T Nation

Potatoes, Crop of the Zombiecalypse


#1

First, I realize that nobody has waited for this thread but that is only because you are entirely unprepared for the zombiecalypse and will be wiped out anyway.

So, here is the reasoning:

First wheat, rye and corn need to be prepared to be able to be consumed. Given the limited resources available after the complete breakdown of society thats bad.

Then, one hectar of potatoes yields around 15-20 tons of potatoes which is probably half fuckload in the imperial system.

The killer argument though is that wheat and corn grows pretty high, in a corn field a whole flock of zombies could sneak up on you and tear you apart and you would not even see them coming.

Not so with wheat, but crawlers would still be a problem.

Potatoes on the other hand dont grow to far out of the ground, nothing could sneak up on you, so they are perfect for a zombie safe harvest.

Perfectly unrelated:

In Land of the Dead, Dennis Hopper kills someone to flee with FIVE MILLION DOLLARS !!11!!

To go where?

To buy what?


#2

Another reason why Land of the Dead sucked IMO.


#3

But that irked me the most.

Sooooo, all of the US has collapsed but he be gonna flee with the five million dollars !!!1!!

WTF !?!

In related news, the whole game of Quidditch in Harry Potter is shite.

The only reasonable thing would be to fuck everything else and to go after this winged little fucker.

My suspension of disbelief only goes so far.


#4

Orion is high out of his fucking mind right now.

I've never even been that high. This is a new level of highness and I am impressed...afraid too.


#5

This is the price of stealing potatoes in Kenya:

www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video800.php?v=wshh1bU75xMHdx3Qwriz&set_size=1


#6

FOR FUCK SAKE'S !!

You should put a warning for that video, you disturbing so and so!!

Putain de merde, alors!! I was eating some juicy steak!

Shake my head at the law of popular justice...


#7

You're right.

The Link I posted is VERY GRAPHIC. I hope that wasn't too late or something?


#8

They stole potatoes.

You knew what was going to happen.

Potatoes are sacrosanct.


#9

Did they really steal potatoes?

Or did they get punished for something else... sorry I couldn't finish the video. I clearly don't have a strong disposition with this kind of things...


#10

Too late...

I puked my diner on my laptop, buddy...

I saw hiphop on the link and expected a parody video about potatoes, haha!!

Fuck me... that was dense...


#11

Potatoes.

Serious, serious business.

Keep your greedy paws of my nightshades, you have been warned.

I will need them taters when the zombies come.


#12

Well, I guess serious business comes with serious punishment.

Oh well, watching UFC fights now won't help clear my head... so much violence...

Damn you, Raj.


#13

!!!


#14

This is how justice is dispensed in parts Africa. Victim will point out the perp then a mob takes care of the rest. Burning them is SOP.


#15

Yeah.

I'm aware of the African popular justice. I know about the mob beatings and stuff... but shit, burning is a fucking step too far.

Did those guys kill someone to deserve such horrible fate?

They only stole a sack of potatoes, for fuck's sake! <----- okay, that's funny...


#16

Fucking savages, just kill them if you want them dead.


#17

pfft potatos.
Carrots, that's the crop to grow.
Low to the ground, more anabolic.
Plus they make your eyesight good, and Bugs Bunny was pretty smart so there's that to consider.


#18

plus you can pull carrots straight out the ground and eat them, no prep.

raw potato anyone?


#19

That video was over the top... Seriously, you dun took it too far man


#20

That video was seriously one of the worst i have ever seen. Worse than the few beheading videos i have come accross