Trainers: Stupid Client Comments...

We’ve all heard some idiotic stuff come out of our clients mouths. Without disclosing any names, what are the dumbest things you’ve heard since you started your career?

I heard something tonight that got me thinking about all the crazy stuff I’ve heard in my 9 years as a trainer.

During a very light (15 rep) standing barbell press; “This is too heavy, my back is already too big and my shirts are too tight, I don’t need to get my back any bigger”.

My reply was this; “Well, your back isn’t getting bigger by training two days per week”. Forget the fact that she was doing a SHOULDER exercise and that she does a total of 4 sets for back per week and she doesn’t even approach failure!

I have much more but I gotta get some sleep.

darn women and their insane muscle building genetics.

I am not a trainer but when I was doing a deadlift a lady came up to me and said she only does the thigh machines (because the thigh muscles are the strongest muscle in the body, she said) and light weights because she wants to avoid muscle strain and tendon fatigue…

Sugar can’t make you fat because it doesn’t have any fat in it.

I’ve got about a million.

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:

I have yet to ask him about it for fear of losing my cool.
Bushy[/quote]

You should ask him what he thought of what you said. Don’t sweat it but sometimes people just forget or can’t figure out how to do it right again.

It took a few days to show somebody how to deadlift without hunching their back completely over. He actually was trying but just couldn’t get it. You’ll be surprised how some people just can’t control their body.

I was at a wedding recently when a girl i have been training told everyone that I’d made her fat, by doing Alwyn Cosgrove style compound complexes…

You did that yourself dear, in the kitchen

[quote]legend wrote:
I was at a wedding recently when a girl i have been training told everyone that I’d made her fat, by doing Alwyn Cosgrove style compound complexes…

You did that yourself dear, in the kitchen

[/quote]

More like Haagen Daasz compound complexes. Or Domino’s Pizza compound complexes.

[quote]legend wrote:
I was at a wedding recently when a girl i have been training told everyone that I’d made her fat, by doing Alwyn Cosgrove style compound complexes…

You did that yourself dear, in the kitchen

[/quote]

I know I hate it when I get fat by working out.

In a semi-related note… I saw an old client of mine (actually a hot ex-track athlete) at a wedding the other night. She reminded me how I pleaded with her NOT to run the Boston Marathon a few years back. She said she wished she had listened to me because now BOTH her knees are “junk” as she called it from all the pounding.

She also suprised me by telling me she had called Gold’s Gym (my old workplace)looking for me while she was actually on the starting line of her first marathon and wanted some inspirational words from me. The desk girl refused to come get me because as she was told; “He’s out on the floor right now and can’t talk”. Stupid desk girls.

Anyway, off-topic but the whole marathon “thing” just makes me crazy.

I know what makes people fat. Its not Sugar, or Fat itself. I am almost 100% sure its Stupidity!

“Look, I don’t come here to look like Arnold or anything, just work out”

I had to bite off my tongue to keep from replying:“Ya, like you could even if you tried…”

@Bushy: I swear, this guy has an identical twin here. Does EVERY movement in a semi-retarded, 1/8 ROM way that drives me crazy.

I saw one of the personal trainers at my gym having this old guy do “partials”. It drove me almost insane, because the guy wasn’t even doing anything near the range of motion of a partial!! This dumbass trainer had him doing one set of every machine, while talking to him!! Needless to say, I shook my head and pitied the poor old fool for wasting his money.

Failed 1ce on a 1rm deadlift went for it one last time when i’m getting my hands all set up and getting focused…

“Hey man do you want me to spot you in your squat?”
Me:“You mean my deadlift?”
“Oh yea thats what I meant I can push on your chest and then on the back of your hips to give you good leverage”
Me:“Honestly I’ve never heard of that so no man”
“Alright well I don’t wnat to fuck you up or anything but if you need me I’ll help out”

I had had the this roommate that I workout out with a few times. Biggest idiot I have ever met hands down and a horrible violent person who could not handle drugs.

He said and this was in 2000 "Hey man. I don’t want to get huge like Ronnie Colman but I’d like to be like Jay Cutlers size. (keep in mind this is 2000)

He was skinny a hell yet he thought he was huge. He would go around the house flexing and talking shit to me and my other roommates. I had to move out because I was going to beat him to death.

I am serious about him being the biggest idiot I’ve ever met and I’ve met some stupid ones. Everyone I knew who knew him agreed.

[quote]Fitnessdiva wrote:
Sugar can’t make you fat because it doesn’t have any fat in it.

I’ve got about a million.[/quote]

That’s golden!

[quote]Clark Banner wrote:
I know what makes people fat. Its not Sugar, or Fat itself. I am almost 100% sure its Stupidity![/quote]

I can see it now…

“New Cheetos!! now with 50% less stupid!”

[quote]MidDistanceMac wrote:
Failed 1ce on a 1rm deadlift went for it one last time when i’m getting my hands all set up and getting focused…

“Hey man do you want me to spot you in your squat?”
Me:“You mean my deadlift?”
“Oh yea thats what I meant I can push on your chest and then on the back of your hips to give you good leverage”
Me:“Honestly I’ve never heard of that so no man”
“Alright well I don’t wnat to fuck you up or anything but if you need me I’ll help out”

[/quote]

He was hitting on you. :stuck_out_tongue:

As far as stupid quotes, I don’t really have any original ones to add. Just the usual “but, I don’t want to get too big”. The other day I did have this newbie guy come up to me and ask me a bunch of questions about exercises. I answered them as concisely as I could, as I realized that he was a newbie and wanted to set him on the right track.

He then asked me for some exercises to work his traps. I told him “shrugs and rows are good, upright rows work as well. But, personally I feel that Deadlifts and Rack deadlifts are the best.” To which he replied “oh, I can’t do deadlifts, my chiropractor says they’re bad for your back.”

Seriously, what is it with people who are supposed to be in the health field (doctors, chiros, PT’s (physical therapists) not having a clue about exercise, and being completely misinformed about certain exercises in particular?

[quote]derek wrote:
Anyway, off-topic but the whole marathon “thing” just makes me crazy.[/quote]

More off topic:

I find that incredibly silly. Humans have amazing adaptability – we can attain incredibly strength, impressive vertical jumps, extreme flexibility, or astounding endurance.

Active people choose to engage in that which they are passionate about. Marathons are a test of speed and endurance. People that finish all 26.2 miles in three hours have contributed extreme dedication to training and recovery aspects of their lives. They spend more time running than most of us spend in the gym so that they can achieve a competitive time.

I began running to lose weight and ultimately went on to run in the 2005 Seattle Marathon which I hold as an incredible personal accomplishment. Now I’m a weightlifting trainee, but I still have respect for the sport of distance running because I know how much dedication is required to succeed. Furthermore, I’m glad that there are people pushing all boundaries of human limits – it’s inspirational.

to set things up I train for strongman comps…

friend asked me what time I “work out” at

ME: I start training around 5-6 PM

Friend: “Oh I don’t want to do any of that training stuff, I just want to lift weights.”

WTF do you think I am doing?