T Nation

Talking to Your Kids About AAS

[quote]Jelly Roll wrote:
So this is something I’ve been thinking about lately, and I’d appreciate some feedback from all you guys. Me and the wife just got back from the ultrasound today (this is baby number 5 for us, by the way), and we were doing the usual question/answer routine with all the kids afterwards.

But the questions are getting more complicated as they get older (the two oldest are 12 and 11, then 9 and 2), and I’m expecting “Dad, have you ever taken steroids?” someday in the next couple of years now that highschool is around the corner.

We’re pretty up-front and honest with our kids about most everything, and we try to give them enough information at home to compensate for their school “education”. But, at the same time I don’t want to open that can of worms before they’re mature enough to talk about it (and not tell all their friends that their Dad is on “the juice”), however I don’t want to be a hypocrite with my kids.

My wife and I don’t drink, drug, or smoke, so we ‘walk the talk’ when it comes to that stuff, BUT I do use AAS… At what age do you think it would be ok to talk to your kids about responsible AAS use?

Thanks,
Jelly [/quote]

I thought steroids made your balls permanently shrink and cause impotence…HOW ARE YOU HAVING MORE KIDZ??? lol

I would say be honest with them about it when you feel they are mature enough for it. Explain your views on the subject openly and honestly. But still be firm with them about you will not accept them using until they are mature/old/training expereinced enough…

Furious George: You have to come clean with your wife, as I guarantee you that she already at least suspects, but most likey knows. If your wife can’t accept what you do, then you need a new wife, as using aas and the choice to do so goes right down to the soul and moral compass of an individual. If she cannot see things the way you do then eventually down the road the ‘differences in views’ will ruin your marriage, as it will be like you are living with your mom - sneaking around all the time. - definitely doesn’t foster the big ‘T’ work (trust).

Jelly: My experience is this: don’t volunteer any information. You have been working out for years, and that is why you are so big. Tell them if you like when they are in their twenties, but by then they’ll likely not care even to ask.

Educate them if they ask that steroids should be avoided at all costs. Let them know that it is a short cut and that it can cause stunting of growth, masculinizing effects in women e.t.c. Let them know that you worked out long before they were a twinkle in their mother’s eye, and that hard work, consistency, and dedication pays off.

Great thread. My kids are too young to ask about it at the moment. I will probably lie untill they are mature enough but I hate lying. But with the stigma attached to it in the media and mainstream opinion what is the choice really?

I hate hiding it from friends too but they are as uneducated as the masses. TRT at the very least would help the older ones. I’m glad Stallone came forth with it though I doubt he is only using “replacement” amounts.

I feel like an hypocrite cause I eat very clean and strive for better health so if people found out about my AAS use it woud make all the rest I’m doing look like bullshit.

Deep down, I do feel the stigma associated with AAS will slowly go away since you cant stop an army of Babyboomers loaded with money that refuse to grow old! Also, people will kinda guess that all those athletes are not dying left and rignt, and that maybe the side effects are a tad exagerated…

My wife is very cool with my steroid use, but we’d been talking about it for 2 years prior to my first cycle. I shared all the information I was learning with her, while I was doing my research, so when I started my first cycle she was very supportive. She’s never given me any grief over it, and has since gotten very interested in GH and melanotan2 for herself. I couldn’t imagine trying to hide anything from her really.

Regarding kids, the general consensus seems to be to wait until they’re older, and that makes sense to me. If they ask before then, I’ll explain to them the consequences of AAS use/abuse, but nothing more. The reality is, I don’t think my kids are as mature as Rainjack’s, so I’ve got to be more careful.

Kids are very impressionable, they want to be like us, whether we act in a positive or negative way. Like several guys on here have said before me, I remember what I was like as a teenager… The last thing I want is my son/daughters using my anadrol because they know dad does it.

Thanks again to everybody for the advice.

Jelly

This post was flagged by the community and is temporarily hidden.

[quote]Prisoner wrote:
Furious George: You have to come clean with your wife, as I guarantee you that she already at least suspects, but most likey knows. If your wife can’t accept what you do, then you need a new wife, as using aas and the choice to do so goes right down to the soul and moral compass of an individual. If she cannot see things the way you do then eventually down the road the ‘differences in views’ will ruin your marriage, as it will be like you are living with your mom - sneaking around all the time. - definitely doesn’t foster the big ‘T’ work (trust).[/quote]

agreed. I think I need to clear the air and make her understand if for no other reason than to eliminate the sneaking around. I don’t plan on getting a new wife any time soon/ever so I will need to make sure she is on board.

[quote]FuriousGeorge wrote:
Prisoner wrote:
Furious George: You have to come clean with your wife, as I guarantee you that she already at least suspects, but most likey knows. If your wife can’t accept what you do, then you need a new wife, as using aas and the choice to do so goes right down to the soul and moral compass of an individual. If she cannot see things the way you do then eventually down the road the ‘differences in views’ will ruin your marriage, as it will be like you are living with your mom - sneaking around all the time. - definitely doesn’t foster the big ‘T’ work (trust).

agreed. I think I need to clear the air and make her understand if for no other reason than to eliminate the sneaking around. I don’t plan on getting a new wife any time soon/ever so I will need to make sure she is on board. [/quote]

Good luck, FG. Let us know how that goes.

FG,

It’s funny, I was in the same position and decided not to tell my wife. One week into my first cycle in 10 years, she discovered my “ultimate hiding place” while she was cleaning (something she rarely does) and called me at work.

She knew I’d been researching it for quite a while and she turned out to be super cool about the whole thing. Her main issue wasn’t that I chose to do it, but that I hid it from her. It was actually a relief that she found out.

Now she helps inject me and brings me home pins from the hospital she works at.

Good luck with your decision.

So I have a question to all you fathers who have posted on here. Say when your son reaches an ideal and safe age for AAS, and you had already discussed AAS with him earlier in life and that you use them. So he obviously knows you are using them and He then becomes interrested in using them himself. If he asked you for help, would you supply him? Either with your own homebrew or another source? Or would you tell him to do it on his own? Just wondering.

[quote]waylanderxx wrote:
So I have a question to all you fathers who have posted on here. Say when your son reaches an ideal and safe age for AAS, and you had already discussed AAS with him earlier in life and that you use them. So he obviously knows you are using them and He then becomes interrested in using them himself. If he asked you for help, would you supply him? Either with your own homebrew or another source? Or would you tell him to do it on his own? Just wondering.[/quote]

I sure as hell wouldn’t supply him if he was your age. But you know that from our other discussions, right? :wink:

It would obviously depend upon his level of maturity, both mental and physical. If he was like some of the posters on this forum, who act like they are owed something that they never earned and didn’t want to listen to anything but the sound of their own voice, I wouldn’t supply him out of principle. I would do my damndest to educate him and change him, but if he was purposefully ignorant, bullheaded and arrogant, then, at least in that aspect of life, he would be lost to me. I would like to think that I would raise a better kid than that, however.

If training was obviously a way of life for him, and not a fleeting hobby, and he put in the time and study on his own, then I would probably know long before he ever asked me that he was ready, and then I would have no problem walking through the entire process together with him. Only thing I would worry about then is, if we were in America at that time, the legal implications of AAS. At that point, though, I don’t think I could be hypocritical enough to deny him anything I was bold enough to partake of, myself.

And if I were you, waylander, there is no way in hell I would tell my dad at this point. If that’s what you are wondering.

haha cortes you’re the man. In the original post I put if a kid in his 20’s asked you to help him get steroids what would you do. But seeing as every1 would probably say “thats too young” i edited haha.

And as to telling my dad. In your own words I dont want to lose my arm haha so I gotta do something about it. The swelling is getting worse by the day, its almost in my hand at this point so I gotta do what I gotta do

Well, waylander, we all will be waiting to see how it goes with your father and your doctor. Good luck, and this could be a good example for others to think about if they want to raise this issue with their children or parents.


waylanderxx,

This swelling has gone on way too long. Get your ass to a doctor before you have to get cut wide open to get as a buddy of mine did. Pic attached of what you get to look like if you wait too long.

LMAO, thanks for the share LillGuy. Great to see just after eating :slight_smile:

[quote]tico1028 wrote:
Well, waylander, we all will be waiting to see how it goes with your father and your doctor. Good luck, and this could be a good example for others to think about if they want to raise this issue with their children or parents.[/quote]

Same from me Waylander, good luck with “the talk”. Let us know what happens, I’d like to know how the discussion goes with your father, considering his background in medicine and anti-aging. I had an interesting conversation with my brother a while back about steroids and I was surprised at how ignorant he was on the subject, as he’s got a master’s degree in biochemistry.

Jelly

CONGRATS ON YOUR FIFTH CHILD! God has blessed you and your name will be carried on! It is important not to keep secrets from your children. If they catch daddy in a small, harmless white lie, they may begin questioning things you have told them. There is a good chance they would never suspect you of using AAS, depending on your moral standing with the family. (not saying AAS is wrong morally at all.) Be ready for the question. Have an educated answer that explains why daddy would do this. Explain that it can be done safely, and that it is for mature adults who have already mature and fully developed. Good luck with the fifth, wish you the best.

[quote]duhast234 wrote:
CONGRATS ON YOUR FIFTH CHILD! God has blessed you and your name will be carried on! It is important not to keep secrets from your children. If they catch daddy in a small, harmless white lie, they may begin questioning things you have told them. There is a good chance they would never suspect you of using AAS, depending on your moral standing with the family. (not saying AAS is wrong morally at all.) Be ready for the question. Have an educated answer that explains why daddy would do this. Explain that it can be done safely, and that it is for mature adults who have already mature and fully developed. Good luck with the fifth, wish you the best.[/quote]

Thanks duhast. Being a good dad is all I aspire to in this life, everything else I accomplish on top of that is just extra.

Jelly

well…I had “the talk” last night with my wife and wow did it go poorly.

It went bad for the following reasons:

  1. she had no idea I had done them (the flucuations in weight, strength, and libido were not really noticed…nor were my injections in the washroom or injection marks in my delts, quads, etc)…she broke this down to me being really good at lying and figured if I could easily decieve her about this I could possibly show up one day and tell her I had another wife/kids/family or something because I can be deceptive so easily/effectively. this was hands down the biggest issue.

  2. she really doesn’t understand steroids and has no wish to. she thinks they are wrong and gross and dangerous. I had tried to explain the reality of them before but had gotten nowhere and this was the whole reason I didn’t tell her initially. this didn’t get any better once she knew that I was taking them in the past and planned to again.

  3. she assumed that the only reason I was telling her now was that I want to do them again and figured I might get caught or want her approval because we are now married.

  4. called me selfish and said to do whatever I want because I am probably going to anyway.

Not a very good reception…

My counter to this (which took a few hours) was that the reason I told her is because I wanted to be honest about it and not lie anymore. That i am not lying about other stuff. that i really felt bad about not telling her (which is why I was now) but I knew she would react the way she did. That I had tried to talk with her about it in the past a number of times and never could because the conversation always went badly. I explained that it was to help injury repair from sports, overcome limitations of genetics that I had reached from training naturally, try to improve my overall health/appearance, and to give a boost to my libido and energy levels. I tried to explain the real benifits and dangers of steroids.

All of this sort of made things better but still they are not good. She is skeptical and really unimpressed. I am not sleeping on the couch or anything but I am not sure how this is going to play out in terms of future cycles. I was planning to do another cycle fairly soon. Not a good situation.

A warning to any and all that are going down this path. Be upfront with your girl if you plan to ever tell her…

[quote]FuriousGeorge wrote:
well…I had “the talk” last night with my wife and wow did it go poorly.

It went bad for the following reasons:

  1. she had no idea I had done them (the flucuations in weight, strength, and libido were not really noticed…nor were my injections in the washroom or injection marks in my delts, quads, etc)…she broke this down to me being really good at lying and figured if I could easily decieve her about this I could possibly show up one day and tell her I had another wife/kids/family or something because I can be deceptive so easily/effectively. this was hands down the biggest issue.

  2. she really doesn’t understand steroids and has no wish to. she thinks they are wrong and gross and dangerous. I had tried to explain the reality of them before but had gotten nowhere and this was the whole reason I didn’t tell her initially. this didn’t get any better once she knew that I was taking them in the past and planned to again.

  3. she assumed that the only reason I was telling her now was that I want to do them again and figured I might get caught or want her approval because we are now married.

  4. called me selfish and said to do whatever I want because I am probably going to anyway.

Not a very good reception…

My counter to this (which took a few hours) was that the reason I told her is because I wanted to be honest about it and not lie anymore. That i am not lying about other stuff. that i really felt bad about not telling her (which is why I was now) but I knew she would react the way she did. That I had tried to talk with her about it in the past a number of times and never could because the conversation always went badly. I explained that it was to help injury repair from sports, overcome limitations of genetics that I had reached from training naturally, try to improve my overall health/appearance, and to give a boost to my libido and energy levels. I tried to explain the real benifits and dangers of steroids.

All of this sort of made things better but still they are not good. She is skeptical and really unimpressed. I am not sleeping on the couch or anything but I am not sure how this is going to play out in terms of future cycles. I was planning to do another cycle fairly soon. Not a good situation.

A warning to any and all that are going down this path. Be upfront with your girl if you plan to ever tell her…[/quote]

      Sorry about how it went George.

This is exactly what I meant guys. Some people out there, just aren’t able to take it all in with what’s been shoved down their throats from the media and all for all these years you see. That’s why I say hey if your girl is receptive, ok cool, go for it. If you’re not sure, hey fuck it. You’re not a bad person for keeping from stressing her out over it are you? Bahhh. I’ll never cop to it to anyone but my closest friends ever. We’re a minority of people who understand the real nature of what it is we do, and face it, it’s just not gonna fly with a majority of “regular folks” both men and women.

                Good luck Furious, I hope it actually works with her coming around for you despite how it looks now. 

                  ToneBone

I don’t know if you read muscular development, some of it is shit and some not.

But in the newest issue is an article that states steroids have few if none long-term effects when used reasonably.

Just thought I’d throw it out there, when women read things out of magazines there is a certain validity to it in their minds.

It worked for me.