T Nation

Sh*t My Dad Says

I was just lookin at this book on Amazon and it’s one of those that you can see a little of what’s written on the inside. I laughed so hard that I cried, and you can bet your ass that that’s the only time you’ll catch me cryin! Anyhow, just figured I’d leave an excerpt here for the rest of you to enjoy

(his dad) On Talking to Strangers

“Listen up, if someone is being nice to you, and you don’t know them, run away. No one is nice to you just to be nice to you, and if they are, well, they can go take their pleasant ass somewhere else.”

Im pretty sure you can read em all on twitter or facebook or something. It is pretty funny though.

Here it is!


real men cry all the time btw.

[quote]Eli B wrote:
real men cry all the time btw.[/quote]

but only from the penis.

^do you mean like a leaking penis? You really should go get that checked out dood, you might have the clap like these guys:

Growing up, my siblings and I were constantly subjected to my Dad’s words of “wisdom”. A couple of years ago I compiled dozens of them, designed a layout and had a single book published… and gave it to him as a gift.
He fucking loved it and shows it off.

Some of that wisdom:

“You can’t polish a turd.”

“A stiff dick has no conscience.”

“Nobody likes a wise-ass.”

“When you’re in shape, you even look good in a burlap bag.”

I thought that Shit My Dad Says stuff sucked. It’s basically simple sayings we’ve all heard before with ‘shit, damn’ and ‘ass’ thrown in and the occasional ‘fuck’…retards thought it was funny because it originated on teh interwebz and had a pic of the guys alleged dad…and basically retards thought it was funny that this old dude would say this shit…

I thought this Shite My Dad Says stuff sucked even more than Things White People Do, or whatever that other gay fucking thing supposedly pointing out the stereotypes of white people was called.

My son brought the book home for me awhile ago and it is pure gold lol.

The one where he say’s to his son " do I look like someone who has a fuckin’ master plan to you? was one I laid on him last year and he remembered it so we got a good laugh out of that one.

The guy who wrote the book also has a website called Holytaco.com, very funny stuff.

There’s a TV show coming out based on this, starring William Shatner

My father said that the Jews try to make us gay with the sitcoms they run. It is probably the only thing he and I agree on