T Nation

Threatening Neighbor

My neighbor the a hole threatens my wife yesterday because she called the police when he started bouncing his wife off the wall. My apt. managment seems oblivious to this whole suituation. If this guy makes a move or his gangbaning son in law does what are my options that will not get me in jail. I live in sunny Las Vegas , Henderson NV actually. I went out and bought a gun, 2 aluminum bats, and mace yesterday just in case something happens. I know enough ju jitsu and used to bounce at a pretty tough club back in Cambridge Ma. to mess them both up hand to hand but the ease in getting a gun out here worries me. I told my wife I rather have a gun and not need it then need a gun and not have it to quote “True Romance”. I am looking into getting on the Seattle Police force and do not want to have to do anything to hurt my chances but I love my wife and the thought of some meth snorting wife beater hurting her makes me want hurt the a hole badly.

I have my CCW permit in Arizona and here you have to feel your life or someone elses life is in mortal danger with no other way to escape for it to be a clean shoot. Remember you need to prove this to a jury of your peers. If something like this happenend your chances getting on with a PD will be slim. In the end, protecting you and your family is the most inportant thing and if it was truly self defense it should come out good in the end. Best of luck, Thad

Be careful Bro. Even a shooting, where you are in the right, will cost you Thousands to defend yourself against.

Escalating force. Warning first, then non-lethal, finally the gun. That is defensible and the right thing to do. Throw the bats out or use them for softball. A bat is a weapon for a criminal and that’s how you’ll be viewed if you use one. Self-Defense or not.

Consider moving if it’s that bad. A lot cheaper in the long run.

Bye the way. Calling the PD on a guy beating his wife is the right thing to do. A guy who beats on his woman is a piece of shit in my book.

How exactly did he threaten your wife?

I feel for you and I hope this situation ends peacefully, happily and quickly.

Re: the bats, my advice is to find 2 sturdy sticks and use those if, G_d forbid, it comes to violence. A lot more innocent-looking than an aluminum baseball bat and you can dispose of them anywhere.

I truly feel that having good neighbors is one of the most imp’t things one can have. I can’t imagine what its like to have to go home every day and worry about the persons living next to you…

I second the moving advice btw. You can prob also back out of the lease with no penalty since it is a dangerous living situation. And if you lose the deposit, it’s money well spent. As an ex-bouncer, i’m sure you know violence is always the last resort.

btw, what club was it back in MA? Oh, and the NYPD is ALWAYS hiring. They’re holding exams 2-3x a year now.

That sucks.

All I can say is stay in control.

By that I mean of yourself and the situation. The last thing you need is for something to happen when drunk and partying, because it can go very bad too easily – through no real fault of your own.

If you and the wife plan on getting ripped for New Years, consider doing it at an event, such as a hotel or something. Then you don’t have to take a chance of the asshole pushing you at the wrong time.

It’s not right that you have to take these steps, arm yourself, or whatever, but do what you can to be in shape to deal with anything if it were to arise and to make sure nothing can arise when you aren’t able to deal with it.

As others suggested, nothing wrong with moving either. Once it isn’t just yourself and the family is involved, things change.

I see two options,

Get a restraining order and let the legal system handle it. If he is a wife beater, he should be in jail.

or

Move.

When she started to leave the apt. he started calling her a bitch and said she’d pay if she called the cops on him again. The mgt. at my complex said its hard to get a eviction especially where they have been there a while. The courts told me I can give them a 14 day notice to solve the problem then break my lease and sue my landlord for moving costs and my security deposit. I came to Nevada to rebuild after two tough years in Seattle and I am not fiscally able to move right now.

You do realize this could be the court’s “court exhibit A”. Guns and bats for this fellow.

I have been involved with social services and that department for years. And if there is one thing I have learned is women will not leave the men that hurt them. Especially when drugs are involved. It will come back and she will blame it on you.

If there are kids in the mix, then it is worth it. Take that risk. Get the kids out. The woman will stay. I see it all the time.

If no kids are involved, then she has made peace with her life. Trying to save her is like trying to save a drunk from the bottle. A junkie from the needle. They know it will hurt or kill them. But they love it too much. She loves him too much.

The a-hole sounds like a typical wife beater.A whole lot of balls when it comes to handling women, but hides from men.That being the case you should start by establishing that there is a problem with the local police, let them do what they can,and if it comes to a face to face with him, he will back down. If he doesn’t, crush him like a grape. Just don’t break any of his bones, that looks bad.