Do you remember when all one needed was an uncalloused hand to get off? However, that soon became boring and those breast cream ads in the back of Cosmo seemed so erotic. And what about Victoria’s Secret? Laeticia Casta looked damn sultry in her lingerie.
Of course, the world of online porn opened new doors for every red-blooded American male. But Jenny McCarthy’s Playboy spreads weren’t enough, were they? Nudity became passe. Soon, one needed lesbians, office sex, and orgies to satisfy himself. Yes, I remember the good old days. How I’d love to be able to pleasure myself without running a tab at “Amazing Video” or waiting for a 30 second clip of Ron Jeremy fucking Wendy Whoppers to download. Oh, dear.