T Nation

Stag Party Success!


#1

I wanted to tell everyone I am alive and well after my stag party this weekend. We started the day off with a 9 hole golf tourney. We played in 8 somes and the pro followed our 8 some around for most of the day. After the 2nd hole we had to call into the clubhouse and have them bring us 2 more 18 packs. I knew it was going to be a good day.

We didn't shotgun start and we were the last group out because obviously we were setting everything up. So we are on the tee of the 7th hole and the first group had just gotten done and came down to follow us around and watch and drink with us. They let us know that the group behind them was 5 under with 1 to play, and it is pretty much a birdie hole. So we are 5 under with 3 to play and know we will need to get to 7 under to win the thing. AND the hardest hole on that side is the 8th hole (really 17th hole) It's a 205 yard par 3 that was into a stiff wind.

Also the green is shaped where you are hitting into the shallow part of the green and it is wide left to right, also the hole is downhill but the green is elevated protected by bunkers and hills. So it's really not a birdie hole. We hit our drive up on 7, and then all miss the green on our second shot. Our chip was about 20 Ft and I went last, hit the pin on it and it spat it out to the lip. Dissapointment.

On the 8th, one of my buddies hits a nice shot onto the green but it's 25-30 ft to the pin, still, having a birdie putt is big at this point. I put last, and absolutely drain it. Dead center I started walking it in with 10 ft left to roll. Everyone cheers and i'm all pumped up. Now it's confirmed to us that the other team did finish at 6 under.

We tee off on the last hole which happens to be the longest drive hole. My buddy passes the LD marker by about 6 yeards. Then the pro who is just playing around with us puts it 10 yards past him, and he is a small guy. LOL So me and my friend both stick some nice approach shots, one is 15 Ft and the other is 16 ft on either side of the hole. Our first two guys putt, nothing too good, but our par is a tap in. Again, I get over the ball, look down the line and just absolutely pour it into the center of the cup.

So we won the tourney, the only skin, which was won on the 7th hole birdie, and my partner made the long drive. I couldn't have even scripted a better start6 to a stag party if I had wanted to. And by 10 I was still walking around. Actually at 3:00 I started walking home from a friends house, and some random kid who I never even met followed me cause he didn't want me to end up in a ditch.

Well luckily he had his phone because halfway home I saw a house that looked like it probably had a comfortable couch inside so I jumped thier fence and proceeded to try to sneak into the house. When my other friend pulled up he told me I was banging on the door yelling to let me in so I can lay on thier couch. When he told me to stop and get in the car, I told him to be quiet cause I am trying to sneak into this house.

Anyways, I didn't puke and I didn't turn down any shots, I actually don't know if I was offered any, I just kept walking up to the bar and taking shots off the bar. Probably not the best thing to do but I think people understood.

Ok well that was what I mostly remember and I'm alive and well. Next weekend the wedding and i'm sure more nice stories.

V


#2

out of all the things you could ask that's what you chose to go with huh ... way to be that guy ... douchebag

Glad you're still alive Veg ... Congrats on a successful Stag Party ... glad you didn't add to your arrest record (however close you may have come)


#3

You 2009ers are relentless in your pursuit of pissing people off. Well, i'm not going to be pissed at you because thats just you want. So no my butt doesn't hurt. Thanks for your concern. I can only assume that you must have had a sore butt after your stag party and thought it was a common occurance after all stag parties. Sorry to inform you that not everyone is as gay as you are, now will you leave my harmless little thread alone here.

V


#4

BURRRRRNNNNN!!!!!


#5

This post was flagged by the community and is temporarily hidden.


#6

uh, pics or it didn't happen..?


#7

Best stag party I went to was held at a brewery. The beer was just free flowing!

We had two extremely hot girls show up that brought out the toys and literally went to town on each other for an hour. Damn! One of them was even a squirter, which was amazing. It was better than watching a movie as we were seeing it live!

Afterwards they took the groom into a private room for some oral action (free of charge) and then anyone that wanted any "favors" were next in line (at a reasonable fee).

Afterwards, we all headed into town and pub crawled.

When the groom passed out, we stripped him down to his boxers and handcuffed him to a light post downtown in the "hotel and tourist district" and left him there for an hour.

Another one we made arrangements with the groom's wife to be that we would kidnap him. We grabbed him off the street and threw him into a party van (one of those 12 seaters) and drove across the US border. We kept telling him we were going to take him down to Tijuana as we could only afford some cheap and DIRTY sex for him.

I swear, we kept this up for a good two hours and he was almost sick to his stomach with fear of what we were going to do.

In the end that one sucked as he and his brother told their girlfriends what happened on the stag, so the rest of us got in $hit with our wives/girlfriends. I just don't know what's with having to tell your woman what happens on a stag; that's like breaking an unwritten code that has gone on for years.


#8

It was innocuous, but you are 2009 Scum and you are to be hazed like any rookie. If we don't give you shit, we probably aren't worth joining. Either that or we are cranky bitches and you are cooler than us so we are sore about that. I'll let you pick which one you think is true.

Also if you say Lighten the fuck up, it makes it sound like YOU are taking shit seriously now. So....

YOU LIGHTEN THE MOTHERFUCKING FUCK UP!

LOL

V