T Nation

What Business is it of Yours Where I'm From, Friendo?


You should try not to use such terms… it can come across a bit like “billy no mates”. Something like what duke said " hey I had a great time, we should do it again soon". You could also add in " will check my calendar to see when I will be available", this points out that you have much more going on in life than sitting waiting around to be txed. Men love a chase, sometimes the harder the catch the more interest generated.

The best thing you could do is focus on improving yourself, keep up the training, go out with friends, get your hair done, just enjoy being single and independent. Somewhere down the line out of the blue something will happen. If he had more interest he would be instigating things a lot more, thinking about you often and txing, clearly he has other things going on that are higher priority than you. I know if I fancied a girl and I was interested, she would be constantly on my mind and I would be making it a priority to make sure she knew.


Oh wow that makes me feel kinda down, but good to know I guess


I mean he drove 45 minutes in a snow storm to hang out with me in my sons closet until 2am I think I should feel somewhat settled that his interest level is fairly close to what mine is for him


Well that does show interest lol. Maybe you are expecting too much too soon? See how things pan out. On a more serious note, You copied my 81 :stuck_out_tongue:


That could be very true.
All this is very rare for me so i really don’t know timelines or what to expect .


Not necessarily. You’re projecting yourself onto him. Some men are like you and go all in all at once. Other men are more circumspect, preferring to go slowly and let things develop at a more incremental pace, especially when they’re juggling career, potential house buying, and other huge life choices (like deciding if someone is marriage/life partner potential.)

Time will tell which this guy is. Driving 45 minutes in a snow storm shows interest and persistence :slight_smile:


I should also note that he is divorced and 6 yrs older than me.

Who is to say what happened with his marriage doesnt make him a very cautious person . I dont know what it’s like to go through a divorce. Maybe if I had, I would want to take things very slowly


I know where you are coming from with this, though I am married 10 years. A lot has changed on the dating scene. I’m actually trying to get out, the opposite lol

It only takes 2 mins to send a text message. There not many men I know takes it that slow if they are interested, though being divorced changes things a bit. Maybe he is just being extra cautious.


K good workout

135lbs x 5
185lbs x 3
205lbs x 1
225lbs x 2
235lbs x 1
245lbs x 1
250lbs x 2 x 1

Bent over row
95lbs x 10
105lbs x 2 x 10

Leg spreader
60lbs x 50 + 50 partials

Two d handle lat pull down
Drop set
85lbs x 6
70lbs x 8
55lbs x 10
Foot on seat lat pull to me
70lbs x 6
55lbs x 8
40lbs x 10

Seated leg curl
60lbs x 10
45lbs x 10

T bar row
Bar plus
50lbs x 2 x 12
25lbs x 15

Wide d handle lat pull down
60lbs x 10
65lbs x 10
70lbs x 10

Ropey bi curl
10lbs x 15
15lbs x 10
Seated row cable
85lbs x 6
55lbs x 15

Front pulldown machine
40lbs x 8
30lbs x 12

Barbell curl
30lbs x 2 x 10
20lbs x 15

Hammer curls
20lbs x 8
15lbs x 8
7.5lbs x 10

Step mill intervals x 20



See, I think this way too. I feel like I’m trying to stay delusional by telling myself all these possibilities, but the truth of the matter is I’ve made every single move.


Truth of the matter is, you’re a beautiful and interesting woman. Any man that doesn’t see that is missing out. Their loss not yours. You deserve a man that will take the lead and make you feel wanted. Not some boy that will leave you wondering where you stand. Just my opinion.


Aww thx for saying that. I appreciate it :blush:


Couldn’t have said it any better mate


You’re such a cool chick, into weights, your kid, your job, very passionate about life and trying to find yourself.

Who wouldn’t love you?

So texted J when I got home last night, thanked her for a nice evening, and she texted back today, good movie, good company (we saw A Star is Born, great movie).

I’ve come to realize we’re not a good fit. But it has taken me four months to figure this out and I am so glad that we are friends rather than something more because pulling back is going to be much easier than if we were intimate.

Slow is good. And trust me, she is very attractive, and we might still end up as something more than friends, but I am so glad that we took the time to get to know each other.

You rock Spock, know in your heart that you do and let the bees come to you.


Thank you for this post, my friend :two_hearts:


K today

Paused squats
135lbs x 6
155lbs x 6
165lbs x 6
175lbs x 6
Very explosive reps today.

Military press w semi pause
60lbs x 3 x 9

Seated db press
27.5lbs x 2 x 10, x 8

Db row
27.5lbs x 15

Step mill intervals x 5

Leg spreader
100lbs x 35

Db lateral raises
7.5lbs x 20

Rear delt db fly
7.5lbs x 20

Db tri ext
7.5lbs x 20

K good.

I feel sad
Yes yes, who cares it’s one guy , play the field, don’t put all your eggs in one basket, you barely knew him.

Oh wells , I feel fucking sad
I know all those things, but my sadness still exists because I like him, I was excited , and I feel cursed , for realz.

This too shall pass



What happened???


K wow good day. Amazing how much better this workout goes after a rest day.

Front squats
95lbs x 4
115lbs x 4
125lbs x 2
135lbs x 2
140lbs x 2
145lbs x 2 yayy
130lbs x 4 x 2

Paused bench
95lbs x 4
105lbs x 4
110lbs x 4 yay so easy
100lbs x 2 x 4

Step mill intervals x 5

Leg spreader
130lbs x 15
70lbs x 15 + 15 partials

Incline db press
30lbs x 15 w pause
27.5lbs x 12

Rear delt db fly x 15



K another 3hr sleep Saturday, ugh, kept it light ya’ll

145lbs x 5 sets of 10

Bench press
100lbs x 2 x 8
100lbs x 15

Barbell split squats
75lbs x 2 x 8

Leg spreader
225lbs x 8
150lbs x 8
120lbs x 8

Landmine press
Bar plus
20lbs x 2 x 6
10lbs x 8

Single leg ext
Ez bar cable tri ext
Db lateral raises

Step mill intervals x 20


K great

135lbs x 4
185lbs x 4
205lbs x 4
220lbs x 4
230lbs x 4

Bent over row
100lbs x 8
110lbs x 2 x 6

Foot on seat lat pull to me ss 2 d handle lat pull down
55lbs 70lbs
X 10 x 10
40lbs 55lbs
X 8 x 8
X 8 x 8

Lat pull down
27.5lbs x 2 x 10 , x 12

T bar row
Bar plus
X 3 x 12
Dual pulley row
20lbs x 12

Leg spreader
70lbs x 50 + 50 partials

Leg curl
40lbs x 20 + 10 partials

Rope bi curl
10lbs x 20
15lbs x 10

Seated row cable
85lbs x 6
55lbs x something

Front pull down machine
Drop sets
35lbs x 6
27.5lbs x 8
20lbs x 10

Bb curl
30lbs x 12, x 10
20lbs x 10

Hammer curls
15lbs x 8
10lbs x 8
7.5lbs x 10

Step mill intervals x 20

I dunno if my back changes anymore lol

Maybe I’m wider but less defined which is fine
I dont really need to be wide or defined
I just love backing!!!

Oh edit to add

I was still pretty tired and 185 felt heavy and I was worried how shit would go, but I gave myself a pep talk, told myself it was mind over matter and to move that shit fast. 230 felt easier then 185 :blush: