T Nation

To The Vixens

Two questions to the Vixens as I’ve been looking at a friend “wine and pine” anonymously over a little hottie in the gym:

1)What do you guys think (ESPECIALLY if it has happened to you before)of a guy who sends things anonymously? (Provided they are pretty innocent, not weird in tone, and aren’t sent with letters cut and pasted from magazines?). Would you think the guy a wuss? Sweet? Or…dammit…why doesn’t he SPEAK UP?

2)The Fitness and Bodybuilding women have often lamented on how a physically strong woman (ESPECIALLY if she is a hottie!) are VERY intimidating to a lot of men. Many go on to say that they shouldn’t be. What do you think? (I have to tell you on a personal note…I think that Timea Morajova, or Amy Fahdali, or Monica Brant would probably leave even the Lion searching for the right words to say! Sometimes you ladies CAN be intimidating!)

3)To the guys. Ever seen a famous hottie (or not-so-famous!)hooked up with some “loser” (whatever your definintion is) and you said "WTF…!!! Some say the key is “confidence”. The guy took the chance and won. (I think T.C. had an “Atomic Dog” on this very subject. Anybody remember which one it was?)

So…your thoughts?

I scored way over my head when I first started dating the women who is now my wife. We met at the gym. She was far and away the hottest girl who trains there. She’s 5’7, 135lbs and built like some of the more muscular fitness models. She is also stunningly beautiful and without a doubt the best person I have ever known. How did I score so far over my head? We talked a few times at the gym until I got up the nerve to ask her if she wanted to train together some time. After that we became training partners and within a few months a romance began. What is my point?, she had not been on a date in two years. Every guy was too intimidated to ask her out. She would have gone out with any decent guy who would have asked. After we started dating many of the guys at the gym would ask me how I was lucky enough to end up with her. My response is always “simple, I just asked”. It doesn’t matter how hot the girl is, she’s gotta date someone. Why not you. My advice to guys is to take a chance, be polite and confident without being cocky and just ask. I would like to hear Patricia’s take on this. I’ve seen her picture and she definately qualifies as a “physically stong woman who’s a hottie”.

for #2: Being a former rower, I have no problem with girls who are about 6’-6’2" & ~175lbs. There’s that muscle girl in my classes who won’t stop talking to me on msn messenger just because I asked her about her routine one day instead of cowering like the rest of the guys.
for #3: I can’t understand that either. There’s this guy from high school who used to sit in the student lounge with his idiot friends & trip people as they walked by & he’s had the same super hot (according to lots of others-not me though) girlfriend since then (4 years I guess). I guess he was the only one who tried hard enough or maybe he’s different when he’s with her.

mufasa, i know what your going through. at my gym, every saturday the ‘fitness’ girls (10-20 retarded hot females age 18-40 considering competing in fitness) train with two pro fitness/divas. most of the guys at my gym are to intimadated, but the couple who took the chances are now banging the hottest girl they will ever see naked (in person.) i say dont do the anonymous thing, go up and talk to her. or make the eye contact for a few days and she will be dying to talk to you. good luck bro and let us know how it works out. (hopefully i didnt misinterpret your situation.)

magnus: Oh m’god - that’s so nice! T’ank you. Oh and I think Ko agrees with you looking over at Ko - wink, wink.

Mufasa, for your #1: I would say - uh, is this high school? Go over and talk to the girl. At least tell your friend that.

#2: Yup, been there. For three years I didn't date AT ALL. Most of it was by choice. I just didn't want to waste my time dealing with that "stuff". I wanted to work on art school, work, my own goals, etc. However, I do find that most guys will not approach a woman whom they consider "untouchable". One word of advice: just do it. The best thing to say to ANYONE is "hi". That's a start. Most strong women do the same (approach people w/out fear), it's kind of refreshing to see others who are as confident. Man or woman. BTW: most strong women who are considered to be hotties, don't see themselves as that way. Not at all.

I was with someone for seven years - 2 1/2 of them being married. After I told him it was over and was leaving him (for various reasons), it was Ko who helped me move out. Ko was my friend for many years before I left my now-ex. He has proven himself to be a exceptional person with the utmost values. We had been sparring partners and he helped me when I had begun karate. We have much in common (interests). He also made the first move. Of course, this was after I had been on my own for awhile. I wasn't aware of any "attraction" on his part. Up until that time, we were mostly "drinking buddies" and many thought we were brother and sister. Nevertheless, he had the gumption. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Guys just need to take that chance. It's certainly no sure thing. You might get burned. But you might be surprised. BUT you will never know until you take that chance.

Not regarding celebrities, I think that every dude who is going out with a girl I would potentially want is a loser…don’t matter who he is, if he’s got her, he’s a loser and I’m the fucking man who should be nailing her.

T.C. let me know where to find the “Atomic Dog” I was looking for:

Issue 151; “Take A Shot”


The Lion’s curiosity is tweaked now, Pat! :)—!!!

Is your pic on the Internet?

Mufasa, you said it. Be Confident! There’s another thread where some guy is experimenting with being a jerk to women in order to get more action. I almost posted, but thought better of it as what works for me, couldn’t work for everybody. But for the lion? I’d definitely chime in.

All that being said, I never approach women. I don’t want to be lumped in with all the jerks that tried to pick her up. I figure that women are so gun shy these days that they’d rather not have the attention.

Maybe I need to change my outlook on things.

So much for nice guys finishing last. I think Magnus said it better than I could. It starts with a hello, and if its meant to happen it will.

Uh, it took me a bit, but I found it. My pic was posted in the T-Mag issue #194 Reader Mail. I certainly didn’t think it would be posted, it was included so that they could see I wasn’t a slouch. That I actually trained and “stuff”.

  1. It would be cute…once. Then I would expect an actual introduction. More than once would be very very weird.

2. I'm pretty well built, not a 'hottie' though. I was once told, by I guy I was friends with (and I had SUCH a crush on!) that he found me intimidating. I felt SO bad, and pressed him for an explaination. He told me he thought that because I can take care of myself, I'm not a 'delicate flower', and I speak my mind and am not shy about it. That's a parapharase of about 3 hours of talking but it all boiled down to that. (I spent a long time thinking about it and decided that I just needed to find stronger men who could handle me and wouldn't let me push them around.)

Female body builders often seem very self confident and sure of themselves, weither that is true or not is another issue. I think guys find that intimidating because they may not have the upper hand.