Brother, I’m not going to preach at you anymore. You’ve heard me say the same shit so many times that I feel like I sound like a parrot to you.
The only thing I will say is this…I think you have a really misguided understanding of the term “stabilize” lol.
Sorry to hear you say that man. I’ve been married to the same woman for 24 years and I can completely understand that statement. The difference is, a few years ago, that little bit of being comfortable and complacent, (along with struggling with low T even though I didn’t know it yet) almost cost me that marriage. Not going into details but I will say this…we hung in there and made some changes. That feeling you are referring to has came back and came back stronger than I ever realized that it could be. My wife and I are best friends now man and we both feel like teenagers again (emotionally speaking).
It’s very easy to get comfortable when you’ve been with someone for that long, but that’s a dangerous place. Not trying to give you relationship advice here bro, but just telling you from experience that a long term marriage doesn’t have to be so so. It can be fucking awesome! What’s the key?
Don’t ever do it! Never leave ANYTHING unsaid and even a white lie, even if it’s to spare someone’s feelings, is just that…a lie. Every untruth in a relationship puts another brick in the wall. Once we figured this out, the walls came down and we learned what a marriage was supposed to be like.
Just to add, I’m not picking on you @sa22c , I’m just using your example. If you decide later on that this bird is the one, you might want to re read that last paragraph.