T Nation

The Flame-Free Confession Thread II


@OTHSteve I don’t think it’s possible for me to regress any farther back than I already have…my squat went down by like 100 pounds lol. My bench also went down by 35-40 pounds.

@kd13 I’m seeing actual food in the toilet, so it really doesn’t make sense for me to try to gain weight. None of my food is actually digesting. But if I stop training, I’m just gonna hate myself even more than I do now. Whatever, I’ll figure it out I guess


When I used to coach track guys, I always said to work the steps, and focus on baby step progress. The outcomes happen if you do that. If it’s all about the results immediately - you don’t get em - you get hurt and stalled - and regress. Day at a time like anything. I have been reckless with diet, drinking, and smoking for years. I’m halfway smoking a cigarette at this moment (not proud) but I worked my other steps (diet and workout) today. And tomorrow I will nail all 3. And then I’m onto the next day. Progress not perfection.


I haven’t been in the gym in several weeks. I’ve lost almost 19 pounds, down to 179 at 6’1". Got on a yoga binge for a while, but only doing that a few times a week now.

Max squat was 290, doubt I could squat 185 now. Look skinny AF.

Don’t care.

I was whacked about the gym for a few years, like ten, but it holds no interest for me now. I liked being jacked, but feel better being lean.

No confession I guess, just being an old dude and getting more comfortable in my skin. Guess I should post something about this in the woo woo thread.


I’ve got a similar attitude as I keep gaining weight. Hitting PRs is great but occasionally I reminisce about my first couple years getting into lifting when I was still running frequently too.

I think I’m going to make lifting the main focus for the next 5-10 years to see how strong I can get before I’m too old to hit new PRs then play the overall fitness game and just feel better in general. Maybe pick up some new things like yoga, rock climbing, martial arts.


Do what feeds your soul, and fuck everybody else.

Just had that conversation with my daughter, who is racked with anxiety at 15 years old.


You’re not bed ridden! It could get worse in terms of physical capabilities. Just like they said - baby steps.

If training is what gives you a mental break from the day then keep doing it. There are times when you have to let go of the numbers and it sounds like you’re in one of those moments (I am too).

This is kind of cliché and easier said than done, but focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t.


Thanks man.


What do you guys think of Clarence Kennedy?


Here’s a cautionary tale of 2 1/2 months of doing fuck-all in the gym and eating like crap.

October 2018, a little too much padding but strongman competition ready:

January 1st 2019, fat-ass slob:


I think he high bar squats mid-600s ass to grass, and is a ridiculous oly lifter. Also seems like a pretty humble guy and a hard worker. Why, what do YOU think of him?


Actually I understated it, he high bar squats 675 ass to grass, paused, with no belt or knee sleeves.


Oh he’s a beast!! Strong as shit for a recreational lifter. I think he’s one of the few guys that really shows how far the basics, hard ass work, and genetics can take you.


Yeah, I enjoy his videos. He’s not afraid of big weight, and he’s crazy strong. Translate his 675 squat to a low-bar, wide stance, barely parallel squat and I couldn’t even tell you what his numbers would be. Of course, he may just be built for that type of squatting, but that level of hip and ankle mobility, plus quad strength, will transfer more easily to low-bar squatting than the other way around.


You may become the most popular dad in school…


For sure man! Still don’t understand how someone can Low bar. I’ve tried and it’s too awkward for me. I’m just built for high bar and front squats. Every time I try a low bar I feel like I gotta take a dump LOL :joy:


You know what genuinely bothers me?

All those super rich movie stars (super rich people in the entertainment industry in general I guess) who promote issues related to poverty or financial/economic inequality.

Can that be considered an oxymoron?


I understand why powerlifters do this. The entire goal of their sport is to lift the heaviest weight possible. If that requires you to rest until you’re fully ready, then you rest until you’re fully ready.

What makes them entitled is thinking that they can do this in a public gym where there are many people wanting to use the same equipment.

At a basic level, that is that entitlement means- thinking that your needs go before another’s.

I think others would find me entitled for doing circuit training and hog DB/BBs for about 10-30 minutes too.

This stuff is a rabbit-hole man. The more you think about it, the deeper you go.


How many times have you asked to work in and been told no?


Quit often.


Sorry, I wasn’t quite clear on my question…
How many times have you asked to work in?
How many times have you been told no?