Polite or Prick

Off Topic
21

Where I live in Jersey, shit like this happens all the time.

The problem with my situations, is that even if I did say something, they most likely wouldnt understand or speak english. Ive become used to horrible drivers, crazy people running across the street in front of me like squirrles and chock full of illegal activity in parking lots and shady alleys and streets.

I reccomend the advice that unless it directly affects you, minimise your confrontations until it does. This advise has only helped me.

22

HaHa! Derek, you must have been posting that as I was typing.

On handicaped spaces- I do chase people down for that. I’ve had to transfer my brother from car to chair and back in the middle of a lane enough times.

I’ve also blocked them in and called the police. That works very well.

23

I think there’s a TON more crap in the world to worry about. We’re a nation at war with a corrupt political system and our values on life keep lowering…But a lady parking in a fire zone gets to you?

24

[quote]Irish Muscle wrote:
Professor X wrote:
Razorslim wrote:

Substitute “Man who is screaming at wife / girflfriend on verge of physical violence” and what would you do?

I would wait for him to attempt to strike. Until then, it is a verbal dispute and none of your business.

These aren’t hard decisions. I can only guess you grew up in a pretty safe environment because if you randomly went around jumping into situations like that in my old neighborhood, you would be dead by the end of the week.

But professor, if you waited around for him to strike, doesn’t that mean you would be analyzing they’re arguement to see the outcome? Doesn’t that put you in the catagory of not minding your own bussiness? I mean, if you were minding your own bussiness, you wouldn’t watch people argue, you would instead carry on with what ever you where doing.

Just like the day i walked by a man throwing a dead baby in the river, i mean, hay, its none of my bussiness.

bull shit way to think.[/quote]

You are an idiot, but we know that already. Apathy is NOT what is being recommended. What is being recommended is an avoidance of ESCALATION. Let that soak in for a minute. The huge difference between the way Doogie described how to handle a situation and how the OP was going to is the lack of ESCALATION. One leads to a more positive outcome where you do NOT end up dead.

Jumping into spousal arguments is a mistake unless someone is actually going to be harmed. If you definitely feel it will happen, call the police and stay the fuck out of it. If the woman is actually GETTING beat, then you can be a man and do something if you have the balls to get into it. Otherwise, jumping into an argument where there is no abuse simply because you jumped to conclusions makes YOU the target.

We know you’re an idiot though so of course that had to spelled out on a fourth grade level. Did you get it that time or does baby need a pencil to take notes?

25

[quote]lostinthought wrote:
I think there’s a TON more crap in the world to worry about. We’re a nation at war with a corrupt political system and our values on life keep lowering…But a lady parking in a fire zone gets to you? [/quote]

exactly.

26

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
About 2 weeks ago, I was walking into my local supermarket when I noticed some teenager (17-19 at a guess) zoom straight into the last disabled parking space near the store. He did it so casually without any visible hesitation that it caught my attention. He got out and went to the cashpoint and I figured that if he was just getting cash, then fair enough; leave him alone. But no, he gets his money and wanders into the store.

I followed him to the sandwich shelves and said “Excuse me but I see you parked in the last disabled bay. Would you like to be disabled?”. I think he took this as “I could disable you you skinny prick”, though that wasn’t at all how I meant it. He looked shocked then came back with the classic “Yeah. Cos I just don’t give a fuck. I do what I want”.

I thought that was pretty typical so I let it go. He wandered away to a safe distance then gave it “Come on then…” in a ‘I’ll fight you kind of way’. I just laughed and said “Keep walking bitch” which cracked up the girl standing next to me.

Anyway, hopefully he’ll think twice before callously parking in a disabled spot again. It wouldn’t have been an issue but it was the very last spot, and he was just so blase about taking it…[/quote]

This would be a good time to get the girl’s number.

27

Maybe that lady was having a really bad day, all sorts of things went wrong and she was late getting her kids some food for supper, or late this…you get the point. So she decides to go up to the store, notices none of the building were on fire and decides to park close. Then some busy body comes up to tell her she’s not allowed to park there. Imagine what her reaction might be in that situation.

29

[quote]Professor X wrote:
lostinthought wrote:
I think there’s a TON more crap in the world to worry about. We’re a nation at war with a corrupt political system and our values on life keep lowering…But a lady parking in a fire zone gets to you?

exactly.

[/quote]

That sounds good, but where do you draw the line? As for me, my yes is yes and my no no; I agree with the Prof that going around trying to police people is ridiculous – I wholeheartedly agree that some woman trying to police his traffic habits is out of line. And I agree that the right approach is probably to notify someone vested with authority.

But I think to sit around and engage in personal, situational ethics, trying to decide which things I care about and which I don’t, somehow diminishes me.

Whether I act or not is the real question here, I think; I see someone littering and it irritates me. People should and do know better, but should I say something? Usually I just go pick it up myself; if they see me do it, all the better. But I’m not about to go lecture them about the evils of littering.

Anyway, this could go on forever. I don’t let it own me, but I appreciate in myself an importance wrt matters of principle. And I won’t dictate to others how they should feel about it. The OP asked what we’d have done, I think, and I like the idea of telling the management of the place that I believe something should be done.

30

[quote]sdspeedracer wrote:

But I think to sit around and engage in personal, situational ethics, trying to decide which things I care about and which I don’t, somehow diminishes me. [/quote]

Then you need to spend some time and “find yourself” because I don’t need to think more than a few seconds about how I feel about certain situation. It is automatic for the most part because I know what my values and standards are.

[quote]

Whether I act or not is the real question here, I think; I see someone littering and it irritates me. People should and do know better, but should I say something? Usually I just go pick it up myself; if they see me do it, all the better. But I’m not about to go lecture them about the evils of littering.[/quote]

I often respond the same way unless that someone is truly a kid and I hold a position of authority.

[quote]

Anyway, this could go on forever. I don’t let it own me, but I appreciate in myself an importance wrt matters of principle. And I won’t dictate to others how they should feel about it. The OP asked what we’d have done, I think, and I like the idea of telling the management of the place that I believe something should be done.[/quote]

…and that’s fine and one way to handle it. It just isn’t the ONLY way and it may not even be the best way.

31

[quote]Professor X wrote:
lostinthought wrote:
I think there’s a TON more crap in the world to worry about. We’re a nation at war with a corrupt political system and our values on life keep lowering…But a lady parking in a fire zone gets to you?

exactly.

[/quote]

Yes, but much of what there is to “worry about” is all but impossible to change as an ordinary citizen.

I know if I see a guy dumping trash out in the woods (woods that get closed to vehicles and pedestrians because of illegal dumping) I’m NOT going to just walk on past because there’s bigger problems I could be “worrying about”. Worrying solves nothing. I’d rather act even if it’s a trivial thing to you.

Creating a more polite, and citizen-friendly environment to live in is not always best left to the cops.

We can all do a little to make everyone else’s day perhaps a bit easier.

I know if saying something to a guy parked illegally in a handicapped spot saved an elderly lady from having to walk across a busy parking lot or confront the guy herself, it was worth it.

Sometimes it’s the little things that make life a pleasure instead of a frustration.

Note: I drove into a particularly dirty, trashed area beside a local lake. I was DISGUSTED at the broken t.v.'s, trash bags, shingles, discarded household furniture, tires, etc.

I went home and wrote a letter about it in the local paper’s editorial page. Last week, I drove there with my son and it was immaculate!

So there is more than one way to accomplish your goals.

32

[quote]Razorslim wrote:

Substitute “Man who is screaming at wife / girflfriend on verge of physical violence” and what would you do?
[/quote]

I would stay out of it.

What if the guy just watched his wife/girlfriend throw their infant out the window because it was crying? Would the guy be wrong to be on the verge of physical violence then?

Point is, it would be nearly impossible to know the full story from both sides before jumping in to “save” someone.

If you really think the guy is wrong, call the police and let them handle it. It’s their job.

I would only step in if it affects me or my family directly.

33

[quote]Irish Muscle wrote:

You said you would mind your own bussiness and wait around until you seen the guy strike the girl. But my harmless point is that you wouldn’t be minding your bussiness if you were waiting around for the guy to strike! I think that was a clever observation by me.[/quote]

If that was “clever” to you, I can only imagine the high regard you hold for random toilet humor.

[quote]

I caught you making a mistake, and i’m proud of myself for that. I’m going to put a golden star on my squat rack, heck i earned it today. [/quote]

A mistake? Make sure they put that gold star right next to “can tie own shoes” and “quit picking nose in class”.

You are an idiot because of past experience with you. The more you type the more apparent it is.

34

[quote]Irish Muscle wrote:

You made a mistake on your grammer. You where supposed to type:

wow i am such a cool dude, caught you twice, two gold stars and a slice of cake after dinner, heck i earned it[/quote]

You mean grammar?

Gold stars indeed;^)

35

[quote]Professor X wrote:
sdspeedracer wrote:
You can politely point out to her that she’s not above the rules and that what she’s doing is illegal. If you approach her with belligerence, she’ll dismiss you; if you approach people like this rationally but firmly, you deny them any argument of their own.

But matters of principle like this kill me – I have to say something. Rules/laws are there for a reason.

And people who do things like try to act like they are civilian police bother me. I had one lady honk her horn at me (FROM BEHIND) and then drive along side of me to yell that I didn’t come to a complete stop at a stop sign.

What you all are doing isn’t much different and, honestly, if you do it to the wrong person at the wrong time, expect a confrontation. If you want to uphold all small illegal acts in society, become a fucking police officer. Otherwise, worry less about other people and simply make sure that YOU are doing what YOU need to do.[/quote]

I’ve had someone honk at me for making a complete stop lol sometimes you can’t win.

36

People at my shit gym will park in the handicap spots, how is that for an asshole? Now before anyone asks we have a physical therapy built into the gym for those who really do need the spots.

37

MYOB is the best philosophy for even the most benign stuff. The other day in Costco, my son and I stopped at a sample stand serving Nature’s Path Oatmeal. There was a woman sampling saying how great Nature’s Path is, I butted in and said “Yeah, except for the soy they put in alot of their products”.

She said “You’ve got to be kidding, soy is one of the best things you can possibly eat”. I replied, “No, it’s not true. Soy has an estrogen mimicking protein in it and it’s not healthy. Especially if the child you are carrying is a boy, it’s very unhealthy.”

As you can imagine it didn’t go well from there. Afterward, I wondered to myself how that went so wrong. The answer being, I opened my mouth.

38

[quote]derek wrote:
On one hand, I see someone park in a handicap spot 2-3 times per week. I NEVER see a handicap plate but they may have a placard on thier dash.

The one time I was feeling like I might actually confront the person and tell him to move, he got out and limped like his foot had just been chopped off.

'Woulda felt like a total dick had I done it. He was elderly to boot.

On the other hand, I was sitting in my truck eating my lunch when a teen and his mom(?) were in a van next to me.

The kid tossed an empty cigarette box and then the cellophane to a new one out the window. I yelled to him to “pick that up” and he did. He got out, picked it up and the van drove off.

That’s the kind of lazy shit I cannot stand. He was totally capable of walking 15 feet to the trash barrel or holding on to it until he got home so he got no free ride from me.

I guess you could argue that it didn’t affect me directly but if that attitude is used too frequently, we all suffer.[/quote]

I agree, there is no need to be a jackass about it, but the rules are there for good reason. Mild confrontation while still being polite is the best way to be IMO.

39

Most, if not all, of the examples tossed out were pretty trivial, but that is just my bullshit opinion. I’m inclined to be bias because I am constantly being sent all over the world, having to deal with less developed cultures. A few observations: Europeans, Americans, and some Oriental countries are normally clean and uphold better standards of social and personal being. The rest, well, don’t. Here in the Middle East, people are just plain dirty, nasty, self-centered, careless, and depraved. No one gives a shit about the past or the future. It’s just “what is in it for me, what is convenient for me, right here and right now.”

The mentality of it all is beyond the scope of my understanding because I’m an American who was brought up clean, with values, foresight, and a future. In our own nations, we have a future, and we also have our own people who just aren’t taught any better. They have no decent influences to speak of, and are very much a product of their environment. If you raise a kid around murderers, gangsters, drug dealers, etc the kid will grow to an adult knowing only that life, and it will be his own in some way. Now, consider the assholes that are just rude, self-serving and just are a nuisance to us all? They do know that they are assholes, but they don’t care, because it’s a situation consisting of “what’s in it for me, right now?”