T Nation

Squirrel Confessions

Squirrel confessions

  1. I bury way, way too many nuts. I mean loads of them. There really is just something fucked-up about how many nuts I bury. And then I can’t even remember where most of them are.

  2. I don’t even really like nuts.

  3. I worry my tail isn’t bushy enough. Sure it’s bushy, but I look at some of the other squirrels, and their tails look so much bushier than mine, and it just makes me sad, you know?

  4. Sometimes I eat my own offspring.

  5. I fantasize about having another boy-squirrel pound my little furry ass really, really hard.

  6. Often when I’m being chased by a dog, I think I’d like to just stop and let it eat me.

  7. I’m scared of heights.

  8. I hate the way everyone thinks my twitchy nose is cute. Fuck you, I have allergies!

  9. I try to be a decent, tolerant squirrel but I can’t stop thinking that there are too many grey squirrels coming over here and taking trees and nuts from us honest, hard-working red squirrels.

  10. Some days I just wish I was a chipmunk instead.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/wdc/76478516.html

Calm down buddy it will be OK. one day, soon, a redneck hungry for squirrel nuts will put you out of your misery.

Ahh shit - you think you squirrels have got it bad?

[quote]E.Ermine wrote:
Ahh shit - you think you squirrels have got it bad?[/quote]

LMAO…you still hiding away in MsM’s walls? Dude, it’s time to move out before you get blasted with a pellet gun.

[quote]Mousse wrote:
E.Ermine wrote:
Ahh shit - you think you squirrels have got it bad?

LMAO…you still hiding away in MsM’s walls? Dude, it’s time to move out before you get blasted with a pellet gun.[/quote]

Cute guys. lol Real cute.