T Nation

WannaBe’s Last Year Of “DYEL?”

If I have a bad workout, feel weak, etc. I like to remind myself, that maybe this one didn’t give me progress, but it probably kept me from going backwards. Glass half full type thinking.


Yes that’s what I tried to do. I went in with the plan on using 275 as my working weight and decided it wasn’t in the cards for what ever reason, maybe thumb, maybe sleep, idk. But decided just to take it down a notch as accept it as what you said. Might not have been a session where I’ll see growth and progress, but it counted for something.

I admit I have a super shitty attitude and need lots of work in that area and I’m trying. Getting rid of the coach and away from the mentality that I HAD to make progress has been beneficial, but I still struggle lol

1 Like

Agreed. As long as you are recovered, having a sub par workout is better than sitting on the couch doing nothing.


You are a big muscly bastard.

You are.

It’s a fact.


That’s very sweet, and I appreciate that, wish it was true :joy:

1 Like


It’s true.

1 Like

What he said.

1 Like

Do you ever compliment yourself? You do need to work on your self-confidence/self-worth in order to get more humble with yourself. If you don’t appreciate yourself enough, it can get tricky in close relations, as another person need to fill that void (which they can’t). I hear you are seeing a therapist. Have you tried self-compassion therapy?

That being said, it is amazing to follow your efforts in this thread. You certainly do a good job at the gym. It’s the crappiest workouts that count! You should be proud of yourself, for coming back again and again. No one does it better! Do you know how many people you inspire in this forum? I have started to think about you, whenever I feel skipping a workout. You don’t - Neither do I! DYEL - I don’t think so! Beach 2022 here we come (even at my age)! LOL


No lol. It kinda makes me feel slightly embarrassed when people compliment me because I genuinely don’t believe them myself so I feel bad for portraying myself in a way that would make them think that. Granted the pictures I do post are the most flattering ones I can get which makes it my fault to begin with lol

100% agree and that’s a main topic of my weekly therapy

Also 100% agree lol

Maybe… not sure what it is so I’m unsure. I will Google it though.

Thanks man. It’s one thing I have the ability to control, effort. I still struggle but In a world that feels so uncontrollable, I try hard to control the things that are in my power. I definitely appreciate the kind words man. I really do love this place and the people that make it.


+1 :wave:


Thanks man. I’d have never guessed anybody would be inspired by any of this. it’s quite humbling.

It is harder to do as you progress but i feel like progress pics help with complementing myself. Compare some pics of you now to a year ago. I bet you’ll find something that has improved.

1 Like

The college is I go to is in my hometown. It’s turned out to be a pretty good fit for me, but I only chose it so I could continue living at home and cut the cost in half, and continue to be with my family.

Through being in the same classes with the same kids for over two years now, and being somewhat involved in one program, I’ve made some friends, but they’re mostly surface level friends. Someone to chat with in class and maybe get together with if we’re in the same town in the future, but no one I’ll be calling when I need help. I don’t live in a dorm, don’t really use social media, and am usually working or spending time with my family when I am not in class or doing homework.

I had my first kid at age 21 with the only girlfriend I’ve ever had, who I’ve been with since probably age 16 or so. Relationships don’t always work but I’m going to try to make it last with her, haha. She’s a good woman/mom and I’m sure my kid would prefer to have his parents be together (this isn’t a knock on anyone else’s situation, I know sometimes things just don’t work out).

We’re talking about moving away for a year or two after school for some job training, but we always talk about coming back here as soon as we’re done.

Anyway, point is, I get the feeling of “missing out.” My best buddy is basically never in a relationship or tied to much, so every year or two he’s moving somewhere new to try something out. Doesn’t always look that bad, also doesn’t always look that good. Sometimes he enjoys it, sometimes not so much.

Some of my other high school classmates went on to have the typical college experience, complete with parties and trips. (Not all of these kids’ parents were rich but they were well off enough that the kids didn’t have to worry about jobs or much real world responsibilities.)

Some kids started down the path, and quickly realized they couldn’t handle it or became burnouts and are now garbage men and waitresses (I’m not knocking people who do these jobs, just admitting that they don’t require much from a person).

Anywhooo, getting long winded here, just saying that I’ve probably had a somewhat similar experience as you. Busy with work and school, dad a young age, etc. Oh well. Some of my friends look like they’re having a great time in life, but I’m fine with my life. I’m happy. I have no great love for my hometown but it’s where my family is and that’s what matters to me. Sometimes I don’t mind the sound of having less responsibilities, but I’m where I’m at in life because of my own choices and for the most part, happy with how things have ended up.

You’ve got a good job. You’ve got a couple kids who you seem to work very hard for. You’re the jacked and juicy dad who has no problems getting chicks. Doesn’t sound too bad to me. If you wanna move someday, go for it, but I wouldn’t worry too much about what you missed out on. Those experiences seem to not be had by everyone anyways, and you can certainly live a fulfilling life without them.


Man, it’s tough to have a pity party around here without people using common sense and making well thought out posts of encouragement and offering other useful ways to look at my situation :joy:

This is all very true. I need to work on not getting caught up with all the what if’s of life and just make the best of the present.


@wanna_be @jshaving you guys are both quite inspiring. I can’t imagine the amount of responsibility needed to juggle kids, job and school.

Can one of you guys explain this?

I am by most ppls definition “missing out” but I don’t feel that way. Sometimes I feel like I’m being “too social” since a lot of the friends I respect most (most that one) have less of a “social life” than me and are content burning their heads into work

Over time just hearing stories, seeing pictures, listening to subtle clues about ones past etc it’s easy for me to find myself around someone who it seems has done, been, seen, lives more than I have, by a long shot. I put a lot of value in “fun”, so it’s usually those types of things that make me think about what all I’d have liked to do.

I still have time. It’s not like I’m 79 or anything lol. It’s just now the world is a cruel bitch and I’m bogged down normal adult responsibilities so these things take planning and thought and time, all of which I dislike.

It’s honestly a great way to waste time and energy :roll_eyes:

1 Like

What exactly do you feel that you have missed out on? Which are the first/main 3 things you feel missed out in life so far?

@hankthetank89 i shall think about this and get back to you on an answer.

First day in Utah! Skipped leg day yesterday to make sure I was fresh and turns out maybe that was the wrong call. I’ve done something to my left knee and hip lol idk if it was the plane ride or what but it’s a little wonky.

Did a short hike today and played in some super cold water and met some cool people!

Meal prepped for tomorrow and the plan is to wake up at 4am and head 2 hours to south canyonlands (needles district) and hike 10-12 miles of my body holds up


wow that is beautiful. Where exactly in utah?

Maybe you said - are you by yourself? Or meeting up with people?