T Nation

Weirdest Dreams You've Ever Had

What are some weird dreams you’ve had. Here’s one of my top 5.

I was drag racing down a city street, some how I ended up at home.
A half ma, half ape smashed through my sun room while I was talking to my mom, and I had to kill the beast to prove my dominance with my mom looking on. It had already attacked her, so I was pissed. I wrestled the beast, grabbed his face, exposed his neck, and bit into his jugular. As I was about to rip his neck out, I woke up. I just had this dream 20 seconds.

I had a dream I was WolBarret’s mom. He saved my life.


I had a really fucked up dream today:

I had a dream i was smoking weed with piccolo in Pakistan.

Funny you should mention dreams. I had the most random dream in some time last night.

There was this kid back in junior high that was a creepy little oddball. Looking back, he wasn’t even a cool nerd, he was just a dirtball. Picked his nose, had a plumber crack all the time, and stared down the shirt of the hottie that sat across from him in English class everytime she bent over to get a book. He was just creepy. Anywho, last night I had this dream where I was at a wedding or some social function that required me to wear a suit and tie. I was in a big dining room area with a bunch of tables, and this kid comes running past me and puts a booger in my ear.

I get insta-pissed and start chasing after him. He runs into the bathroom and I figured I had him corned then, and I did. It was like the bathroom fight scene from Casino Royale, I took the top off the toilet and smashed it over his head, and just beat the living shit out of him. He was laying in the fetal position on the floor saying “Please stop! Noooo!” and what not. There was blood everywhere and I think I killed him. Then I just woke up. Strange part is, I had pretty much forgotten about him, I haven’t seen the kid in probably 10 years at least. Then I have a dream where I beat his ass. Cool.

The best dreams are when I’m a vampire. That shit is awesome. I can run at like the speed of light, I have cool ass long blonde hair, and I fight all the other vampires cause they dress like it’s still the Victorian era.

All my vampire dreams usually involve buxom wenches and all that smooth vampire seduction. I seem to have had a lot of those ones recently.

FWIW, I don’t care much for garlic.

[quote]ahzaz wrote:
I had a really fucked up dream today:

I had a dream i was smoking weed with piccolo in Pakistan.[/quote]

Um… that wasn’t a dream dude, I was there too.

Snowboarding down a mountain chasing Bill Clinton while trying to shoot him with a rifle.

[quote]LiftSmart wrote:
Snowboarding down a mountain chasing Bill Clinton while trying to shoot him with a rifle.[/quote]

You had a dream that you were Dick Cheney?

[quote]LiftSmart wrote:
Snowboarding down a mountain chasing Bill Clinton while trying to shoot him with a rifle.[/quote]

That’s from a James Bond film.

Once dreamed that I was in this HUGE blender with the Loch Ness Monster, in front of 50000 spectators in a Roman colliseum.

I beat the monster to death with an oar (yeah, I had an oar for some reason) and a door in the side of the giant blender opened and allowed me to escape.

An emperor-type figure in the audience pressed a huge red button, and Nessie got ground to a bloody, sinewy pulp.

Then I woke up.

WTF?! My dreams are usually so lame. eg: I’ll go to the grocery store to buy some “golden grahams” cereal or some crap, and then wake up. I have NO idea where this one came from.

If you want some crazy dreams, take some of the stuff from the Brain Boosters thread over in the Supps forum, especially Piracetam and Vinpo.

Last night, I dreamt that I had worked all my life to get rich. I’m then sitting talking to the Hindo God Krishna, while giving away all my money.

I keep a dream log.

Here is one I had a couple months ago. The visuals in this dream were incredibly realistic and disturbing. Sorry about the poor writing.

I was planning on going with my Mom on a trip to Mexico. I had information from a previous dream that there was a demon in the airport, and 100k soldier had been dispatched to take care of it. Before we left, I realized there was a demonic presence in m y room. By this time, there was a massive firefight in the airport, and we could tell our trip would not be happening. Later, the demonic presence took over my Mom, and my cat.

I did not know how to perform an exorcism, so I blessed a bucket of water turning it into holy water. I then forced the demons out of my Mom and cat by drowning them in the holy water. I then went to the airport to take care of the situation there. Most of the soldiers were already dead, but I made my way to the area where the leader of the demons, a massive monstrous creature was inhabiting. I am not clear on my relation to him, but I got the feeling I was his son.

I was supposed to be helping him, but decided to sabotage him instead. I ended up blessing his water supply with a small bird I found. An army of angels appeared, and violently dispatched him. Unfortunately, the world was overrun with demons by this point.

The rest of the dream was spent traveling through the apocalyptic world that was Earth, looking for survivors and killing demons. A small group of warriors was formed, and we traveled with the remaining civilians. We had a massive arsenal, but ammo was always a problem. When killing big demons, I gained certain powers from them. They weren�??t magical, but they made me much stronger.

After making our way through a factory filled with human carcasses, we arrived in a beautiful field full of remaining survivors. Another group of warriors were fending off demons, but the demons had begun to overtake them and make their way into the field. I tried to help them, but I ran out of ammo. I started to use a large saber, but wore it down from stabbing so many demons. In the end I was left with a steak knife, against a vast army of low-level (almost zombie) demons.

Then, a leader of the demons, in the form of a beautiful, elegant girl appeared. I tried to stab her, but the steak knife would not go deep into her. The leader of my team of warriors, another girl, jumped over the carnage surrounding the demon, and mortally stabbed her. When she died, every demon with her died as well.

We had a brief, peaceful moment before our group moved on. Beyond the field, the setting was similar to hell on earth. Massive beasts were everywhere, and we had to reach a tunnel beyond them. Our bullets became ineffective, and we were forced to just run towards our destination. When it was clear that we were overwhelmed, the dream ended.

I had a dream I was making out with Vanessa Williams in the bathroom of a really fancy restaurant. She was wearing a ball gown and I was dressed in rags like a homeless person (in other words, like I always dress), but her husband was there and she was scared we’d get caught. I got pissed and started yelling “Did he hit you again? I swear to god, if that motherfucker lays a hand on you I’ll fucking kill him!”

She persuaded me to leave, and I left through the back. As I walked through the kitchen all the Mexicans were cheering for me like I was Robin Hood or Garibaldi or something. My sons were waiting for me in the alley, running amok, the younger kids spray painting graffiti on the walls while the older ones supervised. There were 14 of them, from teenagers to 4 or 5 years old, they were all different races, some were half black, half asian, red-headed, blond, brunette, but they were all my sons. I guess I had a multi-racial harem somewhere.

Anyway, I rounded up my offspring, and we jumped on a bus. The bus driver let us on for free, and gave me a high five because I was Robin Hood or Garibaldi or something. “It’s an honor to have you aboard, sir” the driver said and we rode off into the night. I sat down next to my oldest son, who was 15 and must have had a hispanic mom, and we started to talk about…something…then I woke up.

I once dreamed I was in the wild wild west , almost like Clint eastwood’s characters. Except Clint’s characters did not fly around the desert and get shot at the end. I immediately woke up gasping for air.

I once had a dream that was a blow for blow recreation of this fight:


Except I have no idea why I was beating up the guy.

Had a very vivid dream one night that I was trying to break through the gates of hell- in order to get into hell and kill some demons and rescue someone (can’t remember whom). I remember waking up thinking that what I had just dreamed would be a very cool movie.

Well it’s not a weird dream, but i was a gorgeous one. I have a teacher I find attractive but she has a few physical flaws. In my dream she was perfect! She’s short and in the dream she was taller, she has awful pedicure but in the dream she had sexy feet she showed up in high heels, her skin was also smoother. Her eyes were still has beautiful.

Can’t remember what happened during the dream though.

while in the midst of ending my nicotine habit , I dreamt about pancakes 3 times over the course of about a month . extremely detailed , precisely laying out ingredients/supplies as I prepared to make the hot-cakes .

weird thing was , when I was a smoker I NEVER ate pancakes . after I quit , I ate them weekly (at least) for about a year

then I joined a gym

People get hang-overs from drinking too much, I get ‘high-overs’, from you can guess what. It makes for some pretty fucked up dreams, because the last half of my day is mixed in with convos with my girlfriend and my parents talking to me. Usually ends up with me dreaming about boning something while reciting Al Pacino’s speech in Any Given Sunday. And I have terrible stomach-aches and gas because I ate a bunch of random shit.

this one isn’t weird, but if anyone could shed some light, that would be great, lol.

I’ve had this dream at least 5-8 times.

It involves me being back in HS having to do another year (yet in the dream I know I’ve graduated and even graduated college). The latest one I was even back in elementary school having to repeat. I skipped a few classes in the dream, and ended up skipping the rest of the semester and had to repeat again.