T Nation

Trash Talking

[quote]blok wrote:
most recent one…

i dont know if anyone remembers my thread about the fat guy trying to watch me do dead lifts (long story)

but my favorite part was when i was leaving his fat ass made a smart remark and i replied… “why would i listen to some fat fuck that cant see his own dick” everyone around just kinda stood there and i walked out.[/quote]

Yea Bro, I was around for that and I applauded you at the time of the post. Whatever happened with that dude? Has he been in the gym at the same time as you since?

I wouldn’t fuck you for pactice is one of my faves

[quote]Iron Beast wrote:
When I was at school I had just broken up with my girlfriend of 1 year. She didn’t like the fact that I had dumped her so she decided to sit next to me in class and hound me.

She kept saying “You’re a cunt”, you’re this, you’re that and basically trying to get me to crack. Everyone could hear what she was saying.

I let it go for about half an hour and she goes the original “You’re a cunt.”

I turned to her and whispered “Okay, it took you 12 months to work out that I’m a cunt. All it took for me was one look at you and I realized you had no tits.”

She got up threw a book at me and launched her fists of fury. Not one punch landed but the fact nobody heared what I said mad her look somewhat mad. The teacher kicked her out of the class and sent home for the day. It’s good to have a win.[/quote]

Nice. She over-stepped her boundaries, and left herself (flat chest) exposed for a verbal jab.

Joe Rogan tourching some heckler

To a flat chested chick:

“The joke I’m about to tell you is so funny that your tits might fall off… uhm, but I see that you know this one allready.”

Once in a course at the uni some pretty good loking girl, who sat one seat in front of me, went to the toilet. When she came back to ther place she had this smile of relief on her face, then I asked:

  • So, have you had a good shit?

She turned beetroot red and everybody nearby bursted out in laughter.

Again in a course at the uni; dialog between two guys I sat nearby:

Gloomy looking guy: Man, I’m so depressed. I slept so awfull…
Other guy interrupts him: Why, what happened? Did your teddybear die?!

I was fucking laughing with tears in my eyes.

Ok, I have to come clean. My half-cabbage story is an old joke that I retold in the 1st person.

I can’t believe no one called me out on it. (Except for one private message…)

I did work in a produce store once, but the only thing I learned there is that after placing the Jalapenos on display, you should THOROUGHLY wash your hands before going to the bathroom and touching your dick.

Anything I say when drunk is intelligent, witty, sarcastic and true.

edit
Too bad I can never remember anything I said.