T Nation

Respect or Disrespect, What Gives

The threads are full of them. Is it just a certain percentage per capita that have a problem with respect. It’s not an age thing, they seem to come in all ages. It’s not gender, race or wealth that I can tell.

I train my daughter at the gym, she’s seventeen and gets a kick out of watching my reactions to disrespectful people. I really don’t have any tolerance for it. She said to me once, just give them that look of yours. I had no idea what she was talking about so I asked her what look. The one that makes me behave! So I thought, if they’re going to act like kids maybe I should treat them like kids, so I do.

Now I just go about my business. If someone is using multiple stations and I need one i just move in. If they say they’re using the station I give them the look. I couldn’t believe how well it worked, they do a 180 without my saying a word.

I tried the look in the mirror I didn’t get it so I asked my daughter again. She said are you kidding, you’ve been scaring the hell out of all my life with it, that’s why I’m such an angle. I guess I need to be pissed off to get the look.

The disrespect is still there. Is it bad up bringing or are they just inconsiderate aholes. Ex school bullies still trying to get their way. Just makes me want to bitch slap them all. They’re there morning, noon and night. It’s like a plague on society, genocide anyone!

I didn’t want to see you go “post-less” so I thought I’d try and make an add.

First of all don’t go bitch slapping anybody (unless you’re trained in brazilian Jiu-Jitsu or something), especially in front of your daughter; if she witnesses you getting your ass kicked “the look” may not work as well in the future.

In all seriousness though and I said this to a friend the other day over a dispute at the poker table I had with another guy; “for some reason I find myself less and less surprised when people let me down, but every bit as disappointed as if it were the first time.” You’re doing the right thing by moving in on equipment that is not in use and if someone gets offended they deserve “the look” if you will.

I run multiple stations due to time constraints and don’t mind sharing one bit, but when some dumb fuck comes and parks on one of the pieces I’m using I do get a little irritated…could you teach me the look? Because it might be a little more pleasant for them then the day when I finally snap and say get the fuck off your ass if you’re not using that, you’re holding up the entire gym.

I usually don’t say anything here that I wouldn’t say in real life.

If you’re fucking up, I’ll tell you and you deserved to be called out on it (Same goes for praise, a little goes a long way).

My two cents.

When did it become respectful to barge in when someone else is using something? Of course the person using multiple stations should work around you or just give up the extra station, but it’s common courtesy to ask.

[quote]HoratioSandoval wrote:
When did it become respectful to barge in when someone else is using something? [/quote]It didn’t[quote]
Of course the person using multiple stations should work around you or just give up the extra station, but it’s common courtesy to ask.[/quote]

Ok, if I’m doing arms one day and rotating between db curls and push downs or bb curls and weighted dips is it ok for someone to do a set (or as many sets as they want) of dips say, if I’m not using it? Of course. Is it ok for them to sit there and lean on it and guard it with their life? Yes. If they are leaning on it and guarding it with their life should they get the fuck off if I want to jump in for a set? Yes. You get my point now?

[quote]HoratioSandoval wrote:
When did it become respectful to barge in when someone else is using something? Of course the person using multiple stations should work around you or just give up the extra station, but it’s common courtesy to ask.[/quote]

Respectful is using multiple stations, which I do, and putting things back until you’re there again. Now most people only us multiple stations when it’s not busy, and I certainly would jump in then they’re about to do a set. But then they head for there next and turn around to inform me they’re not done yet, fuck them.

I use the squat rack to do pull-ups because it has a pull-up bar. At six in the morning I will size up the gym activity to see if the racks in use, if so I ask if they mine my jumping in between sets.

Like the guy that six or more sets of dumbbells by his bench that he plans on using later, fuck him to I’ll take what I need, he’s an asshole. Everyone pays to use the gym equipment.

There is a time to be respectful and then there’s you’ve gone way to far. I respect everyone in the gym that respects everyone in the gym. There are just some people that think they own the gym and don’t give a shit about anyone else.

[quote]streamline wrote:
There are just some people that think they own the gym and don’t give a shit about anyone else.[/quote]

This is the sort of attitude you are showing us right now.

I frequently do antagonist training and find myself easily working in with other people – no mean stares involved.

Is this about posts on T-Nation or what happens in real life?

Get big and strong. When you’re squatting 800 for sets of 20 and benching 700 plus 2 blue bands doubled up for sets of 10, people tend to treat you with the utmost respect. Note: I am not that strong, not even close. People do not disrespect me though.

If all else fails, threaten to tell mommy on them.

[quote]anthropocentric wrote:
streamline wrote:
There are just some people that think they own the gym and don’t give a shit about anyone else.

This is the sort of attitude you are showing us right now.

I frequently do antagonist training and find myself easily working in with other people – no mean stares involved.[/quote]

You do have a good point. The mindset created through words here made me think exclusively of those few times where I just think to myself where do these people come from? but the reality of it is that these occurrences are few and far between.

[quote]TunaMonkey wrote:
Get big and strong. When you’re squatting 800 for sets of 20 and benching 700 plus 2 blue bands doubled up for sets of 10, people tend to treat you with the utmost respect. Note: I am not that strong, not even close. People do not disrespect me though.

If all else fails, threaten to tell mommy on them.[/quote]

Exactly, if you have to throw your weight around with people at the gym…chances are you dont have much weight to begin with. If someone is using multiple stations, dont fucking barge in and just take what you want. Are there rules posted in your gym saying “use only one station at a time”?

If you pulled that shit with me, I would physically remove you. “Give them that look”? Wow, someones got their e-nuts swinging pretty hard here. What are you doing in a gym anyways? Shouldnt you be out roller blading and doing your hardcore p90x pilates?

[quote]Stronghold wrote:
TunaMonkey wrote:
Get big and strong. When you’re squatting 800 for sets of 20 and benching 700 plus 2 blue bands doubled up for sets of 10, people tend to treat you with the utmost respect. Note: I am not that strong, not even close. People do not disrespect me though.

If all else fails, threaten to tell mommy on them.

Exactly, if you have to throw your weight around with people at the gym…chances are you dont have much weight to begin with. If someone is using multiple stations, dont fucking barge in and just take what you want. Are there rules posted in your gym saying “use only one station at a time”? If you pulled that shit with me, I would physically remove you. “Give them that look”? Wow, someones got their e-nuts swinging pretty hard here. What are you doing in a gym anyways? Shouldnt you be out roller blading and doing your hardcore p90x pilates?[/quote]

Pretty true, if people aren’t showing you respect, you aren’t big enough and strong enough. IMO, people that go to gyms are less in shape and not as strong as they were 20-30 years ago. I think this is becuase the hardcore worked out then for big and strong, now we have a ton of fitness types and wannbes.

But if I train in a commercial gym, ( I have my own gym with everything I need), I try to be very polite. I’m big and strong enough that I can politely offer assistance or advice or ask to use equipment and people amazingly automatically comply.

Why is it that when people think that they are polite, they become outraged by people who they think are rude, then vent on a message board about it?

There probably isn’t anything more idiotic than someone who who is so arrogant as to believe that they are the standard by which others should hold themselves.

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
Why is it that when people think that they are polite, they become outraged by people who they think are rude, then vent on a message board about it?

There probably isn’t anything more idiotic than someone who who is so arrogant as to believe that they are the standard by which others should hold themselves.

[/quote]

Funny you say that. I’ve been thinking about this since last night…it’s unfortunate that it is running so rampant right now all over the site.

[quote]analog_kid wrote:
Is this about posts on T-Nation or what happens in real life? [/quote]

LOL.