DO NOT call the cops.on your own son. I feel that the way you wprded your post is alarmist and unwise, and bordering o. irresponsible. YES, I agree that he needs to fill his.role as father at all costs, and NO steroids and anti depressents dont particularly mix very well--HOWEVER your post makes it sound as if he is in immediate mortal peril and that is not the case in any sense, nor is it going to help a layperson and concerned father think through things in a reasonable and rational state of mind. It encourages overreaction.
To the father--this is hard. really hard, and you are obviously a lovi.g father that a kid should feel proud to have. He is 19 and a teen, with all that comes with it. However it speaks worlds to the relationship you guys have that he would not attempt to hide his decision--or even thst he would talk to you before going into finalizing his.decision.
apologies this is on my phone keypad btw. typos plague me on my phone pad!
What is fueling this is typical 19 yesr old dreams +bullet proof mindset + impatience, along with not a little bit of typiczl teen rebellion because his dad doesnt approve and he is a teen. As perverse as this would sound, calli.g the cops.to search or searching his apartment/home yourself is the last thing you should do. It will break the trust he has with you--backhanded it may be here, but it still represents a trust from somebpdy trying tofind their new adulthood and independence. Do anything else, but not those two things.
I agree you may think about cutting him.off and other solutions like that, because after all he is not completely independent and self sufficient yet, and therefore you are still the guiding and authoritative hand in some ways, and should be true to your role as a father. On the other hand if he is living on his own--with your monetary support or not--he is still needing a good amount of independence as he assumes his role as an adult on his own in this world.
You need to bear that in mind as well (I am NOT telling you not to do anything, merely saying he is reaching into his own in some ways and needs that trust with you, no matter how much he may whine or yell amd shout and disagree as they often do :). Breaking that trust by searching his new home would seriously impair your ability to guide him in the future because he won't ever confide again, at least not for a long time, even if cops are not involved)'
Regarding the cussing--don't worry about that. seriously. from your reaction it sohnds as if he is a pretty good kid that you don't hear say things like that....but that doesnt mean he didn't say them among his friends all the time before the cycle started, ok? I did/do have a much more blue collar tongue o. the internet or with friends than with my parents and I am much older than him and with my own career.
what the cussing is is 19 year old enthusiasm--and, perversely, he wants you to share it with him at the same time.he is probably doi.g it to establish the fact that he is doing somethi.g "whether you like it or not because he is his own man now"...at least subconsciously sort of trying to be on his own. hopefully that psychobabble made sense.
The danger of being on steroids, when healthy and without SSRI meds, is not overwhelming. Risky, yes. But the human body can rebound and heal from remarkable twistings of chemistry even as young as he is. I messed with prohormones (they were legal then) when I was about his age.I turned out fine physically, and the body can fix itself however dumb we may be.. with SSRI meds there is more danger, but not where you think it lies.
The problem lies not with the testosterone he is using. It is not the cause of all these tragedies, media alarmism aside. The problem lies with the fluctuations in the levels of estrogen in his body. Control for those and moodiness largely disappears
The reason people get into dznger is two fold--1st, when stopping a cycle you experience very high spikes of estrogen relative to the test in your boy (next to zero because you stopped injecting and thd body hasn't started its own production back up yet). It is importznt to note thzt this is AFTER he has stopped using steroids. This is where lot of the biggest depression comes from, which is the most dangerous point in general for SSRI patients. the 2nd point is during the cycle but once again NOT due to the testosterone, due to not controlling wild peaks and valleys in estrogen levels.
This point is 110% avoidable with uses of ancillaries meant to prohibit the creation of estrogen and keep its levels and fluctuations in check. 100% avoidable ok? depression and moodiness from this can be eliminated, although sadly that does not eliminate bad 19year old.behavior or stupid teenage risk taking behavior, which of course bring their own problems and potential for injury or accident as you are experiencing. I am sorry.
The good news is if he is taking arimidex or a similar anti estrogen then point 2 is pretty much eliminated. The best news.is that if you can get him to come off the cycle inside the first 2-3 weeks from beginning it he wil rebound almost instantly and pretty much painlessly. after about the 3 week margin the recovery process becomes your biggest point of concern regarding the SSRIs, depression and things.
It is a tough position to be in. I put my dad through something like it even though they were legal then, but I did tell him in advance just like your son did, and we got through it just fine because I still held that trust sith him, which searching of my room in the dorm or apartment--let alone confiscation and officers of the law would have eviscerated, probably for years with my personality.
once zgain sorry for typos and grammar. it is late znd my thumbs dont like my phone touchpad. I am not a retard, I promise