You're better of without her.
Make that your mantra.
She screwed you over. It happens. It likely would have happened anyhow (and will happen to the next guy). You had ten years of good times. Remember that. Plan for more.
On the lifting/fitness side: you've made some really nice, solid progress. Lost a lot of fat and gained, including on those delts which is a Good Thing[tm].
I got back in the game when a batshit crazy chick (she ended up calling the cops on me when I blew off a movie date this past weekend) basically moved in on me to grab me out of my funk. Sometimes batshit crazy is just what a guy needs. So, yeah, three years ago after I got raked over hard, she showed up.
I'm in my 40s, been lifting for 5 years (you can make a hell of a lot of progress, even in your "later years", and there's plenty of women out there. Some good, some bad, some sane (though I've yet to see one), a bunch who're crazy. Go out there, play safe, but don't be afraid of picking up a few more bruises either (just don't go seeking 'em out, unless that's your kink).
Online: yeah, there's chicks out there, and some sites are better than others. I find the whole "well, we know what we're here for" mode of it a bit off-putting, prefer real life myself, though I'm willing to try either way. Keep all your channels open, and realize you'll never know when love walks in (and it can be at the worst damn time, but still, that's OK too).