T Nation

Turn My Pussy Brain Into A T-Man Brain

Short version: I want information on neuro-linguistic programming, self-hypnosis, or any other programs to overcome neurological strength / flexibility inhibitions. PLEASE HELP, read below to find out why I’m so frustrated.

Long version: I’m a former fat bastard. My body won’t let me do the splits if my legs have to support my weight because my brain still thinks like a little fat kid.

I took Christian Thibaudeau’s neurological efficiency test in his black book and scored a 1.75 for my height. The chart didn’t go below 2.5, which was the pussiest ranking he had.

When I’m kickboxing and grappling I’m one of the strongest people in the gym, but put me under some weights and I can’t do anything.

I’m 6 feet tall, 210 pounds, more muscular than the average shmoe. Over the last two years I’ve increased all my maxes by about fifty pounds. Now my 1rms are: BP - 150, ass-to-grass squat - 190, deadlift - 220, SLDL - 200. (Pounds, not kilograms.)

NOW HERE’S THE INTERESTING THING:

When someone is spotting my max lift attempts, I can usually lift my expected 1rm 3 times. Without the spotter I’ll barely get my expected 1rm up. For the longest time I accused my spotters of lifting the weight for me and they’d think I was a fucking maniac.

I’ve recently been reading Tsatsouline, Siff, Zatsiorsky, and Hatfield in regards to neurological inhibitions and am convinced that my extreme neurological inefficiency is a result of my traumatic childhood. I’ve been in therapy for years now and have made tremendous gains in my personal development, but the reading I’ve been doing has convinced me that my survival device as a child (hide, shut down from the world, protect myself at all costs) lingers in my shitty gym performances.

I’m lifting heavy weights/low reps and working on increasing tendon strength and the Golgi according to Hatfield, Tsatsouline, Simmons, Waterbury, Poliquin, Thibaudeau, and so many others.

BUT I know the problem is in my head and the key to my progression lies one hundred percent outside of the gym. If anyone can give me resources to defeat my inner pussy, I would be very grateful.

Thanks

Interesting post bro. In no way am I qualified to give any input, just wanted to say it might help if you didn’t call/think of yourself as a pussy. Good luck getting strong and congratulations on losing weight.

NLP works, no doubt. It starts with taking out all language describing yourself as a pussy, etc. Get any of Shad Helmstetter’s books regarding self talk. Make youself a tape reaffirming how strong you are, when you go to the gym you are a beast, when you squat you easily put up x pounds, etc. Play this tape over and over again. Your mind will start to believe it.

Read every atomic dog. Then read them again.

Your “inner pussy” is not the problem your overwhelming need for acceptance is the problem. You talk yourself down in the hopes that other people will say “your not like that” and that some how is what you want to hear and why you are posting this crap now. Did you ever think maybe you are right, you are a slack-ass pussy and maybe its time time to stand up and put your boots on. You say you have been in therapy for years, ever consider dropping that crap and buying some awesome weights instead? You could put together a great home-gym for what you spend playing “little boy”. Go buy a mirror and stop playing “please like me”, it would behoove you to grow up. Maybe I sound like a prick, but you asked for my opinion.

[quote]RoadWarrior wrote:
Your “inner pussy” is not the problem your overwhelming need for acceptance is the problem. You talk yourself down in the hopes that other people will say “your not like that” and that some how is what you want to hear and why you are posting this crap now. Did you ever think maybe you are right, you are a slack-ass pussy and maybe its time time to stand up and put your boots on. You say you have been in therapy for years, ever consider dropping that crap and buying some awesome weights instead? You could put together a great home-gym for what you spend playing “little boy”. Go buy a mirror and stop playing “please like me”, it would behoove you to grow up. Maybe I sound like a prick, but you asked for my opinion.[/quote]

I would have been even more harsh. This was the saddest attempt at wringing pity from readers that I have seen in a long time. You stop being a pussy by wanting to not be one and doing something about your weaknesses. I honestly don’t see how more books, regardless of their self help basis, will teach someone how to push for what they want. People who play football and want to get better train until they are better. People who want to be better fighters train until they are better fighters. People who want to be more masculine portray those attributes and turn away from weaknesses that take away from it. If this post was an attempt to get everyone to tell you aren’t a pussy…you failed. This was a very pussy post. You lift more weight when someone is spotting you yet make yourself believe you are weaker when training by yourself? Only someone who wants to be weaker, whether subconsciously or otherwise, would do something like that. People like that always need to depend on others. You need acceptance like most of us need food. Perhaps it is time to move out of your parents’ house and consider living life as your own man. How has thinking like this held you down in other aspects of your life? Is this why you are in therapy? Do you plan to rely on others forever? If not, then simply stop.

I gotta say - that takes some guts to post what you did, especially in a forum like this.

But Road Warrior is right. And somewhere in your mind you are still comfortable with failure. In fact, you crave failure because it feeds your low self-image - and your low self-image feeds your need to fail.

You gotta break the cycle. You’re not going to get it from a lifting partner, or a workout scheme. It’s not in your muscles - it’s between your ears. But you already know that.

Getting on here and fishing for support isn’t going to do the trick either - it’s only going to fuel your sub-conscious desire to sabotage your efforts.

You have to get mad enough at your situation (whether it’s in the gym or not) to do something about it. That won’t come from a therapist. It won’t come from T-members. It’s not going to come from a spotter. It’ll happen the first time you forget that you’re ‘weak’ and actually enjoy life without the failure you’ve pre-built into what you’re doing.

There might be some truth in everything everyone has said here, though only one person actually noticed my request: sports-specific psychology resources.

Check out Randal Strossen’s books. He has 2 on sports psych…specific to lifting.

Other than that, stop being a pussy. No book in the world will help you do that.

This isn’t sports specific, but I recommend you read some Nietzsche, or read about Nietzsche. One of the most inspiring people in all of history.

Every thought and action must be directed towards achieving your goals, if you really want them. It’s the will to power.

When preparing for a lift mindset is everything. Heres what I do. I lay down on the bench and lift the goddamned wieght. I push until it lifts off of the forks, then bring it to my chest, then I push my ass off because I have no spotter. If I fail, I am going to be seriously injured. Maybee even killed.
So I push because my life depends on it. Try that, and remember if you fail,you die!
The only time I even use a spotter is when I am going over my previous max.