Going back to the mid-late 90’s, there was a guy some of us gym regulars called “Wrist Strap”, because that was what he smelled like. Anyone who has had a pair they’ve sweated in and kept in their trunk for a few months knows the smell I am talking about; not overpowering or gagging, just… musty I guess?
Picture a 6’ leathery guy in his mid-40’s who sounds like Lenny from “Of Mice and Men”, and apply the following:
Once, I went into the locker room and had to run out because my eyes started burning from the overpowering stench of peppermint. Wrist Strap emerged a few minutes later and said that he used peppermint oil to shower with because it kills the eggs that some kind of microscopic bugs lay in human skin.
Another time, completely out of nowhere and unsolicited, Wrist Strap walked up to me and told me that he had gone to his sister’s house last week and had spaghetti with marinara sauce, and that he was sick for three days afterward from the sauce. “Yeah, that stuff’ll tear you up,” he said with the crazy eyes “it’s fuckin’ poison, man!”. I just nodded, wondering why the hell he thought I wanted to hear this in the first place.
Any friend of mine from that era can, at any time, get an invitation from me to come over and have some spaghetti topped with “[b]fuckin’ poison, man![/b]”
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
I’m so glad I have a home gym now. What I recall is the girl who had active ringworm and another one who had obvious conjunctivits touching all the equipment.[/quote]
Well, thanks for that. Now I’ll have to add a can of lysol to my gym bag.
I once trained at a gym where there was guy who would sweat worse than Paul Newman in ‘Cool Hand Luck’ and of course never used a towel.So he would leave his dripping mark every where. Then on his last couple of reps of every set he screams at the top of his lungs. He wasn’t exactly lifting major poundage either. Weird and yet annoying.
There was another gym where a personal trainer would speak some kind of jibberish when his client would do his set. My training partner and I would comment that it sounded just like Jabba The Hut’s assistant from ‘Return of The Jedi’…de wanga wanga…jabba no botha. I swear it was dead on.
[quote]Go-Rilla wrote:
chinadoll wrote:
I’m so glad I have a home gym now. What I recall is the girl who had active ringworm and another one who had obvious conjunctivits touching all the equipment.
Well, thanks for that. Now I’ll have to add a can of lysol to my gym bag.
Mine is outside the gym…but related.
There was a new gym that just opened next to one of my favorite bike shops.
One day I was in the bike shop talking with a worker, and this guy came in wearing a shirt with a swastika on it. He asked about a bicycle to donate for a contest at the new gym. Seems he was the gym manager or owner.
Sort of changed my mind about wanting to join that gym.
Theres a 6’ 3" tall guy at our gym who alot of us have dubbed “stan” who comes in every other day to benchpress. He runs through flat, inclined, and declined with 2 plates on each side… here it comes.
He brings the weight down only 2 inches at most, with back arched farther than the mcdonalds sign, and then yells at a very high pitch while putting the weight back up.
He brags about his manuever, saying that its a complete workout, utilizing his legs, chest, back, and arms… The guy has seriously lost mass since he’s been coming to the gym. Its quite hilarious.
[quote]BH6 wrote:
T-Nick wrote:
Honestly, with all my squatting, deadlifting and jumping rope I bet everyone at the gym thinks Im the strange one
I’m with you on this one. On some other forum thread, some guy is writing about me, “There is this dude who always wears chuck taylor shoes like he is trying to be retro or something and all he does is take up space in the curling rack by doing power cleans and snatches like he is in the olympics or something. What a douche. He doesn’t even squat right, he holds the bar in front of him. I’ve never seen him curl, someone should teach him how to workout.” [/quote]
Do you use a WSC? It sorta sounds like it except I just joined and the one I go to doesn’t even have a proper squat rack.
Nothing too wacky in my current gym, although I did once have a guy ask me for a spot on the decline bench press and get upset at me because I didn’t assist him on the eccentric portion of the movement.
There is an old asian guy that works out at my gym in the mornings. He always wears sweats and a tank top, yet has the saggiest skin you will ever see. He will grab dumbbells and move them in a circular motion, clicking them in the middle, so all you hear for 20 minutes is CLICK, CLICK, CLICK.
Between sets, he will swing his arms wildly back and forth (picture a referee signaling “no good” on a pass attempt). He does the arm swinging after doing 1/16 dips on the assisted dip machine as well.
We have a guy that constantly shouts at the top of his lungs while he is on the elliptical… You can Dooooo IT!.. you got it…keep going…push, push, push… your the man…oh yeah, that’s good!..keep going! I can’t believe how many phrases he has. This goes on for 45 min.
We have another guy who likes to position himself JUST RIGHT in the hot tub on one of the jets… I will never use the hot tub.
Ok heres my share:
Got the screaming one,the barking one, got a couple of chefs from nearby restaurants that smell of onions, the make up girl, stretches john who does like 10 mins horrible stretches before work out with the girls dbs.
But this one will be the winner at any contest:
Big lad 6’6, 230-240 lbs wearing sunglasses,skirt,pink high heels a scarf and a teddy bear, I swear this is true!!!
We have a guy that thinks he’s a pirate. He has a plaited goatee, always wears a bright, multi coloured bandana, wears the tightest jeans you’ve ever seen and carries a briefcase everywhere he goes.
Inside the briefcase is a small plastic sword that he brings out whenever he signs in at reception and he gets the staff to call him ‘captain’.
His entire workout consists of walking over to the chinning bar and pumping out a set of 5 reps before picking up his briefcase and walking off into the sunset…
[quote]Gregatron wrote:
We have a guy that thinks he’s a pirate. He has a plaited goatee, always wears a bright, multi coloured bandana, wears the tightest jeans you’ve ever seen and carries a briefcase everywhere he goes.
Inside the briefcase is a small plastic sword that he brings out whenever he signs in at reception and he gets the staff to call him ‘captain’.
His entire workout consists of walking over to the chinning bar and pumping out a set of 5 reps before picking up his briefcase and walking off into the sunset…
[/quote]
[quote]Sonny S wrote:
Anyone have the old guy who walks around the locker room and sauna area naked, who reads the paper on a bench naked, and in general hangs around more than he should naked?
I don’t think he’s gay, he just doesn’t care anymore and isn’t in a rush to go anywhere.[/quote]
Holy crap! You must go to the YMCA. Every time I go there, there are always about 3 or 4 old fat guys hanging out in the locker room buck nekid watching the TV or reading a paper or just talking. One time I walked in there and the fattest guy (and I mean hugely fat) was leaning over onto a massage bench, proped up on his elbows reading a paper. Not a stich of clothing, not even a towel. Just his big disgusting wrinkly old ass pointed right at me like it’s cool. You never see guys younger than about 40 haging out nekid.
At my gym I’m pretty sure it’s me. Let me count the ways:
a woman in the free weight section
a. squatting
b. olympic lifting
c. doing Turkish get-ups.
d. lifting with hooks
using the rower
watching Battlestar Galactica on the treadmill Friday nights (actually, I’m not sure anyone has noticed that, but I know it’s weird)
actually swimming in the endless pool
not using the biometric check-in, and, even worse, explaining my opinion that we too readily trade our personal information for a little convenience to the front desk staff who honestly don’t care
being way too excited at the rumor that they may be carrying Biotest products in the near future
hell, knowing what Biotest is and what products they make.
Taken together, I think these probably earn me the title of strangest person in my gym. And that’s not even taking into account that I’m there sometimes twice a day and at hours when most of the rest of the city is at work.
oh, I forgot:
Working out with another woman. For some reason many men seem to have workout partners, but none of the other women.
There’s an old man at my gym who wears white t-shirts that he’s written political slogans on who interrupts people as they workout spitting political nonsense and making mildly racist comments. He’ll also talk to himself loudly and will laugh sporadically throughout his workout.
About a year ago there was a pretty big [not overly muscular, just an overall big] guy who was standing in front of the dumbell rack. As I walked in front of him I said “excuse me” and he said something under his breath. I turned around and asked “Did you say something?” and he gets in my face telling me that this is his gym and I’m not to look at him when he works out. I tell him I’m a grown ass man and he needs to conduct himself a little more professionally in public settings. He talks a little more shit, walks away, and then satnds in the center of the gym STARING at me for the next 5 or so minutes. I was fully expecting to have to fight him in the parking lot, but I haven’t seen him since.
[quote]PGJ wrote:
Sonny S wrote:
Anyone have the old guy who walks around the locker room and sauna area naked, who reads the paper on a bench naked, and in general hangs around more than he should naked?
I don’t think he’s gay, he just doesn’t care anymore and isn’t in a rush to go anywhere.
Holy crap! You must go to the YMCA. Every time I go there, there are always about 3 or 4 old fat guys hanging out in the locker room buck nekid watching the TV or reading a paper or just talking. One time I walked in there and the fattest guy (and I mean hugely fat) was leaning over onto a massage bench, proped up on his elbows reading a paper. Not a stich of clothing, not even a towel. Just his big disgusting wrinkly old ass pointed right at me like it’s cool. You never see guys younger than about 40 haging out nekid.
[/quote]
No shit. How about the guys blow drying their short and curlys? I have watched guys even walk over to the lounge section of the locker room and sit down naked. We even have one jackass who goes through this whole ritual of laying out towels on the floor and standing on them buck naked facing outwards to the main aisle rubbing lotion all over himself. One of these days I am going to slap the lotion out of his hand and stuff him in a locker.