The Keg!?!? My appetite just went from 0 to a hundo real quick, I could go for a big steak and some of that mashed tater goodness right now.
4SURE!
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Yeah Jenn I feel you a bit here.
My oldest son turned 21 a couple of weeks ago, the young one turns 18 in a month.
The oldest is away from home and the youngster is having his own life with a girlfriend his buddies and study.
However it gives me and the missus some freedom.
Itās hard to let go, but Iāve learned that our kids is only for loan, so enjoy them for as long as possible and donāt try to hang on to them.
You might not find the shining knight, but if you can find a couple of good friends to hang out with occasionally and have fun with, then the ageing wonāt be so hard.
Oh and that b-day weekend sound great.
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Thanks!! I think thatās a good point . I should aim for friends before a man. They would help me keep my sanity in check if I do meet one ,Lol!! Hooefully anywayā¦
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Well, you can also have friends that turn into something else later on. Iām an extreme case, but my wife and I were best friends through our teens and 20ās, fell out of touch some due to geographic distance and some poor life choices on my part, and just got married at 53 and 48. Just be a friend with no intentions, and donāt try to force something that isnāt there. Some people tend to be really bad about this, with the pseudo-myth of the āfriend zoneā and all that, where someone pretends to be a friend but is really just waiting for their chance to pounce during a moment of emotional vulnerability, then complain because the other wasnāt interested that way because they took the friendship at face value.
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Well Iām slacking for my bday, no big chunk of beefā¦ yet.
Hope you have a wonderful day there Jen!
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Hey all !
Today
Squats
115lbs x 7
135lbs x 7
150lbs x 7
160lbs x 2 sets of 7
Pin squats which Iām making more tempo pin so it can clank evenly
150lbs x 2 sets of 4
Paused bench
95lbs x 2
105lbs x 2
110lbs x 2
115lbs x 2
105lbs x 2 x 2 super long pause
Front foot elevated db split squats ss landmine press
15lbs / bar plus 15lbs
X 10 / x 8
15lbs / 20lbs
X 10 / x 8
X 10 / x 8
1 drop BW Bulgarian split squats x 15 / bar plus 10lbs x 10 or 12 I forget
Leg ext
50lbs x 2 sets of 6
30lbs x I forget
Step mill intervals x 20 min
Wt 124.2lbs
All awesome
BYE
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Just got back from my vacation and working through every bodyās log. Yeah, I feel this. My daughter will be fifteen in a few days, and my son is twelve - started middle school two years ago (fifth grade here). Sheās already done with me - wants to hang with her friends, honor roll student, great kid, but individuating big time.
My son, not so much - yet. He still likes to hang with me (remember, separated, not in the same house with them).
And, yeah, this is tough. But, somebody told me that my kids are on loan to me, I donāt own them. I have to raise them and let them go. That relieved a lot of the stress for me.
Having moved out, I really miss this. Just being together is really important.
Iām alone 24/7 - it sucks, but I hear you get used to it.
Bro, same. Love yourself, then you donāt āneedā anybody. Iām not there yet, but that is what I hear.
Love!
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I initially read this as a misspelling of āThe Kegelā (took the ā!ā for an ālā).
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Lmao, it is a wonderful exercise for the misses but I usually donāt get excited enough to post about it.
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Hey missed ya buddy , glad to have you back!
Sucks weāre kinda in the same boat , but maybe Iāll feel more settled when I know heās happy and settling in. Iād never want him to go through the bully hell I did. That could be the major route of my anxiety about all this , who knows .
I often feel like my loneliness would dissipate with a new season of narcos, ha ! But that simple cure surely wont last forever.
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K amazing today
Deadlifts
135lb x 5 , x 3
185lbs x 3
205lbs x 1
Belt
215lbs x 1
225lbs x 1
230lbs x 1
235lbs x 1
Yahhhh felt easier than 225. 15lbs to 2x bodyweight , letās get it !!
1hr manic back shit
Bicep pumping
Cardio
BYE
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Bro, this is so true.
Just figured out my ex was a narc, or a psychopath. Man, what a brutal experience.
Weās mismo GF, just try and try. Now we know.
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K good
Front squats
95lbs x 5
115lbs x 5
125lbs x 5
130lbs x 5
Back off sets
115lbs x 5 , 110lbs x 2 sets of 5
Bench press
100lbs x 8
105lbs x 8
Tempo bench
105lbs x 2 sets of 4
Bb split squats
65lbs x 10
70lbs x 8, x 10
Leg spreader
X 4 sets of I dunno
Incline db press w/ pause at bottom
27.5lbs x 12
32.5lbs x 2 x 8
Tri ext x bunch of shit
Stepmill intervals x 20
Two days of rest now thank G.
BYE
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Rest day comment:
I forgot to mention that after heavy singles of DL on Saturday I woke up on sunday with absolutely zip zero ziltch back soreness, not even a smidgen.
HellllOooOo, awesome leg drive abilities.
GLUTES R WORKIN
WELL
WOOP
BYe
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Omg Spock front squatsā¦a lot. wowwwwwwwww.
I often read your log randomly, a few times weekly, and your eloquent Jenn-vernacular ceaselessly makes me smile. So much so, I sort of end up just reading your rants and accidental haikuās for a while, as I do relate to you a lot. So thanks for existing on T-nation since I joined years ago. Itās the little things, man.
Itās like, sometimes I hate being crazy but then I donāt know what Iād do if it werenāt like thisā¦Itās like my ace card in the dark when I have nothing to turn to, and stuff.
Anyway.
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YES same goes for you! We are like related cyberally or something. Messed up brain besties!!
I once said this to @Spock81 about her log:
āIām blown away by the searing, lancinating honesty of your writingāwhich, BTW, borders on brilliant at times. (I wouldnāt be surprised if a future archivist, after stumbling upon and reading your TN logs, decided to publish them as a poetry equivalent of āfound art.ā)ā
So, yeah.
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Still one of the nicest comments Iāve ever read 
. That and power puff comparing my back width to dana linn bailey 
#smilesfordays
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k good workout yesterday
paused squats
115lbs x 4
135lbs x 4
155lbs x 4
165lbs x 4
170lbs x 3 sets of 4
double paused squats
150lbs x 2 sets of 4
best my double pauses have ever felt
military press
65lbs
x 10
x 10
x 10
bent over row
95lbs x 2 sets of 6, x 8
seated Db press
27.5lbs x 10, x 2 sets of 12
back ext.
BW x 3 sets of 15
DB lateral raises
drop sets
10lbs x 15
7.5lbs x 15
5lbs x 15
rear delt fly
x 20, x 20
hammer curl
17.5lbs x 10
12.5lbs x 2 sets of 10
goblet squats
32.5lbs x 20
DOne
rest till BDAY AYYHH
BYE
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Rest day ramblings :
A friend I worked with at wal mart 12 years ago reached out to me to tell me sheās going through a divorce and is very depressed and anxious and wants my help to get in shape. I told her I personally cannot train her , but everyone who works here has a free complimentary one year pass to give away to whomever we please. I told her if she was serious I would give her my pass and she could buy some discounted sessions with my best trainer friend and I could help motivate her if she comes in during my shift.
She has come in twice . She has cancelled and rescheduled all of her sessions over and over again and the one time she came in all she wanted to do was foam roll and walk on the treadmill. She had one workout and said she was too sore to workout for like 10 days.
This irritates not only me, but also my trainer friend. So I messaged her and told her I thought she would get more use out of it etc etcā¦
She said its a big adjustment and has to start slowly blah blah. I said I understand this is new and can be hard, but its also very worth it. I said she might have to give herself some tough love in this case and suck it up. I said she could workout sore. I said that lots of people train though some really difficult things and it can be super rewarding. I also told her that I believed in her and that she could do this.
Anyway, she blew up at me , really hated the suck it up comment, and sent me an essay length message filled with excuses and whatnot.
At first this made me really anxious because I never have confrontation with anyone ever, then it made me anxious because I thought I was a monster as I didnāt feel even a smidgen of sympathy for her.
AM I DEAD INSIDE?
WHY DONT IC ARE ABOUT HER EXCUSES??!
I make excuses for shit all the time. I have tons of anxiety and I should be extremely compassionate , but for some reason Iām not??
I thought about it last night and I realized that I try very hard not to allow my anxiety to effect others. For example, when my dad is anxious he gets irritable and yells at everyone. I never do that. I feel like I am going to explode inside , but I donāt take it out on my loved ones. I will tell gabe that I am anxious and I canāt talk right now, but I would never yell at him. I always communicate it and I try to express whatās going on with me.
I donāt approach others to give me assistance because that in itself would give me guilt induced anxiety for asking for something. I might call my mom and ask if I am being rational or ask if she can go for a walk with me or something, but I wouldnāt seek someone out who isnāt a trained professional to help me overcome my issues.
BUT, with that said, I can understand why I am the way I am and why she is the way she is. She was married for over 10 years. I have always been single and on my own. She is used to someone always being around. I am used to having conversations with my demons in my head all day.
Iāve had this since I was in grade school, sheās new to the game.
SO perhaps in that regard I can sympathize . She simply doesnāt know how to feel anxious and alone at the same time. I donāt know how to feel anxious and with someone.
Anyway, I still have no sympathy for her excuses , but I will wait another month before I do anything about her pass.
k
BYE
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