Nothing you wrote surprises me. I have been told "unofficially" that I was being antisocial by not eating with others. I won't go into detail, but the military is largely divided based on rank. The people closest to my age and background that work around me are generally of a lesser rank.
I truly have little socially in common with the 50+ year old crowd and, as such, if I chose to eat with anyone in order to joke around and relax, it would not be with those that distant from me in age and interests. There appeared to be an issue because I would eat with those of a lesser rank during lunch. I began eating in my own office to avoid any conflict.
Part of this was because of what was listed above, and the other is because I get tired of what I am eating for the day becoming a major topic of discussion whenever someone sees me eat. Needless to say, I still get the "antisocial" label.
Considering my profession, I am sure I get hassled much less than someone else might openly (aside from what may be said when I am not around). It does not help that I am about the same stats as you at only 5'11". I personally would post no pictures at work of anything, let alone of bodybuilding simply because people are stupid.
I never raise my voice because I understand that doing so even once would cause me to fit a stereotype. At work, I am either in scrubs, or a loose shirt. In other words, I try to cover up as best as possible, but truth be known, when you weigh over 260lbs at my height, anything you wear is going to show how big you are.
What I was raised to consider for other reasons than my size is that I am a focus of attention, therefore, to overcome that, I have to act by a different set of rules. This seems to be something you know nothing about. In professional setting you do not discuss things with the overly emotional woman by raising your hands no matter what the gesture.
If you were 130lbs, it would not matter. Because you are not 130lbs, it does matter. You need to learn to stop giving others ammo. You should have anticipated that response from her, meaning your original action should have been to sit the fuck down and remain more calm than anyone. One loud voice or comment could be used against you.
Remove your pictures from your office because you are under a different set of rules than everyone else. Should it be that way? No, but I have dealt with and experienced things like this long before I lifted weights. Your dress should either be more conservative or equal to that of everyone else at work.
Your voice when speaking should be lower in volume than others around you unless for a specific reason. That is, if your goal is to remain below the radar in any way possible instead of the focus of all attention everywhere you go at work.
Your response to this will be based on how badly you need the job, how badly they need you, and your overall goals if you plan to stay. I personally do not kiss ass. It has never been in me to do so. I attempt to treat people with respect, but the over the top brown-nosing I see from others will never be seen from me.
I choose to deal with the "antisocial" label and do my own thing while simply attempting to have my shit in order so that if ever questioned, there are no issues aside from human factors.