I have bouts of depression and I'll tell ya it's nothing to just dismiss cuz we're big tough guys. I have problems with my appearance even though all my friends say I've almost got a models face, I'm pretty buff, and I'm by far the best athlete when we play rec sports together. I think my dick is too small even though I'm just over 7" and my girl loves our sex life. I have a good job with outstanding potential in my field, but I still think other guys have more money and are therefore more attractive.
Like I said before everyone around me thinks I'm lucky and special and all that. Here's the thing though...you have to believe it yourself and you have to be happy with yourself. A high percentage of guys would trade places with me in a heartbeat and be happy as can be, but I can't seem to consistently believe that.
I'll note that tons of uber successful people are the same way. This type of personality can result in drug abuse and anti socialism. This is why athletes and big time guys financially fall into these pitfalls of doing dumb shit.
Glad to see you're getting it turned around. Just remember life is a beautiful thing and your situation could always be much. much worse.