T Nation

Ridiculous Training Advice You've Heard

I remember the first few months I started training a man at my gym told me that the best way to gain weight was to just drink alot of water. THat makes absolutely no sense at all. Even back then I wasn’t THAT stupid. Are there any ones worse than mine?

i’ve told a few girls that ‘swollowing’ helps them to metabolize fat better and helps them to get a leaner more toned phisique… does that count?

some girl was sucking in her gut, when asked what the fuck she was doing she responded with something that ment she thought her stomach would stay that way

i had a guy trying to convince me lifting very light weights at an incredibly slow pace is the way to bigger muscles.

Someone once told me that if I keep lifting heavy weights over a long period of time with solid progression, then I’ll get bigger and stronger.

what a psycho!

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I had a Dr tell me Creatine is a steroid or was it has other pro-hormones or something like that.

I had a Dr tell me that whey protein shakes have DHEA added in for more effectiveness. And there are no safe products.

2 years of training makes you look like your on steroids.

Machines are safer and build more muscle then free weights and should be the only thing used.

500 sit-ups daily = six pack abs

Steroids shrink your dick.

You don’t have to eat big to get bigger.

Only squat once a week… I have more but I just can’t think about them.

[quote]dirtbag wrote:
Only squat once a week… I have more but I just can’t think about them.

[/quote]

Don’t squat it will hurt your back. (Thank you high school baseball coaches for setting me back a few years)

[quote]oneforship wrote:
dirtbag wrote:
Only squat once a week… I have more but I just can’t think about them.

Don’t squat it will hurt your back. (Thank you high school baseball coaches for setting me back a few years)[/quote]

Or deadlift, or really work hard at all. All weights lifted should be lite and your workouts should seem easy and effortless.

Yeah, the usual ‘squats hurt your knee’s’ and ‘deadlifting hurts your back’.

I think the main bullshit story I bought was that kettlebells are master race of dumbpells, and are superior in every way, despite being ludicrously expensive, coming in severely limited weights, and being useful pretty much only for GPP.

Every time I see a crossfitter doing overhead squats with a kettlebell, or even more hilarious, people doing flyes with them because they provide more overload at the top of the movement, a piece of me dies inside.

Another piece thinks it’s fucking hilarious though.

I was recently told that lifting screws up your metabolism. lolz.

Someone over on FA posted that one of their family members was concerned that if she kept lifting weights her uterus would fall out.

That pretty much takes the cake for me.

[quote]MarvelGirl wrote:
Someone over on FA posted that one of their family members was concerned that if she kept lifting weights her uterus would fall out.

That pretty much takes the cake for me.[/quote]

Plunk splat… "Looks at MarvelGirl

I think you left your uterus in the power rack. You can’t just leave that behind you know.

Posted at gyms everywhere

“Ladies please be sure to pick your uterus after your workout is done. Failure to do so can result in membership suspension.”

Right under it

“Please put your weights away after you use them. Failure to comply will result in membership suspension”

I don’t know if this counts but I get the " I don’t want to get big, I just want to get cut" crap all the time.

“You shouldn’t deadlift. It’s bad for your skeleton.” True story.

I had a PE teacher tell me that aerobic training burns more fat and saves more muscle than anaerobic training. I was baffled and asked him “are you sure it isn’t the other way around?” his response: “oh yea, if you plan on cutting for wrestling you need to run for longer distances instead of sprinting shorter distances, because that will save your muscle.”

[quote]dsg wrote:
I had a PE teacher tell me that aerobic training burns more fat and saves more muscle than anaerobic training. I was baffled and asked him “are you sure it isn’t the other way around?” his response: “oh yea, if you plan on cutting for wrestling you need to run for longer distances instead of sprinting shorter distances, because that will save your muscle.”[/quote]

Haha, I take it he’s never seen a marathon runner compared to a sprinter.

that the ab flex by tony little would get you abs in just 2 minutes a day and that using electro muscle stimulation machines on your abs got you cut coz bruce lee used one…lol

Two fat girls were talking at the gym, and one told the other one not to work her legs because it’ll make her legs too big and bulky and there are already too big and muscular (they weren’t, they were fat),

And to make her legs look better she should not eat for a couple hours, then go run for a long time so her body would use her leg muscle for energy and her legs would get smaller and more “tone”. WTF??

My coworker told me to try spin classes the other day. He runs a lot and thinks he is in pretty good shape. I politely told him I’d consider it.