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Ridiculous Training Advice You've Heard

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
Someone over on FA posted that one of their family members was concerned that if she kept lifting weights her uterus would fall out.

That pretty much takes the cake for me.[/quote]

That might’ve been me, talking about my mother. She’s said that more than once.

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
MarvelGirl wrote:
Someone over on FA posted that one of their family members was concerned that if she kept lifting weights her uterus would fall out.

That pretty much takes the cake for me.

That might’ve been me, talking about my mother. She’s said that more than once.[/quote]

Well then, thank you for posting it because it cracked me up.

My dad got me with one today. The men in my family are all really big, but none of them lift seriously. I was braggin to him about all the weight I’ve been throwing around and he got a bit snippy with me.

Apparently, with our genetics, we can lift almost nothing and still look awesome. So, it’s ridiculous for me to risk injury when I can just knock out a couple pushups and get good results.

I was like “Dad…that is so lazy…” and then he yelled something about working smarter not harder so I changed the subject. It was weird.

“The smith machine squat is the same as a barbell squat”

“You should ALWAYS go to failure on every set”

“You should only squat once a week”

“look up when you squat”

do not do 21 curls, because you have to lift the weight the whole rang of motion to get anything out of it

My buddy was told by his football coach back in high school, “lift slow for strength, fast for building muscle.” Fortunately he just listens to everything I say now. :slight_smile:

A lady trainer gave me some cardio advice right out of her certification handbook. Something about a “fat burning zone” and calculating the exact heart rate based on age, blood type, astrological sign, etc. She also said something about not wanting to have sex with another girl because, “I need the penis inside me.” Then she ran off to work her “bisexuals and trisexuals”. I miss her.

I find intrusive advice is far less common in college gyms than anywhere else I’ve been.

But the most common one I get is “I used to lift that at your age and my knees are shot now, you don’t need to lift that”

I say thanks and that I’ll worry about it when I’m old.

Heh Ghost it don’t change, I’m 35 and I hear it all the time still from guys older than me. The younger guys just give me the usual “I have a bad back” excuse.

what’s everyones problem with squatting once a week? or is that thinking you can ONLY squat once a week?

[quote]waldo21212 wrote:
Two fat girls were talking at the gym, and one told the other one not to work her legs because it’ll make her legs too big and bulky and there are already too big and muscular (they weren’t, they were fat),

And to make her legs look better she should not eat for a couple hours, then go run for a long time so her body would use her leg muscle for energy and her legs would get smaller and more “tone”. WTF??[/quote]

I’ve encountered this sort of logic way too many times. 90 percent of the time a girl at my gym tells me about her workout routine/training approach/whatever my head just wants to explode.

The last girl was telling me how she was told the usual “high reps for ‘toning’, low reps for building muscle”.
So I ask her: “How many reps you doing?” and she says “30”, and I ask “total?” and she goes “no, 3 sets of 30 reps”.
Mind you this was on the hip adductor machine and she wasn’t resting for more than 15 seconds between these sets and was not struggling in any way, shape or form. She’s a pretty girl, and I was probably frowning visibly at this point.
She asks, “why? is that not good?”. So I say “huh. who gave you that routine?” And she responds “my old boyfriend - he was a lacrosse player.”

We talked and I promised her that squats and weighted lunges would turn her into a “calorie burning machine” with a butt like Jessica Biel. She actually listened to me. It’s a start.

If a girl does a “male” push-up she will dislocate her womb.

This is more nutrition-wise:
“you can’t eat fat if you want to lose weight”

“you should eat only loads and loads of protein when you want to get bigger”

my favorite one: “all fat is bad for you”

“if you lift heavy weights, you’ll get muscular but you’ll shrink” <–yes I’m serious.

[quote]Stength4life wrote:
I remember the first few months I started training a man at my gym told me that the best way to gain weight was to just drink alot of water. THat makes absolutely no sense at all. Even back then I wasn’t THAT stupid. Are there any ones worse than mine?[/quote]

… and I hate it how soo many people squat differently and everyone is 100% sure that their way is the only right way. Even on websites like YouTube, everyone squats diffrently. I am aware that there are different methods for squatting but some people don’t and in their minds every other way that isn’t theirs is wrong.

Haha. I actually imagine all people who lift are actually “bigger” than the average joe. Less pubic fat means your member’s gonna be more exposed.

Of course, it’ll look smaller when you have the body of a gorilla.

[quote]the_overman wrote:
“if you lift heavy weights, you’ll get muscular but you’ll shrink” <–yes I’m serious.

Haha. I actually imagine all people who lift are actually “bigger” than the average joe. Less pubic fat means your member’s gonna be more exposed.

Of course, it’ll look smaller when you have the body of a gorilla.[/quote]

lol, I meant shrink as in decrease in height, but that’s an interesting way of looking at it. lol

I told a guy yesterday to take fish oil for his achey joints.

“Yeah? I take fish oil. How much do you take?”

Me: “8-10 grams a day. I’ve gone as high as 15 grams but I definitely notice the difference when I stop taking it.”

“10 grams? That’s like 25,000 milligrams. Way beyond the RDA.”

Me: “Where did you get 25,000 mg?”

“10 grams. That’s 25,000…”

Me: “No. Every 1 gram is 1,000 milligrams, so 10 grams is 10,000 milligrams.”

“Are you a pharmacist by trade?”

And my recent favorite:

I overheard a guy and girl talking. They had come to the gym together and were probably in their first or second year of college. Maybe. The girl is at the lat pull down station, the guy is doing cable cross overs.

Girl: “Oh my gosh! You love working your chest! How many exercises do you do for it?”

Guy: “I sometimes spend an hour on my chest, maybe two hours.”

Girls: “What about your legs?”

Guy: “I’d say in the last year I’ve maybe only worked my legs three times. I think they’re fine.”

(they were twigs, by the way)

I’ve been told that my squats were too low that I should stop before I am parallel to the floor.

While I was doing Zottman curls that I shouldn’t turn my wrist at the top, it’s was better if I stay in supination…

and the best: do abs and you’ll lose your belly…

“Protein should not make up more than 5% of your calories. 90% of your calories should be carbohydrates.”

“Meat is dangerous, and vegetarianism will save your life.”

“Running is a great way to make your legs bigger.”

THE BEST/WORST PART: All quotes from my Nutritional Science and Health professor ^_-

I have been “helped” by two different guys, perfect strangers, who walked up to me in the middle of my set and told me:

#1 “You shouldn’t be lifting that much weight. Girls don’t need muscles.”

#2 “You don’t need to do chinups. Chinups are useless. I can’t even do them.”

Fortunately, I’ve also had some really nice guys come up to me & give me great advice.

I used to work at a burrito joint in high school and I would make myself massive steak burritos during break. After about a week of doing this one of my co-workers tried to convince me that I would lose fat and build more muscle if I swapped out the steak for tofu. Hah!

the body can only absorb 30g of protein, even for an athlete
-human body prof at kstate