T Nation

The Flame-Free Confession Thread II


#585

They should be nice and tender by now then !!!


#586

They melt like butter


#587

Won a $50 giftcard/participation trophy to Starting Strongman. Trying to figure out what to buy with it on their site, they have alot of cerberus and spud inc products. I hope you are all super jealous.


#588

I’ve got a bunch of pullups and pressups pencilled in for this evening since I want to get better at them and get some extra upper body volume in.

However I’ve just damn near sliced the tip of my finger off making dinner. Does anyone have any self-defence tips for when an angry girlfriend attacks you for getting blood all over the spare bedroom? Asking for a friend.


#589

Theres extra space in my shower if you need it to cry. Thats usually what I do.


#590

Kick to the vag and run.


#591

@mattjp, I should add, if she is more upset after the kicking, you apologize, say you are feeling hormonal and you think it’s because of your period (see blood in room) - she’ll get that


#592

Or, if she hasn’t seen where that blood comes from yet, you can just stare at her holding the knife and say, “shut up or you’ll be the next one.”


#593

Just Emperor’s New Clothes it and act like you don’t see the blood. It helps to get friends to come over and also agree that they don’t see blood.


#594

Spud make good stuff. I’d get a big ray strap.


#595

If it was me…

$50 voucher + black friday = cheap truck pull simulator


#596

haha Im lucky enough to have access to actual trucks to pull


#597

Buddy at work asked if I was going to keep working there since my wife has gotten such a large merit increase. Along with the one promised next year when she will bring in triple of what I do. Sadly I said yes. I pointed out there was no amount of house cleaning food cooking or orgasm providing where she would entertain that idea.


#598

Did you try telling her you would do this for only her if you could leave your job?


#599

Her motto is if she’s working my ass is working lol . Trust me she hates it when I take my paid vacation days from work. Told her I could be her trophy husband or boy toy.


#600

Life Goals


#601

Leave the job, put a few hogs in the backyard and tell her you’re a farmer now!


#602

If that isn’t bringing home the bacon, then what is?


#603

I tried this and she said I was closer to a participation medal. I haven’t worked out if that is more insulting to me or her.


#604

Damn straight!

@FlatsFarmer @SkyzykS
well I would offer her all the “pork” she could handle.

Yeah… I mention to my wife about my ability to breath through my ears and she rolled her eyes