugar britches that I have never resided in NYC and I have never been a “douchebag”. But send me your picture and let me see if it jogs my memory. [/quote]

Ah, for some reason I thought you were a new yorker. In that case, carry on.

As for whether i’m attractive? There’s a reason my avi only shows me from my neck down - the face only an equestrian would love.

[quote]Mascherano wrote:
As for whether i’m attractive? There’s a reason my avi only shows me from my neck down - the face only an equestrian would love.

[/quote]
This made me LOL. Thanks Masch. Have a carrot :wink:

[quote]Grneyes wrote:

[quote]print wrote:
As a father of a 33yr old daughter, two boys 27 & 18, I told them to remember three things.

Believe in themselves.

Respect their mother.

Manners/Common courtesy.

All will fall into place if they abide by these three simple things. It doesn’t matter if you’re raising a daughter or a son.

As for telling the boys how to treat girls, I told them to think about if someone ever put their Mother in a bad light. How would that make them feel? So far “shitz” worked.[/quote]

OMG, you have a daughter older than me?[/quote]

Did we not already go through this?

At least you don’t have Alzheimers.

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Mascherano wrote:

[/quote]

I fixed your post again. This is becoming a full time job. Whaddya say you stop posting and let me catch my breath?[/quote]

LOL! I’m glad you moved to Jersey. One less douche bag in NYC. Thanks for the editing! [/quote]

If you’re attractive, it IS quite possible that we have slept together and you of course may know me as your post above implies. However, I assure you sugar britches that I have never resided in NYC and I have never been a “douchebag”. But send me your picture and let me see if it jogs my memory. [/quote]

Ah, for some reason I thought you were a new yorker. In that case, carry on.

As for whether i’m attractive? There’s a reason my avi only shows me from my neck down - the face only an equestrian would love.

[/quote]

you have a good and appropriate sense of humor. i like you :slight_smile:

[quote]imhungry wrote:

[quote]Grneyes wrote:

[quote]print wrote:
As a father of a 33yr old daughter, two boys 27 & 18, I told them to remember three things.

Believe in themselves.

Respect their mother.

Manners/Common courtesy.

All will fall into place if they abide by these three simple things. It doesn’t matter if you’re raising a daughter or a son.

As for telling the boys how to treat girls, I told them to think about if someone ever put their Mother in a bad light. How would that make them feel? So far “shitz” worked.[/quote]

OMG, you have a daughter older than me?[/quote]

Did we not already go through this?

At least you don’t have Alzheimers.[/quote]

LOL…I thought she was a year younger than me, not older. I mean…he had to have fathered her when he was 18 or something.