I’m definitely in it for the long haul, [/quote]
First off. Don’t say shit like this. Don’t waste your time with thinking long term while you have the following problem:
This is the biggest problem here I can see. (Like was mentioned, getting in physical shape is a GREAT start and a good thing to do. It will also be infinitely simpler than solving the above.) Note the difference between simple and easy. It won’t be easy, neither will finding addressing the above issue, but will be simple as hell. There are such a plethora of ways to lift and eat and have it work, you literally can’t fail if you actually try. Trying is hard, but simple as fuck. You know what I’m saying?
As to fix the above, read and re-read this post until it sinks in:
I’ve spent the last 6 or so months learning how to cook and it’s honestly been one of the best investments in myself I’ve ever made.
Now it isn’t about the cooking. Note the bold part.
You need to drop the hobbies that are basically mental masturbation (video games) until you have direction. Once you have direction, feel free to take breaks crushing the Xbox.
How do you find direction? Lord fucking knows man, but hobbies where you are LEARNING something while you do it, as skill of some kind, will be a good start. I don’t care if it is playing guitar, knitting or physics. Shit you can learn about how the chemicals in your brain react to different drugs (I can pull the name of the book my wife has from undergrad that was a tough fucking read because I had to look up so much shit just to get through it if you’d like.) Doesn’t matter what you’re learning, just be learning. Xbox isn’t learning.
For instance, my two hobbies right now are shooting (and hand loading ammo) and guitar. I’ve been reading up on how pickups work when I’m not playing, and how to make precision rifle rounds when I’m not shooting. I’ve learned more fucking physics than I ever thought I’d ever know from this shit. Electrical “theory” (I have no idea what the actual word is) as well. Point is, I’m not sitting on my ass wasting my life watching shit TV. And this is coming from someone with direction, weekly, monthly, year long, five year and life goals. On top of my goals I also have dreams, that may or may not happen but I’d like to fit them in.
Eventually, you’ll find something you like. If I were you I’d look up something like “how do you code a video game” on youtube and watch videos on how to make the games you play. Then google shit that comes up you don’t understand, and keep digging from there until you find something you like. If you play COD or whatever, google warfare strategy or books on combat and PTSD, etc. Fuck man, if you have netflix watch some documentaries on whatever subject the games you play are on.
Just do something, instead of nothing, with your time.
As long as it’s little 'd" depression and not big “D” depression don’t sweat it. If it’s big D, get on your parents heath plan and go talk to a professional.
More likely it was “work”. Most normal people don’t “like” work. The key is not seeing work as work. Because not being fat is going to take work is why I bring this up.
You use interesting language in this thread. If, deep down, this is a cry for help, but you aren’t ready unless someone digs and digs and proves they care… You won’t find that on the internet. Can’t promise you’ll find it with a Shrink either, but there are people out there that care. I promise. But at the end of the day, you’ll have to meet everyone half way, and do all the work.
I’m drunk and making a lot of assumptions, and i’m not a professional here. So take what I’m saying with a grain of salt. Last time I gave a flying fuck about a dude in one of these threads I was meet with a harsh rebuke of what I was saying to the tune of “this kid is going to have to figure all this out on his own”. So I’m weary of bothering again at this point.