T Nation

Walking the walk

I have no more tolerance for people that talk about changing their lifestyle but never do it. I have two roommates: one fat, one skinny. They’re always telling me how they’re going to do this and that and they ask me for help and pointers and routines and diets. So I spend all this time showing them what to do then they turn around and sit on their asses and eat pizza. I would say 1 out of every 20 people actually does something about their body when it gets to that point. After going from 140 to 220 in 2 years I take it personally when someone talks about changing and never does so, its like a slap in the face and I’m at the point now where I just roll my eyes when someone tells me about their new gym membership or diet plan. I’ll believe it when I see the results.

Having experienced this literally hundreds of times myself, I’ll give you Char-Dawg’s Foolproof Plan for Weeding Out the Lazy Ones.

When someone asks you for advice, don’t roll your eyes. Instead, tell them to go buy a calorie counter book and keep track of what they eat for two weeks. You need to know what they’re eating now before you can help them, right?

This takes all of about ten seconds and puts the onus of doing something - a small something, but something - on the other person’s shoulders. 99 out of 100 people will never get back to you. (The hundredth one had potential.) But you haven’t wasted your time on them, and you have forced them to confront the idea that if they aren’t prepared to spend $20 on a book and carry around a small pad and pencil for a couple of weeks, they probably don’t have the discipline to change their body.

Try it. It works wonders for your attitude.

Amen.

Fragile,
OH MY GOD. Thank you for this post!! I agree with you 100% my man!!! I can so relate with you in many ways. I work in a corporate fitness center and I see what you are talking about just about everyday. People bitch and whine that they can’t lose any weight, but they don’t want to put the work in to do it. There are people where I work who aren’t members of the fitness center who walk past me and say, “I gotta get to the fitness center, I am getting so fat.” Do I ever see them…nope! Then there are people who come talk to me about getting help with starting a program which is great, but more often than not…they don’t last. Case in point. A few weeks ago I was talking with a group of ladies who were walking on the treadmill. They were all talking about how they come in everyday and do cardio, but never seem to be able to lose any weight. I was blunt and said, “I can guarantee that it is your diet.” So I took about 30-45 minutes talking about proper post-workout nutrition and the importance of meal timing, meal combinations, and food choices. I talked about the best protein sources, the best fat sources, and the best times of the day to consume the majority of your carbs (mornings and post-training). I got to the point where I said that they would have to give up their fast food meals and nightime junk food if they wanted to get any decent results. One ladies reply…“oh well, I can’t give up those things.” I was so irratated. I mean come on…throw me a freakin bone here. Atleast meet me half way!!

That is the one frustrating part of my job. The majority of people do not want to work for what they want. I mean, there are a few who are able and willing to sweat, but they are definetely in the minority.

So, yes…I can relate with you. And yes…it is annoying as heck.

Congrats on your own gains from 140 to 220!

A lot of people seem to think genetics are destiny, and everyone is fat or skinny or muscular because they were born that way. When you can show someone “before” pictures and say you used to be skinny, they take notice.

I am with you,i have had atleast 3 friends that have joined the gym with me,and i have sat down with these 3 and really helped them with diets only to have them give everything up inside of 2 weeks,why bother?

TonyG
I once also worked in the fitness field as a trainer and in a supplement store(not GNC). I love the lifestyle but could no longer listen to people whine who could not see the diet problem. I decided to focuse on my own goals, for I do not have the patiance to try and help the people who feel they can’t change. Mad props to you I know how frustrating it can be.
Colin

I experience this all the time. 3 years ago I lost 88 pounds with most of it being fat. After this, everyone was asking me how I lost the weight. A few asked for advise and I gave it to them. I explained to them about good food choices and timings on meals. At least 10 or more people I have sat down with and designed a diet for. Did any of them listen and stick to what planned out? Not one of them. It gets to the point where I don’t want to give out diet information because most people don’t listen anyway. It’s pretty frustrating and I can relate.

I’ve completly stopped answering people’s questions. All I’ll give them is Tmag’s address. So far no one has really taken me up on it. Some people have read a couple of issues and stopped. It saves me a lot of time writing out routines and eating plans.

Excellent thread.

Calorie counter? You mean there are people who go around WITHOUT tracking their food intake?! :slight_smile:

Now that’s a nice idea (asking them to track their calories for 2 weeks). I think I’ll start using it as I’m getting pretty snarky in my responses…

funny thing a former co worker calls me up asking for advice time to time, well to today he asks me have I ever done roids. I ask why and he tells me he wants to do them, after training for a few months, all I could do was say got togo back to work dude.
Somepeople I tell ya

Gotta agree hands down on this one although I’d say more like 1 in 1000. I’ve trained quite a few people who were already atheletes and made good progress (barley 4 pullups to 14 in 2 month). Anymore if people ask for advice and I know them well I try to be real positive get them all excited and then bet them $20 that if they either can’t explain the program I made for them, don’t start up on the program within a week of getting it or quit after 2 weeks they owe me. ( I know I’m a dick:-) but right now I’m $60 richer.

It’s the lazy ones that piss me off. Won’t get off their asses long enough to see the good it does them!Yeah, all I say is “T-mag.com

Oh, and to ensure that the people are serious, I tell them that if I decide to train them I’m going to charge them money. (This is after they’ve come back to me with their diet info.)

Right now I get $30 an hour for it, and generally meet with them once a month (if they already know how to work out). That’ll keep 'em from quitting most of the time. Or at least if they do, you don’t feel too bad about it, as you’ve gotten something out of the deal.

Char dawg, I started using that method a while ago… works like a charm!!!