[quote]angry chicken wrote:
I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad that I have two boys.
Dustin, I thought about HH too! Buying your daughter sex toys FTMFW! LMAO
[/quote]
lulz! I couldn’t help it. That HH thread was the first thing I thought of.
[quote]BobParr wrote:
[quote]Yo Momma wrote:
Boys are stupid.[/quote]
This.
I told my daughter exactly this. She agreed and added that most of them are gross as well. I think this applies to boys her age (12). And, yes, I would have included myself in this at that age.[/quote]
x2
Also, let her listen to the old Love Line radio show from back in the day. I’d probably be pregnant and on welfare if it wasn’t for that show.
As for birth control, I wouldn’t put my daughter on anything with chemicals that early on, but I would give her all of the information about benefit-cost of each one and make sure she knew about the morning after pill (love line would be the better way of drilling this in her head. Nothing like an Adam Corolla rampage on the stupidity of youth to drive a concept home).
[quote]orion wrote:
The absolute truth.
Most men will do and say absolutely anything to get laid.
[/quote]
fixed your post
I have 4 daughters and I raised them pretty much by myself, although my parents helped. (My wife was killed when they were young, and I re-married all of a couple months ago.)
They are now 20, 19, 19 (twins), and my baby is 17. The eldest and one of the twins are combat medics. The eldest will attend an Ivy league school at the end of her stent. The other 19 also serves in a forward air position that I don’t want to say. Both of the twins will probably go to MIT. My baby is going to the IAF, and graduating with honors. No school yet.
Long story short, I am super full of pride with my girls. Smart, sweet, tough, and scary pretty. The all kind of look like Mila Kunis, if you want to know. They also will kill you, if need be.
We had a pretty serious religious household — I grew up Haredi (black hat orthodox), and raised my daughters what would be called “modern Orthodox” in the States
I was candid about twisting off when I was in the military and trying to have sex with basically any female that moved. I would lie, cheat, steal for pussy.
Then I met their mother (who happened to be a virgin, although it would not have mattered), and from that point on, I never willingly touched (as in, I didn’t shake hands) with a female not in my family. It was a commitment I made.
The male-female touch is amazingly powerful and to reserve that for your spouse alone creates an amazing intamacy.
Sex, much more so.
I raised them that sex is an amazing gift from G-d, that the best sex I ever had was with their mother, and to wait, if at all remotely possible.
I expect my eldest to be married shortly. They will go to college togehter — which I think is one of the mistakes Western countries make — waiting too damn long to get married and have kids.
So there you go. It’s the “old” way.
But I have 4 happy, well-adjusted, girls who hit near-perfect SAT scores — all of whom are productive citizens who serve their country, all college bound with bright futures.
So mock the old way if you want.
x2 on the book, it really opens your eyes to what is going on with our children. My daughter is nine, and I am not looking forward to that discussion. I think that was a key remark though, it should be a discussion, not a lecture. Right now she thinks sex is a bad word, which on the surface is funny and comforting(she thinks it is bad, so she won’t try it). But at the same time, I want her to understand that given the right context, sex is a great thing.
I’m starting to ramble. Seriously though, if you have a daughter, or if you just enjoy keeping up on social science, check out that book.
EDIT TO COMPLIMENT JEWBACCA: Awesome job with your girls, I can’t imagine trying to raise my two kids without their mother, let alone four girls. You can’t argue with old school parenting. It worked for generations, and then the boomers came in and ruined it for everyone. If you look at how society(in the States) has changed, it started with the love movement in the 60s. As soon as it was wrong to physically discipline your own children(and there is a HUGE difference between physical discipline from a loving parent and abuse), things went downhill. Now we have kids growing up with no respect for their elders, no manners, and no idea how to be men(or proper women, for that matter). Do I blame all of societies ills on lack of parental discipline? No, but I bet you can trace most of the current symptoms back to that root cause.
Boatguy, you made an interesting reference to the boomers. I can’t for the life of me remember where I read it, but at some point I read about the devastating and very overlooked effect that WWII had on American family life. Females had to work in factories to keep our armed forces equipped; it was the first time in our history that females worked, in large numbers, outside the home.
Many liked the new-found freedom of providing for themselves, and many families became dependent on the income of two earners. It was after this “revolution” that divorce rates began to skyrocket, as women now had a choice. I’m terrible at remembering details, but many societal problems are now traced to this beginning deterioration of the nuclear family.
[quote]Dustin wrote:
[quote]Tex Ag wrote:
I have been thinking about this lately. Although I have some time before this needs to be broached I thought it could be an interesting discussion. The age group I had in mind was 12 to 14 years old. A thread some time ago about how young is too young got me thinking about this some. Given girls are starting puberty even earlier than 12 and some guys here think puberty is a green light, well, it got me thinking of what to tell girls about boys who show interest.
So what would tell your daughters (current and/or future) about boys when it comes to relationships and sex?
Addendum: I think a thread about what to tell boys about girls would be interesting at a later date.[/quote]
I would ask Headhunter if I were you. He can give you some great advice on sex toys to buy your daughter.
Srsly.
[/quote]
What?! How the beep did I miss that thread?
Link please.
[quote]Jewbacca wrote:
I have 4 daughters and I raised them pretty much by myself, although my parents helped. (My wife was killed when they were young, and I re-married all of a couple months ago.)
They are now 20, 19, 19 (twins), and my baby is 17. The eldest and one of the twins are combat medics. The eldest will attend an Ivy league school at the end of her stent. The other 19 also serves in a forward air position that I don’t want to say. Both of the twins will probably go to MIT. My baby is going to the IAF, and graduating with honors. No school yet.
Long story short, I am super full of pride with my girls. Smart, sweet, tough, and scary pretty. The all kind of look like Mila Kunis, if you want to know. They also will kill you, if need be.
We had a pretty serious religious household — I grew up Haredi (black hat orthodox), and raised my daughters what would be called “modern Orthodox” in the States
I was candid about twisting off when I was in the military and trying to have sex with basically any female that moved. I would lie, cheat, steal for pussy.
Then I met their mother (who happened to be a virgin, although it would not have mattered), and from that point on, I never willingly touched (as in, I didn’t shake hands) with a female not in my family. It was a commitment I made.
The male-female touch is amazingly powerful and to reserve that for your spouse alone creates an amazing intamacy.
Sex, much more so.
I raised them that sex is an amazing gift from G-d, that the best sex I ever had was with their mother, and to wait, if at all remotely possible.
I expect my eldest to be married shortly. They will go to college togehter — which I think is one of the mistakes Western countries make — waiting too damn long to get married and have kids.
So there you go. It’s the “old” way.
But I have 4 happy, well-adjusted, girls who hit near-perfect SAT scores — all of whom are productive citizens who serve their country, all college bound with bright futures.
So mock the old way if you want.[/quote]
Your girls sound awesome.
There’s one other thing I’d tell your daughters:
Ass-to-mouth or it didn’t happen.
Steely’s point is important…it starts long before they are at the age where sex becomes a factor. Confidence, self-concept, values…all start early and play a role in later decisions. Also remember that she learns what a man is supposed to be and how a man is supposed to treat a woman from her father.
My daughter is twelve. She feels comfortable talking about sex related topics to both her mother and I, and that’s because we began that line of dialogue when she was about 10 years old.
It began by buying her a book about puberty for girls, something like this…
Later my wife found another resource in a television show that delves into these topics often…“Secret Life of the American Teenager”
The show is pretty corny, but it’s target market is teens/tweens, so of course my daughter likes watching it and really got into the story line. My wife used it as a reason to talk about different sex/relationship topics which perpetuated that dialogue that continues to this day.
There were many cringe moments in the beginning, but my wife persisted and explained the importance of talking about these things. It wasn’t long before the topics were no longer taboo.
I would echo the sentiment of talking about sex early and often. I distinctly remember having sex ed in kindergarten, in the context of tadpoles, from eggs to frogs.
When my girl met her first boyfriend (man her father was freaked out LOL) we had the serious discussion about birth control, STDs and first love.
FWIW, my father is the one who told me about the birds and the bees, only after he found out from my loud mouth cousin that I had all the facts wrong. So did she, but that’s what happens when the subject is not ever brought up. My Dad did a pretty good job, but I remember thinking that he looked like he’d rather be doing anything else than talking to me about sex LOL.
[quote]Tex Ag wrote:
I have been thinking about this lately. Although I have some time before this needs to be broached I thought it could be an interesting discussion. The age group I had in mind was 12 to 14 years old. A thread some time ago about how young is too young got me thinking about this some. Given girls are starting puberty even earlier than 12 and some guys here think puberty is a green light, well, it got me thinking of what to tell girls about boys who show interest.
So what would tell your daughters (current and/or future) about boys when it comes to relationships and sex?
Addendum: I think a thread about what to tell boys about girls would be interesting at a later date.[/quote]
Catholic School and love.
[quote]Jewbacca wrote:
I have 4 daughters and I raised them pretty much by myself, although my parents helped. (My wife was killed when they were young, and I re-married all of a couple months ago.)
They are now 20, 19, 19 (twins), and my baby is 17. The eldest and one of the twins are combat medics. The eldest will attend an Ivy league school at the end of her stent. The other 19 also serves in a forward air position that I don’t want to say. Both of the twins will probably go to MIT. My baby is going to the IAF, and graduating with honors. No school yet.
Long story short, I am super full of pride with my girls. Smart, sweet, tough, and scary pretty. The all kind of look like Mila Kunis, if you want to know. They also will kill you, if need be.
We had a pretty serious religious household — I grew up Haredi (black hat orthodox), and raised my daughters what would be called “modern Orthodox” in the States
I was candid about twisting off when I was in the military and trying to have sex with basically any female that moved. I would lie, cheat, steal for pussy.
Then I met their mother (who happened to be a virgin, although it would not have mattered), and from that point on, I never willingly touched (as in, I didn’t shake hands) with a female not in my family. It was a commitment I made.
The male-female touch is amazingly powerful and to reserve that for your spouse alone creates an amazing intamacy.
Sex, much more so.
I raised them that sex is an amazing gift from G-d, that the best sex I ever had was with their mother, and to wait, if at all remotely possible.
I expect my eldest to be married shortly. They will go to college togehter — which I think is one of the mistakes Western countries make — waiting too damn long to get married and have kids.
So there you go. It’s the “old” way.
But I have 4 happy, well-adjusted, girls who hit near-perfect SAT scores — all of whom are productive citizens who serve their country, all college bound with bright futures.
So mock the old way if you want.[/quote]
<3 you.
[quote]Jewbacca wrote:
I have 4 daughters and I raised them pretty much by myself, although my parents helped. (My wife was killed when they were young, and I re-married all of a couple months ago.)
They are now 20, 19, 19 (twins), and my baby is 17. The eldest and one of the twins are combat medics. The eldest will attend an Ivy league school at the end of her stent. The other 19 also serves in a forward air position that I don’t want to say. Both of the twins will probably go to MIT. My baby is going to the IAF, and graduating with honors. No school yet.
Long story short, I am super full of pride with my girls. Smart, sweet, tough, and scary pretty. The all kind of look like Mila Kunis, if you want to know. They also will kill you, if need be.
We had a pretty serious religious household — I grew up Haredi (black hat orthodox), and raised my daughters what would be called “modern Orthodox” in the States
I was candid about twisting off when I was in the military and trying to have sex with basically any female that moved. I would lie, cheat, steal for pussy.
Then I met their mother (who happened to be a virgin, although it would not have mattered), and from that point on, I never willingly touched (as in, I didn’t shake hands) with a female not in my family. It was a commitment I made.
The male-female touch is amazingly powerful and to reserve that for your spouse alone creates an amazing intamacy.
Sex, much more so.
I raised them that sex is an amazing gift from G-d, that the best sex I ever had was with their mother, and to wait, if at all remotely possible.
I expect my eldest to be married shortly. They will go to college togehter — which I think is one of the mistakes Western countries make — waiting too damn long to get married and have kids.
So there you go. It’s the “old” way.
But I have 4 happy, well-adjusted, girls who hit near-perfect SAT scores — all of whom are productive citizens who serve their country, all college bound with bright futures.
So mock the old way if you want.[/quote]
I’m going to have to go with my buddy, Jewbacca. This.
[quote]Tex Ag wrote:
[quote]legendaryblaze wrote:
The truth. All sides of it.[/quote]
Care to elaborate? [/quote]
Life revolves around sex. It is a fact. Some people want to fuck you cause they love you; others just want to use your body to get off.
There is no black and white. It’s gray.
Sex feels great. There are dangers involved with it.
Basically, imagine you are telling your younger brother about it. She will be curious about it. Best you can do is explain to to her as a responsible adult, and tell her you expect her to be a responsible adult. Tell her there are social stigmas with it.
Just be honest with her, and if you’ve raised her well, everything should be fine. Put an emphasis on it being wrong until she loves the person very much and is over 18, haha, if you have to, but do not lie.
I don’t really know what to say. It’s a very complicated issue.
I learned everything from books. My Nana gave me my first romance novel when I was 12. It was a Reader’s Digest condensed book and the author was very vague about the actual sex part but it was nice and romantic and sweet for someone my age. I soon found out that not all romance novels were like that…some are practically erotica/porn. But after awhile, one sex scene is the same as the others and I started skipping them. I had been reading Sweet Valley High since 4th grade. I had to force my mom to give me “the talk” and even then it didn’t last long and covered basically nothing as I can’t remember a word that was said.
I had a great negative role model in high school. My best friend, who was a grade ahead of me, lost her virginity her freshman year. She had at least 2 abortions (that I know of) during high school and 2 more after high school. She wasn’t even sure she could have kids (she now has a son, thank goodness). I saw what having sex did to her. She even asked me how I could say no, how I could possibly stop with just making out? That kind of thinking amazes me to this day.
My parents told me practically nothing about sex or birth control or anything. I learned on my own: from books, my dad’s pornos (man, was I shocked he had that stuff!!!), and watching what others went through. It almost seemed like a burden, like once you’d had it, you always had to have it with whoever you were with, couldn’t just have a nonsexual relationship, you couldn’t wait to have sex, you had to have it right away.
I think, and hope, I would tell my daughter whatever she asked and to be careful, and please, please, please, please wait and THINK before doing anything. Do not do anything due to peer pressure. Anything sexual is too important, too private to be done because your friends are doing it too. To be in the “in” crowd or the “cool” crowd is not the reason to do anything, especially sexual stuff. In the end, it’s her choice, I can’t force her to remain abstinent, but I can give her as much info to make her as safe as possible.
No offense man, but you might as well not tell them anything if you’re first instinct is to ask people on T-Nation.
[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
[quote]Tex Ag wrote:
I have been thinking about this lately. Although I have some time before this needs to be broached I thought it could be an interesting discussion. The age group I had in mind was 12 to 14 years old. A thread some time ago about how young is too young got me thinking about this some. Given girls are starting puberty even earlier than 12 and some guys here think puberty is a green light, well, it got me thinking of what to tell girls about boys who show interest.
So what would tell your daughters (current and/or future) about boys when it comes to relationships and sex?
Addendum: I think a thread about what to tell boys about girls would be interesting at a later date.[/quote]
Catholic School and love.[/quote]
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!
WRONG ANSWER
Catholic school girls were the EASIEST to bang! When I got expelled from public school, my mom enrolled me in Archbishop Spalding HS. I went through the entire cheerleading squad in ONE SEMESTER. There was actually a contingent of mothers who told the school that if I were returning, that they were withdrawing their daughters (those spoiled little rich girls never stood a chance against a city boy with game - I was everything their parents warned them about). So back to public school I went (in a different county).
Point being, Catholic school girls are the easiest, daddy issue, repressed sexuality having chicks on the planet - when you finally get them alone they go CRAZY. If you want to turn your daughter into a slut, send her to Catholic school.
[quote]Sarev0k wrote:
No offense man, but you might as well not tell them anything if you’re first instinct is to ask people on T-Nation.
[/quote]
HEY! I RESEmble that remark! LOL
[quote]Grneyes wrote:
I learned everything from books. My Nana gave me my first romance novel when I was 12. It was a Reader’s Digest condensed book and the author was very vague about the actual sex part but it was nice and romantic and sweet for someone my age. I soon found out that not all romance novels were like that…some are practically erotica/porn. But after awhile, one sex scene is the same as the others and I started skipping them. I had been reading Sweet Valley High since 4th grade. I had to force my mom to give me “the talk” and even then it didn’t last long and covered basically nothing as I can’t remember a word that was said.
I had a great negative role model in high school. My best friend, who was a grade ahead of me, lost her virginity her freshman year. She had at least 2 abortions (that I know of) during high school and 2 more after high school. She wasn’t even sure she could have kids (she now has a son, thank goodness). I saw what having sex did to her. She even asked me how I could say no, how I could possibly stop with just making out? That kind of thinking amazes me to this day.
My parents told me practically nothing about sex or birth control or anything. I learned on my own: from books, my dad’s pornos (man, was I shocked he had that stuff!!!), and watching what others went through. It almost seemed like a burden, like once you’d had it, you always had to have it with whoever you were with, couldn’t just have a nonsexual relationship, you couldn’t wait to have sex, you had to have it right away.
I think, and hope, I would tell my daughter whatever she asked and to be careful, and please, please, please, please wait and THINK before doing anything. Do not do anything due to peer pressure. Anything sexual is too important, too private to be done because your friends are doing it too. To be in the “in” crowd or the “cool” crowd is not the reason to do anything, especially sexual stuff. In the end, it’s her choice, I can’t force her to remain abstinent, but I can give her as much info to make her as safe as possible.[/quote]
Haha, I was basically the same. Neither of my parents ever said one single peep about anything even remotely related to sex. I didn’t even know what my period was until it happened (though it was far less traumatic than Carrie). Even to this day, not a single peep. All my friends think I’m lucky, they’d all wanted to gouge out their ears when cornered by their parents for the ‘talk’. I figured it out the mechanics of it when I was around 10 just by simple deduction skills – it wasn’t something my friends talked about at that age, it was a time when kids still played outside and worried about trading marbles, not body fluid.
Anyway… I used to read those medical information instructions on the back of magazine ads for erectile dysfunction products. Learned about how erections worked and to consult a doctor if it lasts longer than 4 hours, lol. The pamphlet inside a tampons box got me the female alternative. I’d get my hands on romance books, hide them behind my bed or inside game boxes and be terribly paranoid that my parents would find them. I’d watch every ‘debauchery’ tv show I could even no one was around. It’s actually amazing how much I could learn lurking in the shadows.
Now kids have other pervert kids and the Internet to teach them everything they need.
Anywhoo, I don’t actually have any suggestions for you, except that I don’t recommend avoiding the subject like this, haha.
EDIT: Yeah, I re-read this and it’s all typos and no paragraphs. Too late for me to edit and care, though. Sorry.