T Nation

Rise Of The Slaya 2019 - Strongman Edition

conditioning
strength

#3673

My dad’s a pretty bad alcoholic. As in, gets very agressive and angry when he gets drunk, not goofy and stupid. He grew up on a reservation (Native American), and at least in our part of the USA, reservations really suck, haha. Very poor, very few jobs, crappy schools and hospitals, lots of crime, lots of drugs, and not enough people making anything of themselves to give new generations examples of what they can become.

He grew up around some pretty crazy stuff. Lost his dad around age 6-8, his stepdad was physically abusive to him and his mom, his mom abandoned him and moved a couple hours away when he was 12, he basically dropped out of school at that age, was homeless, and began drinking and doings drugs daily. He reunited with his mom, two younger half sisters, and stepdad around age 15, went back to school, met my mom, they got pregnant with me at ages 16 & 17, had me at 17 & 18, was working full time while finishing high school, almost didn’t graduate due to a racist gym teacher failing him (my mom’s mom, a teacher in the high school, was able to help resolve the issue), and has since worked a very tough job where his body has been very beaten down, and he deals with some pretty crappy people daily. Like verbally abusive and extremely racist coworkers/bosses. He really enjoys the work, but hates the company. It’s his best option with a wife, 5 kids, and no college degree though, so he’s been there for 15+ years. He lost his mom a few years ago, his two sisters are both now meth addicts, him and my mom seperated last year, he’s got a few assault charges, 1 or 2 DUI’s, and has depression and anger issues. I’m his oldest child and we have had a very strained relationship most of my life, which I know bears heavily on him.

Anywhoooo, that’s my dad’s biography, haha. I mentioned a few assualt charges. He’s luckily never had to go to prison, but he’s spent a few nights in jail. He’s pretty tough. I’ve seen him pick up a guy with 4 inches of height and 50 pounds of muscle on him by the belt buckle and shirt collar and throw him across the hood of a car. I’ve seen him take on 3 guys at once and win. I guess in high school he and another kid from school had a scheduled fight. I don’t know why. A bunch of people showed up to watch. The other guy brought a wooden baseball bat, and cracked my dad across the head with it. My dad spun around and dropped to the ground, out cold. Apparently within 10 seconds he was back up, and after breaking the bat over his knee, broke the other guy’s arm quite badly. He’s not trained in martial arts or boxing, he just hits hard, can handle getting hit, and has enough anger and toughness that he doesn’t go down very easily.

He’s very intimidating, if you don’t know him. I had a bit of a rivalry this past summer with a guy who started chatting up my girlfriend, and after speaking with him and ending it, I heard the guy said I was scary. My buddy said it was true. I asked why, and he said I’m not very physically imposing - average height, average weight, but I can give some mean looks and people just know when I’m pissed at them. I get very short with them and make it well known if I’m mad. I spoke to my mom about it and she said I’m very much like my dad in that sense. He’s like 5’11", 200lbs or so, but can be fucking scary to deal with it you’re not familiar with his good, fun, happy side.

Anyway, Duke, my point is this: my dad isn’t a happy guy. He’s tough, he’s hurt people, he can fight better than most untrained people, he can get revenge, he can give the world a big middle finger and not be hurt by anything, but…he’s not happy. It’s not worth it. Deep down, he’s just the scared little kid who’s dad died and who’s mom went of the deep end due to her sadness and abandoned him. He’s the scared little kid who watched his uncle who helped raise him get stabbed in front of him, and who watched the adults strung out on meth and crack fight in front of him. Who wasn’t shown the love he should’ve been shown as a child, and now struggles to show it to others. He doesn’t lead a happy life, and he’s not happy with himself.

Don’t be that guy Duke. You’ve got a lot of very wise men giving you advice here. I’ve seen bullying going on, but never been on the giving or receiving end of it, but in 10 years, hell, even 2 years, it won’t seem worth it. Violence/revenge might seem fun, and as young dudes, we tend to even romanticize it, but it’s not the right answer. Life is tough, and sometimes just honestly sucks, but being angry at the world for it won’t solve anything. It won’t make you any happier, or a better man. Listen to the advice you’ve been given.

My apologies to everyone for the long post, I just thought I’d share the story.


#3674

You really should get some help with this Duke.
This is the worst excuse to get into a fight and say I don’t know what happend, I got a blackout.
That is what will get you to prison one day if you don’t learn to control it.
But I think and hope you’re beginning to mature and think about it.


#3675

I experienced something like the described blackout and it was while I beat someone up. That was done in self defense after that guy jumped me from behind. That is the only time that violence should be an option.
I took it maybe a little too far when I got the upper hand and I was kind of glad that I was stopped and told that he had enough . However I absolutely don’t like that memory of applying violance. Even though he “deserved a beating”.
I would never hurt someone if I saw another option.

Packing weapons and embracing the thought of hurting people, even enjoying it is something very different and something very dark.

We like you Duke and I think that in some regards you are quite mature. So I hope that you realize that this is a serious problem. One that needs professional attention. You would seek out help from your doctor, if you had an injury or a serious disease like cancer, wouldn’t you? If you would do that for such a problem, why not for something that is happening on a mental level?
Maybe that comparison helps you. It helped me to realize that therapy is the way to go to keep me from dying. And it fucking did. For a very different problem nonetheless but I value the effect of psychotherapy aswell as medication (which I have been on for about 4 years) very highly.

I’d highly advise that you seek help for your anger issues. It seems like something that could really haunt you if left to itself.

Lastly, I know you are 16 but consider this: Who do you want to be in the future? How should people see you? What kind of person would you like to be conceived as? Take a moment for this.

Don’t hide behind this and that. Take action. Some people are dealt a hard hand but it’s always a decision If you let it define you.


#3676

There are other ways young duke without violence … there are other ways.


#3677

Yeah stuff that

Jesus dude. Your dad sounds like mine. My dads 6’4 and the scariest guy ive known. It’s like i inherited both, My mums the one who will Blackout with rage (She screamed and yelled at me my whole life) and my dad will just put you in a wheelchair.

Yeah, They seem to have leaved me alone so as long as that continues I’ll be good.

Personally i don’t care if 500 people at school hate me as long as they don’t mess around. I have my mates and alot of family im close to where i am so I’m allgood.

hurting people that hurt me makes me feel better. E.g i was getting depressed over the bullying but then when i retaliated i stopped being depressed about it

I dont choose this first either. I warned them to stop and what would happen

:joy::joy::joy:


#3678

That is chosing it first. You escalated things as explained by @T3hPwnisher.

You didn’t understand this question. I wasn’t talking about right now but about the bigger picture.


#3679

#3680

Holy shit just realised im 2 months out from comp day. Time to put my Big boi socks on And really make the most of the next 8 weeks


#3681

Also 4 days till events are released!!


#3682

Inb4 sumo deadlift for max


#3683

8 weeks to learn sumo deads lol… you know me and learning lifts. Id be stuffed :rofl:


#3684

In before “axle clean pulls for max reps”


#3685

God, the irony there would make Duke’s head explode!


#3686

Oh no… :rofl::rofl:


#3687

Arm wrestling
2hrs training. They said that its gonna hurt for a few days lol… i got decimated from everyone but thats to be expected. Learning toproll to start with


#3688

Is this with a club?


#3689

Yeah man


#3690

I know what they meant when they said it’ll hurt lol… i was naive and thought because my grip gets worked frequently id be safe


#3691

Deep water intermediate day 1 week 1
3×10 Deads 100kg

10×10 SSB squats 75kg 4 minutes rest
5×10 reverse hypers 20kg

20 situps with 1 minute plank 3 rounds no rest. Didnt rest on the planks!! Was awesome.

The squats were honestly death, Definitely the hardest workout ive ever done. I just wanted to leave the gym by set 4. It was hot as fuck and the squats just felt like hell. Really happy with how my form was today too. Great session. Added 10kg to the squats and 15kg to the deads and deads were solid. Not looking forward to 10×10 push press tomorrow.


#3692

why are you adding weight?