Hey everyone. First of all thank you for the very honest and open answers. I really was looking for real advice so don't think I do not appreciate them.
To really put across my point of view I have to write a rambling bunch of shit, so sorry in advance.
Basically in high school I dealt with a lot of shit, I am not looking for sympathy here. Anyway this lead me to getting in with the wrong crowd, drugs etc, the typical teenager hard times cliche.
I ended up being expelled, no qualifications, criminal record all the dumb shit dumb kids with no sort of guidance can get caught up in.
A few years ago I decided I needed to change, I started looking for work, I could only find minimum wage, low hour jobs but I took it. Started working so I could pay my mother some rent. Stopped hanging out with old firends to avoid trouble, which left me really isolated and depressed. I was pretty suicidal for awhile there.
Anyway, basically I stumbled upon MMA while on the computer and instantly fell in love with it.
Joined an MMA school and would go as many hours as I could go, for the first time in literally 5 years I was happy, doing something positive and not sat around hating life.
The problem is, because I work till 5 and don't get into town until 6-6:30 depending on which train I can catch, if they make me work somewhere far away, I can never make training for the beginners class in either muay thai or grappling, which means I never get better. Alot of the time I can't make it at all because I am working 2 hours at night and if they decide I am across town for a month working there, I can not train for a month.
I am 20, have no responsibilities other than paying rent. I can easily cover rent, gym fees and train fare with the one and three quarter hours training a day. I can always get more work doing some manual labour minimum wage job if this does not work out.
MMA is the only thing in my life I have any passion for, I don't drink anymore because I can not do it in moderation, I don't drink or smoke, I am a quiet guy and just hang around with a few friends so I don't spend money on anything other than training and train fare other than rent and some food.
I have not had any amateur fights and I have barely had any consistent training at all in grappling or stand up. Not because I lack dedication but because I am doing some shitty 2 hour job in the evening that stops me doing this.
I am willing to be broke while I only have such low work hours, I will be looking for more work with the company I work for, but a few hours in the morning as opposed to at night.
I have no loans, no money needed to spend on a wife or kids and I don't buy expensive clothes or anything that is financially draining.
I have some money saved away for driving lessons and a car that I will hopefully get soon so really, I can't see any problem with doing this other than generally being broke, but I am anyway.
Basically I don't want to quit at everything, I want to do this more than anything and even if I only had a few amateur fights and I was not good enough to take it any further, I won't regret giving up a few hours of work a day extra to of pursued it.
I will be on the lookout for work that lets me train and work, which will also be much easier once I am driving.
I know I probably sound like an immature kid and I probably am immature, but I really want this and I know I can make something of myself.