Well, it’s cheat day here at pooh’s house. While stuffing my whole with Captain Crunch this morning, an interesting question popped in my head: what’s the most calories I’ve ever eaten in one sitting? I mean, in a matter of minutes. Not a holiday.
For me, well, that’s easy: The summer of 01’. I was ripped. It was the last night of our annual Myrtle Beach vacation. We were cruising the southern strip when, all of a sudden, that heavenly glow of the Krispy Kreme “Hot Doughnuts Now” light penetrated my dark, deprived dieter’s cerebral cortex. I yell to my father, “Pull this vehicle over at once old man!” He complies. I walk in and yell at the traditional 300 pd overweight KK employee “Cease and Assist Tank A$$!” She complies. Within 7-10 minutes pooh had consumed 16, yes, that’s right, 16 pipe’in hot KK glazed doughnuts, 2 of which were the orgasmic lemon-filled.
All told, at 210 cals each and the filled weighing in at about 350 a piece, I consumed about 3500 calories in a matter of seconds, including milk.
Within an hour, seratonin was spewing out of all of my bodily orifices, similar to a Mt. Fuji eruption.
Look at it this way:
when the leptin drops and subcutaneous is depleted, your body is primal
I have burried easily 1 whole bag of baked tostitos, and a half gallon of Edy’s fat free frozen yogurt in a matter of hours, along with two turkey-pastrami sandwiches…my stomach was bloaded so bad that night i couldn’t sleep…of course, i was aghast at my body the next day, due to water retention and the like.
One July 4th when i was literally starving myself (unknowingly) i must have put away say 7,000kcal easily.
I discuss the art of the binge in my article which is available for preview
34 homemade, oatmeal chocolate chip cookies,4 chocolate bars and 1/2 gallon of cookie dough ice cream in one Sunday afteroon and evening. At some point I actually stopped enjoying the food and just kept eating cause it was a refeed day. Sick!
I have a friend who’s eaten over 30 ice cream sandwhiches in an evening.
As for myself, well… one of the worst was probably Thanksgiving '01, where I ate all the usual Turkey-day stuff, then went over to a friends house and ate 1.75 batches of homemade cookie dough.
I have to agree…a $35 Mickey-D’s meal is unbelievable. I thought spending $20 or so was as bad as one could get.
My daily calorie record is around 9000 at a weight of 160 (pre-binge of course). My meal record is a dozen Krispy Kreme assorted doughnuts, a box of cocoa krispies, a sleeve of Chips Ahoy cookies, two king size Reeses Peanut Butter cups as well as Hershey’s bar w. almonds and two Choc. Graham Cracker MetRx bars. This was done in under 1 hour and put me to sleep for about four hours.
Fast food record: a large serving of spaghetti/meat sauce, 12 breadsticks w. a side of garlic butter, three slices strawberry cheesecake, a super-size double qtr. pounder w. cheese extra value meal and a large Reeses McFlurry. $24 between the two, but still nowhere near the $35 mark. All of the above eaten in approx. 30 minutes or less.
Mine was definitely last summer. I ordered a full rack of ribs and fixin’s in Memphis after a big mess of fried tomatoes. It’s very fortunate to arrive in the Barbeque Holy Land on cheat day; I cleaned my plate faster than a car can get stripped at the mall there. I heard Elvis say, “May the sauce be with you.” The waitress was stunned when I finished and asked her for another entire rack. I ate that too along with tons of bread and baked beans. I have not been able to come close to this since. That’s probably a good thing.
I’d say I came close to Teddy two years ago on July 4th…i probably put away close to 9000kcal…either way, i couldn’t sleep b/c I felt like my stomach might explode
Vain
WOW, I thought I was bad. After a fight one time I ate five smore sandwiches with whole hershey almond bars inside each one, with plenty of marshmellows, a big bowl of oatmeal with pudding powder and tons of peanut butter, then a whole pizza, followed that with the biggest glass of Bailey’s irish cream mixed with Reeses peanut butter ice cream! It hurt that night to roll over. But Dang, you boys can eat!
If only I had some pics taken the day of the 9,000 calorie fiasco (and I kid you not, it was 9,000)…After finally waking from about a four hour insulin-induced coma, I could barely get up off the couch. My face was unbelievably swollen and I had so much water retention going that I felt like rigor mortis was setting in. I don’t know what was worse, that or the next day when I set another record for most restroom visits in a day peeing out all that extra water!
Thank the lord that I don’t do that too often or I’d have to get a second job to support my “food habit.”
On a related note, since we’re talking about records, what’s the most you’ve spent on fast food (only fast food, not groceries or candy bars etc) in a week, and restaurants don’t count, I’m talking McD’s, BurgerKing, Taco Bell etc? Mine sits at aprox. $225 which was achieved almost exactly a year ago. Ouch, huh?
Teddy: All I can think about is Fat Bastard, man. LOL! Seriously, though, Tedster, I could hang with you without reserve. So, I think we should wreak some havoc on an all-you-can-eat sometime. Hell, I think the T-Crew should rent out an all-you-can-eat and put that place under!
Man, you guys crack me up. Goldberg, I was laughing like crazy with you, bro. I don’t know, why, but I could just see your face when you typed that.
I’m not really up for posting any of my festivities right now, basically 'cause my memory is tired. But, I know a few years back when I was working landscaping and eating like a bird on Body-for-Life protocol, Sundays were my free day…and, man, from the time I woke up until the time I passed out, I spent the entire day in the kitchen eating pure junk food.
I feel you on that Timbro. When I was BFLing it, I got had it down to a science.
OK, so we all know B. Phillips said you were allowed one cheat day per week while on the program, right? Well, being in college, I didn’t want to have any classes on my cheat day (taking up valuable eating time), so I also chose Sunday.
And being in college, I was always going out on Saturday nights (like most nights). So, when midnight hit saturday night (that’s 12 am sunday aka the offical start of the cheat day), I was off to the races. I normally had some cookies and candy bars stowed away for the beginning, and then would have pizza by the slice or great steak once the bars closed. Then, I would have the whole next day to cheat to my hearts content.
Mmmmm, scamming the system so it was like having two cheat days.
My biggest binge was probably a bag or Santitas corn chips with an 8oz container of french onion dip followed by a pint of Edy’s dreamery new york strawberry cheesecake ice cream.
I think that totals around 3500 calories.
Ok, I’ll never top the amazing quantity of food that Joel told me about when he was originally testing out the Cheater’s Diet. Both Cressey and I felt sick after reading the list, so I hope Joel pops on this thread so that we can all see how crazy a session can actually be.
My recent best is not too impressive, but it’s at least worth mentioning. This was last summer, when I was doing Renegade training and had just started a new job and was not getting enough calories in.
2 IN-N-OUT Double Doubles
2 Orders of fries (these are not small fries either)
7 Krispey Kreme Donuts
3 16 oz glasses of milk (nonfat of course)
Total - 3800 calories
It’s mildly comforting to see that even with an all out binge, 3600 calories is not too devastating.
WOWWWW!! Those were all astounding numbers. The most I ever put down was a gallon of ice cream with a steak and potato dinner. Can’t hold a flame to you all.