No one likes a quitter.
Just sayin.
I had that first kind of night freshmen year of college, where you wake up, spend the whole next morning into the afternoon sick, vomiting,…still drunk and you utter your first, “I’m never drinking again.” Except I was the one who actually kinda meant it.
I drink maybe 4 times a year now, and stick to wine, cocktails, martinis, and whatnot to make it an enjoyable experience.
I got a DUI three years ago and quit on the spot.
There are different kinds of people and they respond to alcohol differently. If the OP is “just asking,” and doesn’t really have a problem with drinking, then there should be nothing to worry about. However, typically, that type of person will not need to ask that kind of question. I am not being presumptive about you, OP, you may really be “just asking,” I’m just saying that, from very personal experience, this is usually NOT the case.
If you or anyone else reading this thread really wants to be free from the slavery of addiction to alcohol, if it has you in its grips and you are one of those people who is honest enough with himself to admit that he does not have control over it, I would be more than happy to lead you to a solution that WORKS, and it does NOT involve AA, fucking spilling your soul out in front of a bunch of strangers, or much anything other than similar principals to what you will find in how we approach exercise on this site. It completely transforms you, psychologically and physically, using supplements, pharaceuticals, and the mind to completely change the problem at its very root.
I can now admit that I used to have a MASSIVE problem with alcohol, finally on the order of close to a half a bottle of whiskey every night. I have now actually been able to eliminate any craving or desire (in the way that I used to desire it, anyway) for alcohol in any situation, including social events. However, I can still drink socially, and do. I just do not get drunk anymore, nor do I have ANY desire to get anywhere near that state, ever. I almost never drink anymore, though, not through any concrete decision not to, but just because it never occurs to me to. This changed happened pretty much literally overnight.
If anyone here is interested, I would be happy to expound upon this in this thread or via PM. You just let me know.
I think that people who do not have that little monster inside of them, that locks on and takes over their wills, despite all desires to the contrary, cannot really understand how terrible it is. What despair addicts feel. There is nothing wrong with this, indeed you should consider yourselves blessed. Those who do have this problem will understand what I mean, and how exasperated I used to feel when someone would tell me that I should just “cut down.” It doesn’t work that way for some people and willpower has NOTHING to do with it.
Like I said,if anyone is interested, please just let me know. If not, and I have been making a mistaken assumption about this entire thing, then please forgive me and I will bow out of this thread right now.
And one final word just in case anyone feels perhaps I have just completed this program and am one of those who will just backslide when the glow wears off: I kicked that monster out 2 years ago and have not one single time had an episode of drunkenness nor any desire whatsoever to achieve that state. I can’t even drink whiskey anymore.
I do like the odd beer and I love good champagne (Moet and Chandon…mmmmmm 
Cortes, I don’t really have any of the problems you described, but would still be very interested in hearing at least the basic principles behind how you overcame that addiction.
I did it 17 years ago. I had a massive day/nighter and was so hungover and ill for 2 days, I said never again am I drinking again. I have not since.
Do not miss it, although some people think your a bit socially inept. Never much of a big regular drinker , but a binge drinker.
Just takes a bit of a will to win i suppose.
[quote]Blaze_108 wrote:
Cortes, I don’t really have any of the problems you described, but would still be very interested in hearing at least the basic principles behind how you overcame that addiction.[/quote]
Sure Blaze.
A couple of people have PMed me so I will just cut and paste most of what I wrote to one member here. If this does help someone out there, please drop me a PM sometime in the future when it has worked for you and let me know that it did. I would really appreciate just hearing that someone else was set free from the slavery of addiction like I was.
Here’s what I wrote:
I’m very happy you asked. Go here and start reading:
Get the book, follow the instructions. They are very, very easy instructions. Using all of the elements of the program together is, I think, very important, though you may find that one element “does it” for you. For me, it was almost certainly the hypnotism CDs. I am very pleased to find that I appear to be quite susceptible to hypnosis, so once I added that final element, I immediately got what I was looking for. The best part is, once it “clicks,” you can start phasing out each factor until you are back to using none of it if you don’t want to.
I no longer use ANY of the supplements, the topiramate (I have an assload and if it’s difficult at all for you to secure you just let me know and I can send you some), or the hypnotism tapes.
Everything I’m saying won’t make sense to you just yet, but visit the website and read the book (you can read it in about 2 hours), and all of this will become clear.
It is a little bit expensive to get everything together all at once, but if you are drinking anything like I was, it will pay for itself in spades in just a few months.
Research everything you can and read the book and put the program to use for real and I really don’t think you will have to ask me any questions. But if you want to, you are more than welcome to at any time.
Good luck and may God bless you, brother. I really hope that this does something for you or someone you love.
[quote]Cortes wrote:
There are different kinds of people and they respond to alcohol differently. If the OP is “just asking,” and doesn’t really have a problem with drinking, then there should be nothing to worry about. However, typically, that type of person will not need to ask that kind of question. I am not being presumptive about you, OP, you may really be “just asking,” I’m just saying that, from very personal experience, this is usually NOT the case.
If you or anyone else reading this thread really wants to be free from the slavery of addiction to alcohol, if it has you in its grips and you are one of those people who is honest enough with himself to admit that he does not have control over it, I would be more than happy to lead you to a solution that WORKS, and it does NOT involve AA, fucking spilling your soul out in front of a bunch of strangers, or much anything other than similar principals to what you will find in how we approach exercise on this site. It completely transforms you, psychologically and physically, using supplements, pharaceuticals, and the mind to completely change the problem at its very root.
I can now admit that I used to have a MASSIVE problem with alcohol, finally on the order of close to a half a bottle of whiskey every night. I have now actually been able to eliminate any craving or desire (in the way that I used to desire it, anyway) for alcohol in any situation, including social events. However, I can still drink socially, and do. I just do not get drunk anymore, nor do I have ANY desire to get anywhere near that state, ever. I almost never drink anymore, though, not through any concrete decision not to, but just because it never occurs to me to. This changed happened pretty much literally overnight.
If anyone here is interested, I would be happy to expound upon this in this thread or via PM. You just let me know.
I think that people who do not have that little monster inside of them, that locks on and takes over their wills, despite all desires to the contrary, cannot really understand how terrible it is. What despair addicts feel. There is nothing wrong with this, indeed you should consider yourselves blessed. Those who do have this problem will understand what I mean, and how exasperated I used to feel when someone would tell me that I should just “cut down.” It doesn’t work that way for some people and willpower has NOTHING to do with it.
Like I said,if anyone is interested, please just let me know. If not, and I have been making a mistaken assumption about this entire thing, then please forgive me and I will bow out of this thread right now. [/quote]
I’m down to learn.
Break that shit down for us Cortez. I quit and cut down all the time, but only for days cause drinking is awesome.
I went to a bar last night for the first time in three years and didn’t drink anything, just sat there and ate bar food.
[quote]The ShiZniT wrote:
Break that shit down for us Cortez. I quit and cut down all the time, but only for days cause drinking is awesome.[/quote]
See three posts up from this one. All the information anyone should ever need starts with that mywayout link I posted.
Also, this is not intended rudely in the slightest, but I don’t think that it is drinking, per se, that is awesome, but the social lubrication that we receive from alcohol that makes our interactions with others so much fun.
Two points in support of this: First, think of someone you know who has never drunk, from birth. I think most people know at least one or two people like this, who go to parties and even the bars, but do not drink and have no interest in drinking, but who like to socialize. These people, for whatever reason, have never taught themselves or been taught that alcohol is necessary to social interaction, so they have none of the baggage, preconceived notions and biases that come with enjoying oneself as regards drinking.
Little kids have a fantastic time at a birthday party without any alcohol whatsoever. What about them and us has changed? If anything, after we mature, we should be able to have more fun than them, because we are more aware and have more experience to base our sociability upon.
Second point: We are BOMBARDED by media that tells us social interaction is vitally dependent upon a steady supply of alcohol. From magazines, to tv, to movies, to our peer groups themselves ever perpetuating the memes that alcohol is necessary for enjoyment. This is NOT TRUE. And this was actually the biggest hurdle I had at first after I was set free. The best way I can think to describe it is suddenly switching to clothes without pockets. All of a sudden I wasn’t sure what to do with my hands. This translated to awkwardness (only at first) in social situations (and I am NOT socially awkward), not because I was not having fun, but because, as an adult, I had NEVER attempted to involve myself in any kind of leisure-based social event without the false crutch of alcohol. Thing was, though, that I was genuinely NOT not having fun. I was not having fun in the way I would have had with alcohol, but at certain times, like late into the night, I was able to observe that this was not “fun,” anyway. It was just a bunch of drunks stumbling and slurring about in a drunken stupor.
This awkward feeling did not last long, though. After a few months, I pretty much figured out “what to do with my hands,” and I am now perfectly fine in any situation. I don’t even worry about not drinking as much as others, as I just keep a drink close to me and nurse it very slowly throughout the evening, or just don’t worry about it.
One more point in support of the above. If drinking was truly a vital component of the social experience, then why is it we feel that it is only necessary in certain situations? How come we are able to enjoy a lunch, or day at the pool, or game of frisbee, or just a break at work our school with our friends without feeling the need to bong a 40 of Mickey’s in order to do so? It’s because we and the media CREATE these distinctions that require alcohol for certain situations. It’s all a big lie, and most of the world has been fooled into believing it.
Okay, sorry for writing war and peace here. This is honestly the first time I’ve written about this so it is fairly interesting for me, too, so “hear myself talk,” so to speak, about my experience. I hope it is helpful or at least interesting for someone.
[quote]belligerent wrote:
I went to a bar last night for the first time in three years and didn’t drink anything, just sat there and ate bar food. [/quote]
What did you think about it?
Man, I never understood the appeal of drinking…It’s like EVERYONE does it, so why would I want to be just like everyone else? That burning taste, feeling dehydrated, the chance of puking, being incoherent, loud, stumbly, and waking up hungover (in no shape to workout)…how is this appealing?..It is a poison you know
What I really don’t understand are those who sit and watch baseball(or whatever sport) and drink beer in the middle of the day, like, lets sit here and determine the worst possible way to spend our time. The main point is how do you drink in the middle of the day?
For probably the first time EVER I drank like 2-3 beers with two friends and sat in their apt. (instead of going out, which is usually the ONLY reason I will drink) for about 4 hrs and chatted…what a waste(wish we were high instead for a more interesting convo, but no one had any), I’ll never do that again. I really Could NOT* care less if I never drank again.
BUT…
Like a few around here, I LOVE to smoke weed instead (I’m a musician and it has helped me IMENSLY). Theres actually A value to smoking (increases aplha brainwaves for creative purposes) and it doesn’t debilitate you quite like drinking does…problem is that I realized this and have been able to get away with smoking nearly every day for the past 5-6 years with the exception of a few breaks (weeks/months). Without it I feel like such a SQUARE and with it I feel a lot cooler.
To clarify things for the handful of people who made the assumption that since I asked in this manner I’m abusing alcohol:
I don’t believe I have an addiction to alcohol; I’m not a regular or habitual drinker. I actually don’t drink very often, and even less frequent since I started working the door at a club on the weekends. I do tend to be a binge drinker though. I have always struggled with controlling my alcohol intake when I go out with the intent of having any more than 1 or 2.
If I know I’m going to be driving, I’ll cut myself off after one or two drinks or just have water, and I’ll be fine. But if I’m going out to party and have a good time, it seems that alcohol begets alcohol and I will lose control, get blottoed and do something stupid. And I’m the kind of person who’ll black out when he gets really hammered (I generally stick to hard liquor and that seems to be the effect it has on me), so not only do I do stupid things, I have to hear about them from friends.
Actually the night before I started this topic (yes I was hungover when I started this) I inexplicably turned down a cab my friends were offering to pay for to spend 2.5-3 hours walking home while it was snowing.
To put it plainly, I don’t want to do this anymore, and I’m considering just quitting drinking altogether as a means to this end. I don’t like me when I’m wasted. I don’t like waking up the next morning feeling like shit and knowing that feeling isn’t going away all day. I don’t like having to hear about the stupid stunts I pulled or things I said when I don’t remember them happening. I don’t like knowing that I’ve nullified hours of hard work in the gym every time I get blackout wasted.
I’m still young (23) but I’ve had enough of this shit. I’m trying not to make a knee-jerk decision about this, and actually spend some time when I’m not hung over seriously considering what I should be doing and if this is the right course of action. But as it stands right now, having read this thread and had another day to think about it, I think I’m going to be taking a long hiatus from the alcohol (start with a year and go from there).
I won’t be implementing this right away. One of my best friends is getting married in a little over a month and the intent would be to have my last drink at his wedding. This would give me some more time to think about this decision, and give me one more night to see if I can keep myself under some sort of control (at the bachelor party - I know, control is unlikely at this thing, but success would very much be relative).
I’ve already got weightlifting nationals the week after he gets married so I’ll only be having a couple on his wedding night anyways, but again, this is one of my best friends and I’m in the wedding party, so if I do wind up embracing sobriety long-term, it seems to me that having my last two drinking occasions be his bachelor party and wedding night is about as good an option as any other.
Anyways, that’s where I stand. Thanks for the replies everyone, been interesting reading everybody’s story.
[quote]debraD wrote:
In other words, I got old ;)[/quote]
LoL! Indeed =P
At college I was much the same but these days drink nothing but water, milk and the proteins.
And feel ALOT better for it!
[quote]carbiduis wrote:
Man, I never understood the appeal of drinking…It’s like EVERYONE does it, so why would I want to be just like everyone else? That burning taste, feeling dehydrated, the chance of puking, being incoherent, loud, stumbly, and waking up hungover (in no shape to workout)…how is this appealing?..It is a poison you know
What I really don’t understand are those who sit and watch baseball(or whatever sport) and drink beer in the middle of the day, like, lets sit here and determine the worst possible way to spend our time. The main point is how do you drink in the middle of the day?
For probably the first time EVER I drank like 2-3 beers with two friends and sat in their apt. (instead of going out, which is usually the ONLY reason I will drink) for about 4 hrs and chatted…what a waste(wish we were high instead for a more interesting convo, but no one had any), I’ll never do that again. I really Could NOT* care less if I never drank again.
BUT…
Like a few around here, I LOVE to smoke weed instead (I’m a musician and it has helped me IMENSLY). Theres actually A value to smoking (increases aplha brainwaves for creative purposes) and it doesn’t debilitate you quite like drinking does…problem is that I realized this and have been able to get away with smoking nearly every day for the past 5-6 years with the exception of a few breaks (weeks/months). Without it I feel like such a SQUARE and with it I feel a lot cooler.[/quote]
You should try to understand that drinking is really not a pain after you’ve tried it more than the handful of times that you apparently have.
Like people that try one cigarette and act befuddled at how a person could become addicted to it…try a few more and you get that whole “Uh oh…I never thought it would happen to me!!” thing.
You say you smoke weed every day?
[quote]TheJonty wrote:
To clarify things for the handful of people who made the assumption that since I asked in this manner I’m abusing alcohol:
I don’t believe I have an addiction to alcohol; I’m not a regular or habitual drinker. I actually don’t drink very often, and even less frequent since I started working the door at a club on the weekends. I do tend to be a binge drinker though. I have always struggled with controlling my alcohol intake when I go out with the intent of having any more than 1 or 2. If I know I’m going to be driving, I’ll cut myself off after one or two drinks or just have water, and I’ll be fine. But if I’m going out to party and have a good time, it seems that alcohol begets alcohol and I will lose control, get blottoed and do something stupid. And I’m the kind of person who’ll black out when he gets really hammered (I generally stick to hard liquor and that seems to be the effect it has on me), so not only do I do stupid things, I have to hear about them from friends. Actually the night before I started this topic (yes I was hungover when I started this) I inexplicably turned down a cab my friends were offering to pay for to spend 2.5-3 hours walking home while it was snowing.
To put it plainly, I don’t want to do this anymore, and I’m considering just quitting drinking altogether as a means to this end. I don’t like me when I’m wasted. I don’t like waking up the next morning feeling like shit and knowing that feeling isn’t going away all day. I don’t like having to hear about the stupid stunts I pulled or things I said when I don’t remember them happening. I don’t like knowing that I’ve nullified hours of hard work in the gym every time I get blackout wasted. I’m still young (23) but I’ve had enough of this shit. I’m trying not to make a knee-jerk decision about this, and actually spend some time when I’m not hung over seriously considering what I should be doing and if this is the right course of action. But as it stands right now, having read this thread and had another day to think about it, I think I’m going to be taking a long hiatus from the alcohol (start with a year and go from there).
I won’t be implementing this right away. One of my best friends is getting married in a little over a month and the intent would be to have my last drink at his wedding. This would give me some more time to think about this decision, and give me one more night to see if I can keep myself under some sort of control (at the bachelor party - I know, control is unlikely at this thing, but success would very much be relative). I’ve already got weightlifting nationals the week after he gets married so I’ll only be having a couple on his wedding night anyways, but again, this is one of my best friends and I’m in the wedding party, so if I do wind up embracing sobriety long-term, it seems to me that having my last two drinking occasions be his bachelor party and wedding night is about as good an option as any other.
Anyways, that’s where I stand. Thanks for the replies everyone, been interesting reading everybody’s story.[/quote]
You sound just, just, just, just, justjustjustjustjust like me when I was 23. If you are, then it will only get worse, trust me. My primary clues are: 1. Inability to stop once you’ve started. 2. Desire to quit. 3. Immediate postponing of quitting because of some special occasion at which it is “important” to drink.
The good thing about the program that I introduced above is that you do NOT have to quit. Thinking that you have to “quit” at all is the biggest clue that there is an issue here. Please do not take this the wrong way. The only reason I did not take this to PM is that I would have immensely benefited from reading such an exchange years earlier, when I was actively searching for a solution, if I had been able to find one, and I think this will probably help others. I have been there, man, exactly where you are. Exactly. Read what I wrote above. What I’m offering here (I’m not even the one offering it, I just want to show you) is a chance to not have to FEEL this way AT ALL ANYMORE.
Because, truth be told, people who do not have a problem do not have to ask these questions. They do not have to struggle with these issues because for them it is not an issue. But for others of us, I was certainly one of the worst, we can’t get a handle on it, as much as we want to, and it only gets worse, and worse, and worse. The greatest thing is that you are willing to take an honest look at yourself and ask others for advice. I have someone very, very close to me now who will NOT. I even had him start the program, crying for him as I offered it to him, and he went for it, but his heart was never into it. He was too selfish, and he only did it for me, not for himself. That’s the real key, that YOU fervently desire to be free from that slavery.
Again, I honestly hope you do not take this in any manner other than as the most sincere desire to help you get to the place I am at, because it is SO much better.
Just this past January I was the best man at my best friend’s wedding. My best friend of 20 years, who is as much a brother to me as my own blood brother (he actually IS my blood brother, due to a crazy blood brother hand cutting ceremony we did on a wild drunken night many years ago). I did drink at his wedding. I did not get drunk nor did I have any desire to, and I had one of the greatest nights of my entire life. This is all true.
One more thing I think it is important for me to say. I wanted to clarify and apologize for an earlier statement I made. I made a rather harsh remark about AA further back in the thread that I did not really think about until I received a (very kind) PM from a good guy who found sobriety through AA. I do not have anything but respect for that organization and the people who are courageous enough to participate, and if that is your path to sobriety, then please understand that I think it is just as noble as my own.
My problem is not with the organization, but that certain people, like myself, do NOT respond well to such organizations, for whatever reason. And for people like us, there are alternative solutions.
Alan Carr, who has a fantastic book on how to quit smoking (the premise: you read the book, and by the end, you no longer have ANY desire to smoke, and it freaking works!), has a book in the same vein on how to quit drinking. It did not work for me at all, and I believe a few of his premises are flawed. However, that book has worked for literally thousands of people to cure their actual desire for alcohol in any form (same as the mywayout program if you choose to completely eradicate that desire, up to you). Whatever works, is my philosophy.
Never done it. Im only 18, and my buddy who died last year was the same way as me, never touched the shit and never will till 21. I promised him that i wouldnt and i dont care how much pressure i get, no one can ever out speak my gym partner. Miss him to this day and every time i see his friends who used to be that way until he passed away it makes me sick. I dont smoke either. I know how to have a rowdy time without it…
Ben