I think I’ve had something wrong with my endocrine system since I was a kid. At 5 years old I had hyperhidrosis and excessive sweating 24/7. This lead to an incomplete puberty and basically feeling “fight or flight” the past 30 years. I basically felt like I’ve been full of adrenaline and cortisol my entire life and my sympathetic nervous system is always active. I’m 34 now, and never been laid because I feel tired and anxious all the time - because my sympathetic nervous system is always in over-drive. I thought I had Cushings because my grandfather went from skinny and hairless to a giant balloon with stretch marks, then died of heart failure young.
I went from tall and skinny track athlete to dropping out of highschool I was so tired, to a balloon, with stretch marks, GI bleeding, metabolic syndrome, etc, and saw I was going to die the same way my grandfather did.
Since being on TRT it’s removed visceral fat, fixed lipids, fixed metabolic syndrome, solved GI bleeding and food issues, given me a full “beard” aka pubes on my face, and more body hair.
I messed around with my dose and my TT and FT fell off a cliff and I started feeling pretty bad. I’m going back on 140mg/week and seeing if I stabilize, because my johnson doesn’t work and I feel completely anhedonic and porn does nothing. At least porn or jerkin it worked before TRT, even though I felt ill all the time. Now I feel good, started dating again, and am getting chances to get laid, but now I feel like my arousal system is broken.
I do look a bit more healthier than I did in that 11 month picture now that I re-joined the gym with COVID closures being released. But damn…hormones can ruin your life or save your life. I like my body on TRT now but my mind feels sluggish af and my memory is TRASH. I’m forgetting people’s names I’ve known forever.