Trump: The Second Year

Ya, you hear it a lot with school in general. It isn’t the school’s job to raise your kid. Yes, they are there a lot. It’s still not their jobs to raise/discipline your kids.

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wu9nTcx

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I won’t get into the daycare vs. stay-at-home parent discussion, but spend time with your kids and pay attention to them - listen to what they’re saying. Also, make sure to involve them in your mundane chores and activities.

Some of my most treasured memories from my childhood are mundane - fixing up an old boat with my dad and my brothers, building a garage…

Modern parents are constantly obsessing about keeping their offspring busy/entertained and forget how much kids soak up by watching and observing regular, day-to-day activities…

Just my two cents.

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Tbh some of my favorite moments with my older daughter is her questioning something and stumping me. She’s just so genuinely curious about the world that shes always asking how/why something works the way it does.

(Love her to death) my wife is notorious for this. She hates being bored herself so she’s always looking to fill empty time slots with something.

I always tell her let them be bored sometimes. Best case scenario it teaches them how to be self sufficient. Worst case it teaches them to not be obnoxious any time they’re bored.

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All solid reasonable points.

I now have a new appreciation for good daycares cause, yes, there are a ton of shitbag parents, and who is going to help keep their kid straight?

Ultimately my answer to this is going to make me sound VERY cynical…

Not every child has a chance. Not every child is going to have potential. Some parents are so bad at what they do, no amount of hard work is going to help them get ahead in life.

I don’t buy into that “any kid can be successful” bullshit. I’ve met 7 year olds that can’t spell their name. My wife volunteers a small amount of time at a local place that does teeth cleanings for kids and low income people.

Kids are like any other animal on the planet. If you surround them with X, they have a high chance of becoming X. Unfortunately that means if you surround a child with shit, they’re likely to become shit

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You were dumb and now you’re not? Congratulations, I’m happy for you.

In fact, my confidence is growing recently as my understanding of how to deals with kids gets better.

My GF’s friendsw brought their kids over last weekend, 3 and 1 yrs old. the 3 yr old was BOUNCING off the walls, which I’m not ok with. Not good for me, us, or the kid. I ask the dad (who I generally like) “Can we bring him to the parkl to blow off some steam”?

“I don’t want to go to the park”

“ok”

A while later I bring the kid outside to our deck for some fresh air and he is doing laps, looks over to the neighbors yard and sees a swingset
“parrkkk”
“Well thats not a park but we can go to one. Do you want to go to the park”?
“YEA”

“Let’s go to the park”
“ok”

Why the fuck, am I the one (not even a QUALIFIED PARENT according to you all here) who has to convince the dad to go to the park?

Go ahead and scoff at my anecdote, I’t a small example of the shit I see and how simple this is. Yes, I know we are talking about one instance, with 1 kid, who is 3 and shit gets really difficult with every passing day until the kid is fully supportive. This is the basic shit that I understand that I see others don’t and again, I’m not a parent. But My parents would never bring me to a friends house with a pile of pent up energy.

This is to address my understanding (of a basic concept, as a non-parent)…nothing really to do with daycare.

I arrive at the same conclusion that my successful parents arrive at.

Not a parrot, great minds think alike.

No, you’re right, my parents don’t have experience with daycare. I was in pre-school, but thats pretty much it.

I was wrong to think that all daycare’s were mills of 100 kids to one irresponsible adult, with nothing but diseases covering all surfaces. And you’ve opened my eyes. Problem is, with better day care comes higher costs, and if we were to get back to the topic, it further incentivize’s (in cases where parents don’t earn enough) a stay-at-home parent.

10 yrs going strong

wheres the blanket statement? I proposed an idea as a litmus test.

I post stronger than I mean to, imagine how the fuck I get through life so well?

It’s no great accomplishment. It’s just something that requires saturation. Itd be like if I told you I know how to fix a car but I’ve never done it before.

Without any other knowledge of this anecdote, a rebuttal is super simple. It’s a power dynamic thing. It’s far more important that the 3 yr old doesn’t question his/her parents than it is to go to the park.

It’s far more important for the kid to start to understand you don’t always get what you want when you want than it is to take them to the park 1 time.

I don’t understand why this matters, let alone why it would be a massive negative to take a kid somewhere when he has pent up energy lol.

Kids almost always have a lot of pent up energy. They’re kids. Not to sound like a dick, but you wouldn’t have made this comment if you were a parent, or hell probably even an uncle

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I put way to much faith in parents, and not enough in the decent day cares that exist.

But again, cost. I’m sure there are parents who would be better off raising their kid than sending them to daycare (cost of day care vs. earnings).

…aaannd there are plenty of kids who would be better off at a daycare than with their parent(s).

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The parents were saying anything.

You don’t always get what you want, of course. I’ve got stories where I had to address this issue as well, cause the parents weren’t doing shit.

I wanted the kid to go to the park more than he wanted to go. At my house, THIS kid gets what he wants :slight_smile:

1000% not trying to sound like a dick, but another statement you definitely wouldn’t hear from anyone that would ever have the knowledge to be called a “good parent” lol.

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If I had a dime for everything I wanted but didn’t get in the last 5 years…

But I’m not gonna get that either, am I?

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I hope not. Get everything you want in life without hearing a No is gonna turn you into Trump.

You’re better than that :wink:

Edit: full circle made it about Trump. You’re welcome PWI

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That’s right, you’re not a qualified parent. But that by no means you’re not good with kids or not an awesome person for kids to hang out with. It sounds like kids enjoy being around you.

To address the other part of this, without knowing what the day had been like so far (or week or month) for either the kid or the dad, it’s impossible to say why the dad said no-dice to going to the park. That kid could’ve been bouncing off the walls all day, even after running all over hell and back. Maybe the dad was up half the night because junior couldn’t sleep. Or maybe the kid’s been a butt all day and screw him if he wants to go to the park.

Point is, until you are actually a parent, you have no idea how you’d react in the same situation. You’ll end up doing stuff, or actually ignoring stuff, that will drive childless people crazy. But you won’t give a fuck.

Kids are beyond awesome. But they’re also a complete pain in the ass and there’s only so much patience to go around.

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Any generalization you’re making about daycare kids is absolute nonsense. I’ve seen the hellions you’re referring to. Some of them went to daycare and others had full time moms.

Some people have different priorities than spending excess time with junior (like providing for junior or teaching junior to deal with other humans, or giving junior a head start in this competitive world).

We chose the choice you’re advocating (keeping wife home with the kids and making do with less). But I’m here to tell you: you have absolutely zero fucking clue what you’re talking about. You spent a few hours with someone else’s kids? Congratulations. You have no clue until you’ve spent 24/7 with the concerns, work and responsibility a parent goes through.

Leave it to Beaver was a great show, but moms work in the real world. And that’s okay. Your priorities are not the same as everyone else’s.

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@carbiduis, Here’s a quick quiz for any prospective parent-

What do you do when your kid walks up to you and says “Here’s something I found in my diaper!”, or worse yet, proudly shows you their art display all over the wall behind the crib that they made while you pondered the peaceful quiet of an undisturbed nights sleep?

Now remember- there are no perfect answers, but there are tons of really bad ones.

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Kinda related: when our oldest was three, I was in our home office and my wife in the kitchen. Son was in the living room. It occurred to me after a few minutes how unbelievably quiet it was. I walk out into the living room, and he’s over halfway down our pale yellow couch with a ballpoint pen, tongue hanging out of his mouth and humming to himself. Remarkably, the dry cleaner managed to get it all out.

Legitimately LOL’d at this

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Too quiet has taken on a Lovecraftian fear in my house.

“I still remember the first time it got quiet. It was early spring, when the crocuses used to bloom. Thats when what the old timers call ‘the fear’ set in. Never did see those crocus again…”

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